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If you are glad you left your son(s) intact, post here

post #1 of 68
Thread Starter 
Hi all! I'm hoping for a "sticky" thread that will correspond to the current sticky of "If you regret........."

This will be a postive, life-affirming, integrity-affirming thread.

So, if you're happy and you know it, clap your hands............:LOL

No, actually, if you're happy you left your son(s) intact..........we want to hear all about it!

I'll start........

My son is a toddler and intact. Every day I'm at peace that we left him intact! I know I am closer to him because I left him with something that so many other boys have had taken away from them.

Now I'm a total "intactivist" (see Senior Member Title!). I have the following bumper stickers on my car: "God Makes Perfect Babies: Say No To Circumcision" and "www.StopCirc.com"

And I have an outfit for my son that reads, "Intact and Lovin' It!"
post #2 of 68
We left our boy intact!
I am very happy with our decision (although it really wasn't "our" decision to make).......
My dh was pretty upset when I told him we weren't circ'ing.:LOL He said stuff like: "I'm the dad! I'm the one with the penis! I should have a say in this!" I said, "Nope. I'm growing this baby. I'm birthing this baby. No one is going to genitally mutilate this baby. I'm sorry your foreskin was amputated, but our son's will not be." End. Of. Discussion. Poor thing:
After changing my intact son's diapers for nearly two years now, circ'd penises kind of gross me out. I mean, I see this HUGE scar, a penis that looks aroused even when it isn't because the head is always exposed... and I want to KILL..... I MEAN KILL...... the doctor that mutilated my poor husband. All I can picture is my poor dh in a sterile military hospital in Germany, strapped down, without pain medication, being ripped at, pulled on, sliced at for ten minutes straight I can't even imagine the sheer torture, the horror this innocent, beautiful newborn experienced in those first couple of days of life here.

I know, know, KNOW that it leaves deep psychological scars. My dh has them but hasn't really dealt with them yet. Not only that, but I can tell, because his penis is slightly bent, that they took off too much foreskin during the circ. When I did some research, I found out that most men have cosmetic and functional defects due to circ. but don't realize it..... because men don't go around showing each other their penises, ya know? And erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation run rampant because doctors lop off an extremely important, fully functioning body part with the belief that there may be some kind of potential benefit:

I know that if I ever got my son circumcised, I wouldn't be able to deal with it. I want to cry every time I see a baby boy with a circ'd penis. It's really difficult for me to not judge a parent who would intentionally harm their child for cosmetic surgery...... esp. after I learned that less than 25% of children receive anesthesia for the procedure It makes me ill to think that women aren't stronger and actually give in to the pressure to circ. their beautiful baby boys. Not ill, as in, "I hate you! You're a bad mother!" But, literally, I get sick to my stomach and want to cry.

I hope that male genital mutilation will become illegal, just as all forms of female genital mutilation are. I'm glad I was strong enough to go against the grain and change my friends' minds about circ'ing, as well
post #3 of 68
Oh, and I also wanted to add...... taking care of my son's intact penis is soooo easy! It doesn't retract yet, so all I have to do is wipe him off and be done with it! Sometimes the tip gets a little red, but that's because he plays with it all the time and is gradually retracting the foreskin himself.
post #4 of 68
Thread Starter 
Great story, Candiland!!!

Keep the stories coming, everyone!!!

PS. My dh wasn't upset when I told him we weren't circ'ing.......I guess that puts him in the minority, since a lot of dads get upset. But you're right......the mamas have to GET STRONG and protect those baby boys!!!

And ya' know, I certainly don't do everything right as a parent, but I always have the knowledge that I left him intact and I have breastfed him. Those things I have done right!
post #5 of 68
I hadn't really thought about it before I was pg, but all I had to do was read Dr. Sears' description of a circumcision in his book to decide I didn't want to to do it.

The only bad thing has been lots of bad advice from MDs about how to take care of it (but that helped pushed me out their door and into the welcoming arms of homeopathy, a good thing!).

I love my boy so dearly and can't imagine hurting him for no good reason. I feel sorry for kids who have to go through it.
post #6 of 68
I am clapping my hands too. I knew I would never circ. my son. Dh and I talked about it once, he couldn't have done it either. My OB "almost" looked disappointed when I told her we weren't circing. Ugh.

My sister's oldest son ws circed...my sister struggled with this...21 years ago. She gave in to the pressure of looking like dad. The doctors made an error and my nephew is actually only partially circed. They left some of the skin on somehow. It was terrible for my sister and bil, because here they made that decision and it wasn't even properly performed. She has had two more sons and left them both intact. As is every other male child in our family (me and my sisters).
Ben was so happy and perfect when he was born...I felt love and protection for him. He seems to like his penis just the way it is too
post #7 of 68

Re: If you are glad you left your son(s) intact, post here

Originally posted by somemama

No, actually, if you're happy you left your son(s) intact..........we want to hear all about it!

