
She said she found grace in the renovations. I'm laughing so hard I might wet myself considering how far from grace I feel at the moment. Ah well... it looks like a neat read! Actually, when we were rehabbing the State St house (1915 Craftsman that was dorked with by Bloody Stupid over the years, then was a real live on the police route drug house before we bought it) I found a series of mystery books where the heroine was rehabbing her old house... I forget the name of the series but it was set in tippy top northern Maine and the mysteries hinged on knowledge of home repair and DIY techniques.

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MamaofThree- big hugs. Drink something, put your feet up, and find the "when the bleeding was ok" thread over in Birth and Beyond. I'm sorry you have this stress and fear. Hang in there.
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I've been feeling a bit down these past few days. It may be the whole sleep deprivation thing, but there's also been some random social stuff that isn't the end of the world or even very serious but it's just sort of made me feel misunderstood. Bleh. I hope Tor moves past this super cling phase and starts sleeping again, and I hope I can find my way back into a cheerful mood.
Actually, I realized something a bit wacky. I put a lot of stuff on my TM about being happy. "I AM HAPPY" is actually the quote right at the center of the map! And I think about this a lot... so today I realized that while I "want" to be happy, I'm also leery of happiness. It's like, I feel as if I'm not getting a lot of attention or support in the day to day life stuff. So I'm depressed or down and this gets noticed and then people offer to help out or offer a hug or something like that. But if I'm happy, what then? Will I lose the little support I do have because people assume I'm ok with the situation?
It's a bit hard to describe the train of thought, and it does seem pretty ridiculous in writing. I wish I had a way of telling people that I may be happy in myself but not happy with the situation I find myself in... so that I'd still have support for the situation despite not being on the verge of collapse. Anyway, I find this getting in the way of following happiness. I tell myself "I am happy" but I add a disclaimer of sorts that undercuts my intention.
Deep thoughts for a slightly depressing weekend!

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