DS woke up 18 times last night. EIGHTEEN.

[Bendemolena]

I am desperate.

We bedshare, always have. He's almost 16 months. He's teething molars, but has been for over a month now. He wears an amber teething necklace. Hyland's tablets don't work for him. He refused the (non-recalled) Motrin we offered (which he generally sucks back greedily if he's in pain). We do a nice relaxing bath before bed, and he has plenty of time outside in the afternoon and evening to run off some energy. No major changes in his life. Same bedtime routine.

He slept well from 815 until 11, when he just kept. waking. up. Crying, fussing to nurse. I would nurse him laying down and he would either fall asleep for 5 minutes and wake back up or roll off and resume his irritating habit of standing up in bed, climbing on me, headbutting me, whacking my head, etc.

This 18 times is a record, but he has ALWAYS woken up at least 3-6 times at night, and NEVER slept more than 3 hours at a time.

I refuse to believe I just have a crappy sleeper and nothing can be done about it. Any advice?

[~cassie]

Are you sure nothing else is going on--ear infection, getting sick?

My 21 mth old doesn't sleep through most nights either-usually up twice a night at most, but last week when he had an EI and strep, he was up all night long, every 10-15 mins. No sleep help since I obviously can't get my guy to sleep great either.

[marispel]

I was going to say EI too. So, did he ever take the motrin? I would keep offering it...possibly even a suppository if he is in pain but you can't get him any relief.

[gagin37]

my ds would have nights like that when he was cutting molars. It was AWFUL. We'd have two nights in a row of no sleep, constant fussing, crying, pain, then a tooth would erupt. i think the first four molars took umm, 3 months to finish cutting. he normally wakes 3-4 times before being up for the day. We're nightweaning now, so that has everything all shook up.

[just_lily]

That sounds really hard. Hugs, mama.

Two thoughts for you...

- Have you had him evaluated for sleep apnea? My friend's DD was a terrible sleeper much like you described and everyone was telling her it was just bad parenting. Turns out her DD actually had enlarged adenoids and which were causing many apnea episodes every night. She had the adenoids out and is now a much better sleeper. This was diagnosed by getting a referral to an ENT, and then doing a sleep study (at home).

- Alternatively, may I gently suggest that bedsharing may not be working anymore? I am as pro co-sleeping as the next MDC mama, but only if everyone is getting good sleep. Some kids just prefer their own space. We co-slept when my DD was an infant, but as she closed in on 18months is just wasn't working anymore. We all kept each other up as we tossed and turned. I was getting tired of being kicked in the head, and DD thought it was play time at 3am. So we gently transitioned her to her crib full-time (she had been starting the night in her crib for months by then). So if it really isn't working, maybe it is time to try something else? (Of course if co-sleeping is really important to you, ignore the previous.)

Good luck!

[rachelsmama]

DS is teething molars right now and it's making his nose run, so if he's lying down he can't sleep well, he needs to be propped up (I'm really loving the recliner right now) and music seems to help.

[OdinsMommy0409]

Totally off-the-wall, but my DS is a zebra in a world of horses.

Does he have an insatiable thirst during the day or seem to have excessively wet diapers? My DS went through a similar thing waking every 20-45 minutes with inconsolable crying until he could really nurse. He would nurse with similar frequency or more during the day.

[YayJennie]

Originally Posted by just_lily

- Alternatively, may I gently suggest that bedsharing may not be working anymore? I am as pro co-sleeping as the next MDC mama, but only if everyone is getting good sleep. Some kids just prefer their own space. We co-slept when my DD was an infant, but as she closed in on 18months is just wasn't working anymore. We all kept each other up as we tossed and turned. I was getting tired of being kicked in the head, and DD thought it was play time at 3am. So we gently transitioned her to her crib full-time (she had been starting the night in her crib for months by then). So if it really isn't working, maybe it is time to try something else? (Of course if co-sleeping is really important to you, ignore the previous.)

Good luck!

I agree with this 100%! I am all for co sleeping, and have been since my son was born. But recently (he's 13 months old) we started leaving him in his pack and play in the beginning of the night and only bringing him into bed with me after 2am. Amazingly, he slept 8 hours straight the other night! I'm pregnant and exhausted and really need the extra sleep. We have a side carred crib, but even that was too close for my son, and he was waking every 2-4 hours to nurse. I'm slowly night weaning him, as my milk is decreasing drastically, and the separate sleeping arrangements seem to be helping a ton.

Obviously, that's not for everyone, and if your son is in pain and needs you to comfort him, then maybe that's not best. But it's worth a try!

[Bendemolena]

Thanks for all the suggestions everyone!

We've tried having him on his own floor mattress next to ours but it doesn't work. As soon as he wakes up, he just climbs right up into our bed. We've moved it in and out of our room two or three times already, but it doesn't help the sleep at all and actually seems to make him more clingy because he's very sensitive to perceived rejection/distancing from me. He never even slept in the bassinet or amby when he was little - he has always had a strong need for physical contact. I would love to transition him to his own bed eventually b/c we want to get pregnant again, but he's just not ready right now.

I don't think he has an ear infection. He has no signs at all of that, or of any illness. I had not thought about sleep apnea. I will be sure to ask his pediatrician at his next appointment.

We had tried a partial night weaning about a month ago, and had some ups and downs with it, but he's gone back to frequent night nursing with absolute and immediate hysterics if I refuse. *sigh* One step forward, two steps back, I guess.

[marispel]

My DS never..never...showed signs of an EI. We took him in for his vaccines and he had an EI. It got worse and worse...but he never pulled or rubbed his ears. Never. About a month ago he was finally over back to back colds and we took him in for vaccines....Strep throat. He showed no signs of his throat being sore. He was eating, sleeping, etc.

The fact that your LO is waking up soooooo often would seem like his ears are hurting. I would definitely take him to your Dr. just for peace of mind.

I agree with others on trying his own room/crib. It takes 3-4 nights for a change like this to get better, so give it time. I would recommend you & your hubby come up with a plan and then stick to the plan. Consistency is the key with change. If you put him in a crib one night, but not the next - he'll get confused. Since he is so attached, I would recommend sitting with him until he falls asleep. If he wakes in the night - sit with him again/nurse, but put him back in the crib. The only way to make a change is to actually change. Seems silly, but I read so often where parents want to change a habit yet they keep doing the same thing over and over.

[kcparker]

Bendemolena, I just came on here to give you a hug because 18 times is out of control. My advice is to tough it out with the knowledge that it's temporary - it sounds like he's teething and very uncomfortable. My son's molars were way worse for him than the incisors and canines, and he's have little bouts of lots of night-waking and crying when they were coming in. Have you tried giving him something to chew on like ice chips or frozen peas in one of those net bags or a frozen teether?

I also think that maybe kids have growth spurts and get growing pains. I can remember how much my legs would ache as a teenager when I was growing fast, and I imagine it might be similar for a little one, but they don't have the tools to understand it like an older child would. You could try doing some baby massage on him too, just to help relax him. The Vimala Schneider McClure book has a very nice routine, and you could just do part of it and see what results you get after a week or so. My sons both love massage, and if your guy is a high-touch kid, it might even work to soothe him back to sleep.

The other thing I would suggest, based on my experience ECing my kids, is that he might be waking up because he needs to potty, or he's peed his pants and woken up because of that. You could explore that as a possible cause.

Also, how dark is the room, how much noise is there - would blackout curtains and a fan be helpful?