getting ds ready for sleeping - calming? getting him to stop screaming?

[alison77]

ds2, age 4, will get into bed and immediately go on overdrive. he will sing loudly, yell random words over and over again, scream, laugh, kick around, jump, etc. it's late, or rather, time where he should have no problem calming down and falling asleep. sometimes it is quick and over with, other times he can go on for a whole hour. it is a real problem and anything i say or do does not stop it. i need some advice. he keeps my other ds awake at night, and in general is driving me crazy! what has worked so far for me is putting him in his own bed (he is in ours typically) but that doesn't work easily either because it involves him screaming and crying from his bed and not giving up until he promises he will go right to sleep if i bring him in. so i invariably give him another chance which sometimes works, but sometimes we go through several rounds and i think that is doing nothing for my discipline record with him what can i try?

[BellinghamCrunchie]

A lot of kids get very active when they are overtired. Could it be that he needs his bedtime moved up an hour or so?

My DD sometimes needs help to calm down and hold her body still so she can fall asleep. What is working right now is first we read books in bed, then she lays down and I "draw" on her back with my finger (for ten minutes or so). We used to use relaxing music, but lately she was been saying she doesn't want it - but you could try incorporating it into your nighttime ritual. Or a massage with oil. Anything that is pleasant to him that helps him hold his body still until the sleepiness takes over.

[One_Girl]

I think you should try moving his bed time to an earlier hour so he doesn't get that second wind and giving moving him out of your bed almost immediately so you don't have a long drawn out play fest. If he promises to lay quietly after he is in his bed then I think you should tell him he has one chance and then he is staying in his bed whether he has a fit about it or not.

I think you should also talk to him about this issue in the morning. Tell him how tired you are and what you notice him doing then tell him what the consequence will be if he doesn't lay quietly and allow the family to rest. He may even be able to help with coming up with a consequence which will help him feel more in control of his behavior. If he starts to act out in bed you can then ask him if he is choosing to stay in the bed or go to his own room. I found a format like this very helpful for my dd when she was going through an especially difficult phase. I don't remember what it was, but after talking, setting the expectation and consequence up with her, and asking her which of the two choices she was going to make a few times the problem was gone. It was a huge relief.