Well, I have been thinking about some of the comments everyone has made and yes it was my bad decision making that got me in this mess in the first place....I didn't marry my husband because I loved him (the whole time I kept telling myself "I will learn to love him", "I will learn to love him")...he was actually my second choice, the guy I really wanted to marry wasn't ready to settle down, but wanted to establish a career and experience life...we were only 19 and 20 so that is pretty young. Anyway, out of my own imaturity I found another guy that was failry decent and was willing to get married and so we did...I was only 20 (currently 28)when we got married so please don't ask me why I did it...I have heard it from everyone and all I can say is that I was very immature. So that was why I married him...it has been a *rocky* marriage at best and then we had kids about 5 years into the marriage...I was actually a work outside the home mom until my second was born so when I decided to get pregnant with the second things were not like they are now...we were fairly happy with one child and wanted to bring another in because we were so in love with the first and with me staying home with the second it just seems as though things just get really bad...I think that we were all much happier when I was working outside of the home..I always thought that I wanted to be a stay at home, partially because my mom was a pretty good SAHM, the house was always clean, home cooked meals, very organized to 3 kids...she was my role model, but I really don't feel very organized being at home, I feel as though I have way too much time on my hands and don't know how to organize it...On another note, my husband is a workaholic...he absolutely refuses to take time off if he is sick and he doesn't understand why I should get any time off...even while he is out of town for 6 months..I am supposed to be this happy-go-lucky mom who just loves to play with the kids and not need any breaks...he critisizes me if I complain to him about it...I just think husbands should be compassionate and understanding....that's all for now I guess...
post #41 of 45
3/14/04 at 1:24am