If you get in the car we can go home and you can nap

[sapphire_chan]

And it didn't help that I was hungry.

Now she's napping, I've got food, and things are looking tons better.

The worst part about it, is that she nursed! She snuggled! She bounced right up and wandered around the car pushing buttons.... sigh....

Clearly, I need to pack snacks for me too. Or something.

[Katie T]

Hugs, we all have off days.

[Zimbah]

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan

Clearly, I need to pack snacks for me too. Or something.

Me being hungry =

Take snacks! I know the things that really make it hard for me to be patient with DD when she's being difficult (ie a toddler). Being too hungry - I can do something about that, I either grab whatever I can to eat however unhealthy and have even resorted to eating her snacks (which I don't like) in desperation. Being too tired - not a lot I can do about that in the moment but I can and should try to go to bed earlier. Being stressed about work (I work 2.5 days a week) - I'm not very good at dealing with this, stress and worry about work does leak into my interactions with DD which I am sad and sorry about and I know I need to try not to let that happen.

A longwinded way of me saying I feel your pain!

[LCBMAX]

That was us this morning in the parking lot.
Snacks - if I bring half an apple sliced for him, I throw the other half in the bag for me, etc, etc. Even if I'm not that hungry I'll eat it while trying to be patient and figure that's one less thing I'll need to do later during the nap (wrong way to eat, I know, but there it is.)

Subtle manipulative techniques - I keep some desirables around, like an old tube of chapstick. "Surprise, I just found the chapstick - you can have it when you're all buckled in, of course you can!" I alternate that with staring blankly out the window and not engaging beyond what's necessary to keep him safe. "I'd love to sing that song for you once you're all buckled in, you betcha!" Then finally my patience runs out and I say "Ok, this is your turn to get in the carseat. Your turn will end when I count to ten and then it'll be my turn to get you buckled up." I was using a song to count turns but that was too much fun, didn't get it done. Lately he's been hopping in while I'm counting, eager to win the competition for having a turn.

It's so hard when the rest of the day is spent in full-on unconditional parenting, gentle discipline techniques, but I do find that he actually prefers me to give him definitive limits and have the certainty of getting on the road to home. He sometimes cries about missing his turn to get in "all by self" but that ends fast and he then seems so relieved to know what's happening next is the same as every other day.

So give yourself a break - the title of your post is a nice clear statement of intention for a little one! And your hunger and impatience are being felt by your sisters-in-parking-lots all over the place, especially me.

[sapphire_chan]

I think what was getting me is that the usual "once we get home we will..." techniques weren't working. Neither was dangling the rest of her animal crackers in front of her (she gets one bag a week at the activity I was trying to get home from.)

What I finally did, after 30 minutes of letting her mess around, was force her into the seat. She screamed, I got into the drivers seat, she kept screaming, we drove one and a half blocks forward, she stopped screaming. When we got home she was half asleep and miffed looking, she grumbled at me, snuggled her head down onto my shoulder and nursed to sleep in about 5 minutes once we got inside and into bed.

It was like she was stuck in "on" and I had to trip her circuit breaker to let her turn off.

ETA: not that I'm recommending waiting 30 minutes, it's just that when I tried to force her into the seat after 5 minutes and 15 minutes, I couldn't do it without feeling like I was going to hurt her since she was resisting so strongly.

[LCBMAX]

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan

It was like she was stuck in "on" and I had to trip her circuit breaker to let her turn off.

ETA: not that I'm recommending waiting 30 minutes, it's just that when I tried to force her into the seat after 5 minutes and 15 minutes, I couldn't do it without feeling like I was going to hurt her since she was resisting so strongly.

totally. been there. hate it.
so now I tell him before we even get to the car if it's ok to mess around and play or if we're just zipping on outa there. and if I say it's a zippy departure, boy howdy, I better follow through.

[sapphire_chan]

Originally Posted by LCBMAX

totally. been there. hate it.
so now I tell him before we even get to the car if it's ok to mess around and play or if we're just zipping on outa there. and if I say it's a zippy departure, boy howdy, I better follow through.

: Okay, totally starting this. I'm going to have to start leaving some places earlier to make sure there are play around exits .

[RosemaryS-F]

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan

And it didn't help that I was hungry.

Now she's napping, I've got food, and things are looking tons better.

The worst part about it, is that she nursed! She snuggled! She bounced right up and wandered around the car pushing buttons.... sigh....

Clearly, I need to pack snacks for me too. Or something.

I missed something! What was the situation exactly?

[sapphire_chan]

not wanting to get in her carseat after playgroup. We'd wanderes around, nursed, read stories, pretended to drive the car, climbed back and forth between the front and back of the car. Pretty much everything that helps her get ready to hop up into her seat when she isn't tired only she was tired so she kept looking for more stuff to do to boost her flagging energy.

[RosemaryS-F]

So you usually wait until she wants to get in the carseat to put her in?

[sapphire_chan]

Originally Posted by RosemaryS-F

So you usually wait until she wants to get in the carseat to put her in?

Or get her to play with the toy, book, or snack she does wants in the car seat. She doesn't necessarily always *want* to get in the car seat, but 90% of the time she's amenable to the request to get in, and most of the rest of the time she goes for it after a few minutes. (Barring needing to nurse, but I know that's going to take a longer time before we even settle into the car to do so.)

That long list of stuff we did is unusual. Typically it'd be one or two things at most.