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(facebook) i can't be the only one! is anyone else bothered by...

post #1 of 41
Thread Starter 
...the "real women look like (x)" "real women have (this attribute), not (that derogatory statement of a different attribute)" and "(y) girls are better than (z) girls" pages going around on facebook right now?

i mean, really! i'm all for body acceptance and loving and appreciating what you have, but all these people "liking" these pages can't be thinking about how insulting these pages are! can you imagine someone telling your daughter that she's not a "real woman" because she doesn't look like (x)? or telling her that she's inferior because she has a certain body type? the body-acceptance cause is NOT helped by insults.

i'm sure the people on my friends-list must think i'm nuts or an insufferable busybody about this, because after sitting with it and stewing for a couple of days, i finally made a status update about how i felt, and started messaging individual people who "like" these pages to tell them about it.

surely, i'm not alone in feeling like this!

christina
post #2 of 41
I have to agree that they're annoying... i try to ignore them, though
post #3 of 41
I haven't seen anything like that yet.
post #4 of 41
Wow, I haven't seen anything like that and I am on it all day lol

I do want to warn you though, If you get a video through facebook on your wall from any of your friends about an optical illusion, delete it right away. DO NOT open it. It's a virus that can be spread throughout your friend list. I got this last night, I deleted it. Do the same!!

It looked pornish to me so I deleted it without thought. Then got a message from the sender, who was frantic about me not opening it. I assured him I didn't.
post #5 of 41
I am a tad annoyed by them. I was lucky enough to be raised in a family with women in literally all shapes. I have one sis who is about 6 feet tall and weighs 110 lbs. Another who is 5'4 and weighs 99 lbs. Another who is 5'4 and weighs 150. And so on. I have super skinny sisters and curvy sisters. To me, we all are real women. There's no need to put down other body types to justify my own or to feel safer in my own skin! So i ignore the groups on there.
post #6 of 41
There are so many things that annoy about facebook the different groups are waaay down on my list, lol. I'm more annoyed by the "copy this is you love your kids" and stuff like that. Its like, really, can't you be more original? And it makes me want to watch this video everytime, lol: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVA047JAQsk
post #7 of 41
I haven't noticed those - but yeah, it sounds annoying!
post #8 of 41
Newp, you're not the only one. This was my status Tuesday:

Quote:
For the record: I wear a size 18. I believe "real" women DO come in a size 0. And a size 30. And every single size in between. I have always hated to be judged based upon my dress size; far be it from me to do the same to another woman. Bodacious curves or boyishly shaped, REAL women do indeed come in all shapes.
Of course, two days before that, it was:

Quote:
Every time I read the title of the page (I think it's a page) "IF I SPOKEN TO MY PARENTS HOW KIDS TALK NOW DAYS I`D BEEN KNOCKED OUT" I can't help but bemoan the fact that a lot of people on my friends list apparently grew up being physically abused because they used proper grammar.
post #9 of 41
I think the thing with this is that the other real women, the ones who are skinny, big breasted with a tiny waist, small breasted with a tiny waist, x attribute with a tiny waist...

They are all ready being put out there as real women, whether they end up having to get airbrushed or not. Which they usually do. And people are starting to get really PO'd about it.

No need to put any one down, true. No need to say X is better then Y, true. There is a real need to say "real women can and do look like this!" Especially with all of the fat phobia going around in todays society. It's no about validating one self as much as it is about saying "This is what I look like and you can shove you 'ideal body type' somewhere painful because I am not buying it."
post #10 of 41
Quote:
Originally Posted by MusicianDad View Post
No need to put any one down, true. No need to say X is better then Y, true. There is a real need to say "real women can and do look like this!" Especially with all of the fat phobia going around in todays society. It's no about validating one self as much as it is about saying "This is what I look like and you can shove you 'ideal body type' somewhere painful because I am not buying it."
Then say it, don't insult someone else instead. It's really that simple. Real Women Ain't a Size 0...Real Women Have Curves! is analogous to saying "Real Women Ain't a Size 20...Real Women Are Fit!" If the second is bad, the first is too. I don't need to tear anyone down in order to reject the stupid cultural ideal of beauty that's out there.
post #11 of 41
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sagesgirl View Post
Then say it, don't insult someone else instead. It's really that simple. Real Women Ain't a Size 0...Real Women Have Curves! is analogous to saying "Real Women Ain't a Size 20...Real Women Are Fit!" If the second is bad, the first is too. I don't need to tear anyone down in order to reject the stupid cultural ideal of beauty that's out there.
Yeah but "real women look like x" is not tearing anyone down. It is making a statement of fact. Why is that a bad fact to state?

