My story begins 3 years ago when I tried for a HB and ended up going to the hospital for pain meds after having cervical swelling, going through transition twice, and having baby flip to 100% posterior as I went through transition a third time. I was pushed into labor with natural remedies at 42 weeks, but it took days of pushing and I had days of contractions. At 5 cm, MW broke my water and that sped things up. I got up to 10 cm, but felt no urge to push. MW directed me to push and apparently I had a cervical lip that prevented any movement from the baby. So cervix swelled and I went back to 8 cm and started the process over. After the baby flipped posterior, I endured several hours of back labor before I asked for pain meds. The contractions came continuously. The doctor at the hospital refused me an epidural and told us he would only do a c/s. We felt totally bullied into the c/s because there was no emergency. Fetal heart tones were great. The only issue was my swollen cervix. DD came through it really well. And aside from the usual recovery, I had no issues, except for severe disappointment at how the birth turned out.
This time, I went to the chiro continuously through my pregnancy to make sure everything was lined up correctly. My baby kept changing positions. In the past week he went from posterior to ROA to ROT to LOA while I was in labor.
After doing lots of hands and knees positions to get him turned around, I went into labor naturally at 40+2 at 1 am. The contractions were manageable and I had to breathe and count through them. At 6 am, I woke DH, called my MW, and by 7 we were on our way to the birth center. We got there at 8 and things moved along. By noon, I had spent a long time in the pool and all of the contractions were overwhelming. My MW even asked me if I felt the urge to push because of the frequency and intensity. I didn't feel any urge at all. An hour later I was still trying to get through the contractions. MW wanted to do a cervical check. I had refused all checks. I couldn't be on my back at all. It was too painful, so she ended up doing a check while I was on my side. I screamed like a banshee the whole time. I was only 6 cm. MW was convinced after the intensity and frequency of the contractions, that I should have been closer to 10 cm. She said that she thought something was stopping the baby from moving. After the exam, she said my cervix was posterior and the baby's head was ascynclitic. She said I could continue to labor at the birth center, but she thought it best to transfer to a hospital because an epidural might help me manage and that I might need some pitocin to help get things moving again. She also mentioned that the hospital might refuse to do anything except give me a c/s. I had a small bit of hope that I would be allowed to try for a vaginal birth, but I think I knew that the decision to leave the birth center would lead to a c/s.
We got to the hospital where MW has had transfers before who have had VBACs without problem. The doctor there said I had already had a trial of labor and he hadn't done any VBACs since ACOG changed its guidelines in 2002. Lucky me to get there on a Sunday
Doc said we could try a different hospital or call around to see if another doctor would come in. We felt we had no options because the whole time I was writhing in pain. Doc had an attitude problem to say the least. I didn't want to spend 1/2 hour driving to a different hospital to be told the same thing. I couldn't get on top of the contractions and screamed through each one. Breathing, counting, visualization, nothing helped. The contractions were like nothing I've ever experienced. I couldn't be in any position except on all fours. It took them over an hour to do anything for me because they insisted upon an hour of antibiotics since I didn't have GBS scan.
I begged for pain medication because I could not get on top of the contractions. MW's assistant said at the end of the hour I was probably only up to 7 cm, but it didn't matter because our one option was a c/s at the hospital. I was absolutely devastated. My VBAC dreams gone.
I was prepped for the section, threw up, and got to listen to the doctor tell a resident assistant about all of the dangers I had put myself through trying for a VBAC while he cut me open. He said my uterus was paper thin and would have burst in an hour. Then he told DH to come around the curtain to look at my paper thing uterine walls. I overheard a mention of meconium. There was no sensitivity to me or DH and our decision to try for a VBAC. They took the baby out and he got Apgars of 8 and 9. DS wailed and finally DH got to hold him. I will say that the staff did what they could to accommodate my wishes for post birth. One nurse sneaked me the towel used to rub off the vernix so I was able to rub some back in DS's skin. And they all respected my use of a MW for my pregnancy.
I was able to breastfeed within 1/2 hour of surgery. In fact, DS nursed for about five hours straight. Anytime I removed him from me for the hourly checks, he wailed unconsolably. Finally he fell asleep for a few hours.