This is such a happy idea!! I wish I'd thought of it, but instead I couldn't stand it told my story on the 'if you regret it' thread... I'm just silly, I guess... but I was wanting to make some of them feel better. My reasoning was that my dh was THIS CLOSE to doing it.. I had told him clearly that if it was up to me I would never do it, but nearly failed my ds by figuring it should really be my man's decision. I told him that if he was going to let them do it, he could damn well be in there and hold ds's hand while it happened, because I couldn't possibly stand by and let that happen. I really see my son being intact as the grace of God, not my brilliant decision. I wanted them to know it could happen to anyone, and the thing to focus on now is that they will never let it happen again! So if you want to hear about us, you can look me up in the 'regret' thread. I'm the one that has an adorable puppy and Ewan McGregor to thank!

It's interesting how these stories kind of mirror our birth stories.. You just want to share it with someone! It's so gratifying to know what you've successfully shielded your child from. I'm more grateful every day as I learn some new horror relating to circ'ing that we dodged that bullet.. or scalpel.

My husband was pretty receptive as well; he hadn't ever really thought about it either. He's suffering from things physically that I believe are directly related to his circ. He now agrees it's an outright atrocity. And the more I learn, the more I feel like I'm almost mourning my dh's foreskin! To think of the love we COULD have made, you know? Things work, but we'll always wonder how things might have been different!! I don't know if his parents chose it or were unaware of it. I would imagine they chose it, just based on their personalities. I don't think we've ever mentioned ds intact state to them, and my mil and step-fil are planning on coming out in the next month, and I wonder if A)they'll even get close enough to notice and B)have the guts to comment if they do and C)how they'll respond if they notice.

It makes me so sad to see circ'd little boys, too. My nephew is 2 1/2 month younger than my ds, but my SIL is 11 years younger than me- still a teen- and I tried SO HARD to get her interested in things like natural childbirth, bf, not circ'ing, but she refused to learn anything. Literally refused all info. She was just so fearful! He's the sweetest little guy, but it breaks my heart when I change his diaper. When I can't even convince someone to educate themselves, I feel like I've failed that baby.

Anyway, what a great thread!

post #8 of 68
I'm glad Brandon's in tact!

DH is circ'ed but I wouldn't allow "I don't want him to be different" to be a good excuse...we did our research and decided against circ...we don't regret it!
post #9 of 68

Both of my sons are the way nature intended them to be!

It was never an issue with DH, or family, or my pedi.

We have had no problems with 'maintenance'...LOL..
(what maintenance!! :LOL )

*Happy* we did nothing is an understatement!
post #10 of 68
Of course, I would never circ any of my children.
post #11 of 68
Checking in w/ my intact DS! So glad my SIL passed on her anti-circ info!
post #12 of 68
Happy happy happy that I left my little man intact

Strangely enough, my husband (who is circ'd) was the one who pushed for not circ'ing him. I'd never given it much thought. Just assumed that circ'ing was the way things were done. He was so against it and encouraged me to do some research on the subject.

I'm happy to say that I saw the light and my little man is intact just the way God intended him to be
post #13 of 68
What's there to regret? It's like saying "Do you regret leaving your child with all theri fingers and toes?" It's the sensible thing to do- not rob your child of body parts that arent' yours!

post #14 of 68
both boys intact here, one is 5 and the other will be 10 on saturday! DH gave me no problems at all.
post #15 of 68
I am so happy ds is intact! He went through a lot in the first four days of his life in the NICU with IVs coming out of his limbs (and then his poor head ), I can't imagine having added a circumcision to his suffering.

I am so happy that he will get to grow up to enjoy his body as nature intended it to be enjoyed! Every time I change his diaper or watch him run around naked, I delight in his sturdy, strong, healthy, perfect little self.

The more I learn about circumcision, the angrier I become, at the doctors who perpetuate this barbaric custom, at the parents who bow to convention or fail to research, at the families who pressure for circumcision. I am angry at my in-laws not only for circing my dh but even now refusing to learn about what circ really is - so that their other grandsons will pay the price of their ignorance.

There is no good reason to circumcize a baby. Not one.
post #16 of 68
post #17 of 68
Hi! You can add us to the happily intact list! Thank God for my dh because it was actually his idea to leave our ds intact! He saw how it was done and said NO WAY! I guess it helps that his younger brother is intact - so he knows it is normal.
post #18 of 68

soooooooo glad

DH (circ'd) & I are so glad about keeping DS intact.
We call it his little windsock when it's standing @ attention.
but really.... it's the best gift we could give him - to leave him as he came out.
post #19 of 68
Ds is intact, as is his dad, and his gandpa. Couldn't be happier
post #20 of 68
Hi Everyone,

I am also happy happy happy that my sons are normal. As mothers I feel VERY strongly that it is our responsibility to protect them.


Mother of Christian and Sebastian -- Two beautiful boys
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