I do believe I said there is no need to put anyone down. In fact you included it in your quote. I do believe there is a need to make it known we don't accept the official standard of what a healthy, active woman looks like as the one true woman.

We as a society continue to reject the idea that any person who is over a predetermined size is not by default a lazy, inactive, unhealthy slob

Maybe someone should start a group that argues against that presupposition. Or maybe that is just what they are trying to do with these pages. Argue that a woman doesn't have to be a size 0, because right now everywhere you go in NA you are bombarded by size 0 women as being the perfect women and the non-size 0 women are unattractive, lazy, incapable of being loved because they are "too fat".
post #12 of 41
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by MusicianDad View Post
Yeah but "real women look like x" is not tearing anyone down. It is making a statement of fact. Why is that a bad fact to state?
hey, op here. "real women look like x" is indeed a statement of fact and should not be taken as an insult, but the facebook page in question is actually called, "real women have (this), not (that derogatory statement of a different attribute)", which i definitely have a problem with. i apologize for not being clear.

christina
post #13 of 41
Yeek, I haven't seen this. Kinda glad I haven't.
post #14 of 41
Quote:
Originally Posted by lafemmedesfemmes View Post
...the "real women look like (x)" and "(y) girls are better than (z) girls" pages going around on facebook right now?
I was bothered enough that I went out and joined 3 groups: All women, curvy or skinny deserve love and respect =) FTW,
Skinny, Curvy, or Plus Size...ALL Women are BEAUTIFUL!!!
And NO body type is "BETTER" than another: curvy, skinny or average!

When that bra thing was going around and people kept putting nude as their bra color status, I ended up joining three groups called, Nude is not a color!

post #15 of 41
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kristine233 View Post
There are so many things that annoy about facebook the different groups are waaay down on my list, lol. I'm more annoyed by the "copy this is you love your kids" and stuff like that. Its like, really, can't you be more original? And it makes me want to watch this video everytime, lol: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVA047JAQsk
LOL! that was epic.

sharing! on facebook, of course! :-D

christina
post #16 of 41
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sagesgirl View Post
Newp, you're not the only one. This was my status Tuesday:
Quote:
For the record: I wear a size 18. I believe "real" women DO come in a size 0. And a size 30. And every single size in between. I have always hated to be judged based upon my dress size; far be it from me to do the same to another woman. Bodacious curves or boyishly shaped, REAL women do indeed come in all shapes.
Of course, two days before that, it was:
Quote:
Every time I read the title of the page (I think it's a page) "IF I SPOKEN TO MY PARENTS HOW KIDS TALK NOW DAYS I`D BEEN KNOCKED OUT" I can't help but bemoan the fact that a lot of people on my friends list apparently grew up being physically abused because they used proper grammar.
LOL! nice!

christina
post #17 of 41
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Viola View Post
I was bothered enough that I went out and joined 3 groups: All women, curvy or skinny deserve love and respect =) FTW,
Skinny, Curvy, or Plus Size...ALL Women are BEAUTIFUL!!!
And NO body type is "BETTER" than another: curvy, skinny or average!
nice! i'm glad there are people in facebook-land who were annoyed enough to create these groups! me, i'm on facebook enough as it is-- i don't need to add page-maintenance to the time-sink!

christina
post #18 of 41
I clicked on this thread, switched back to my Facebook tab, and three friends had just joined the group " *X* girls are better than *Y* girls." Within a minute.

I understand being proud of your body and I understand that women come in all shapes and sizes, but if I started a group called "*Y* girls are better than *X* girls," I'd be effing stoned to death.

I think I'm going to join the three groups a PP mentioned.
post #19 of 41
Ladies and gent, let me introduce you to something called the "hide" button. I have hidden many a facebook friend. Some for just being annoying/pretentious, some for posting virtually nothing but pleas for Farmville crap (I've hidden the $#*&ing applications, but dang if people don't waste their status space asking for nails and sheep and lordy only knows what else), some for saying something I find personally offensive. Occasionally, joining an offensive/stupid group is enough to get ya hidden. This way, they're still my "friend" and can contact me if they want, but unless I actually click on their profile, I don't have to read what they're going on about.

I occasionally get all "nice" and go in and un-hide everyone, and then soonafter regret my charitable action and they end up re-hidden again .
post #20 of 41
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sagesgirl View Post
Then say it, don't insult someone else instead. It's really that simple. Real Women Ain't a Size 0...Real Women Have Curves! is analogous to saying "Real Women Ain't a Size 20...Real Women Are Fit!" If the second is bad, the first is too. I don't need to tear anyone down in order to reject the stupid cultural ideal of beauty that's out there.
Exactly. I saw that group the other day and was shocked. Why is that ok?

And I love the hide button. There's really only so much of another person's self-induced drama I can really handle.
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