Obviously I have been going through so many emotions after this. I wanted a VBAC and am trying to understand why I failed. I did everything right during the pregnancy, but the baby wouldn't/couldn't get into position because of something wrong with my pelvis, uterus, or ligaments. I'm amazed at all of the women I know who ate terribly, had bad posture, never exercised, and then had easy natural births. I want to scream that it isn't fair because I worked so hard for this and am such a supporter of natural birth. And I failed.
Time will help. And my son is absolutely healthy and perfect. I hope that tomorrow I can take my baby home.
This time, I went to the chiro continuously through my pregnancy to make sure everything was lined up correctly. My baby kept changing positions. In the past week he went from posterior to ROA to ROT to LOA while I was in labor.
After doing lots of hands and knees positions to get him turned around, I went into labor naturally at 40+2 at 1 am. The contractions were manageable and I had to breathe and count through them. At 6 am, I woke DH, called my MW, and by 7 we were on our way to the birth center. We got there at 8 and things moved along. By noon, I had spent a long time in the pool and all of the contractions were overwhelming. My MW even asked me if I felt the urge to push because of the frequency and intensity. I didn't feel any urge at all. An hour later I was still trying to get through the contractions. MW wanted to do a cervical check. I had refused all checks. I couldn't be on my back at all. It was too painful, so she ended up doing a check while I was on my side. I screamed like a banshee the whole time. I was only 6 cm. MW was convinced after the intensity and frequency of the contractions, that I should have been closer to 10 cm. She said that she thought something was stopping the baby from moving. After the exam, she said my cervix was posterior and the baby's head was ascynclitic. She said I could continue to labor at the birth center, but she thought it best to transfer to a hospital because an epidural might help me manage and that I might need some pitocin to help get things moving again. She also mentioned that the hospital might refuse to do anything except give me a c/s. I had a small bit of hope that I would be allowed to try for a vaginal birth, but I think I knew that the decision to leave the birth center would lead to a c/s.
We got to the hospital where MW has had transfers before who have had VBACs without problem. The doctor there said I had already had a trial of labor and he hadn't done any VBACs since ACOG changed its guidelines in 2002. Lucky me to get there on a Sunday
Doc said we could try a different hospital or call around to see if another doctor would come in. We felt we had no options because the whole time I was writhing in pain. Doc had an attitude problem to say the least. I didn't want to spend 1/2 hour driving to a different hospital to be told the same thing. I couldn't get on top of the contractions and screamed through each one. Breathing, counting, visualization, nothing helped. The contractions were like nothing I've ever experienced. I couldn't be in any position except on all fours. It took them over an hour to do anything for me because they insisted upon an hour of antibiotics since I didn't have GBS scan.I begged for pain medication because I could not get on top of the contractions. MW's assistant said at the end of the hour I was probably only up to 7 cm, but it didn't matter because our one option was a c/s at the hospital. I was absolutely devastated. My VBAC dreams gone.
I was prepped for the section, threw up, and got to listen to the doctor tell a resident assistant about all of the dangers I had put myself through trying for a VBAC while he cut me open. He said my uterus was paper thin and would have burst in an hour. Then he told DH to come around the curtain to look at my paper thing uterine walls. I overheard a mention of meconium. There was no sensitivity to me or DH and our decision to try for a VBAC. They took the baby out and he got Apgars of 8 and 9. DS wailed and finally DH got to hold him. I will say that the staff did what they could to accommodate my wishes for post birth. One nurse sneaked me the towel used to rub off the vernix so I was able to rub some back in DS's skin. And they all respected my use of a MW for my pregnancy.
I was able to breastfeed within 1/2 hour of surgery. In fact, DS nursed for about five hours straight. Anytime I removed him from me for the hourly checks, he wailed unconsolably. Finally he fell asleep for a few hours.
Obviously I have been going through so many emotions after this. I wanted a VBAC and am trying to understand why I failed. I did everything right during the pregnancy, but the baby wouldn't/couldn't get into position because of something wrong with my pelvis, uterus, or ligaments. I'm amazed at all of the women I know who ate terribly, had bad posture, never exercised, and then had easy natural births. I want to scream that it isn't fair because I worked so hard for this and am such a supporter of natural birth. And I failed.
Time will help. And my son is absolutely healthy and perfect. I hope that tomorrow I can take my baby home.
i am so sorry that you were not able to have a vbac and i am so SO glad that your ds is here safe and sound.
And you didn't fail! Sometimes crap happens no matter what we do.
