Need help/support. I have to talk to my dad... - Page 2

[Smokering]

Sounds like the dialogue is going well!

I feel your pain. Mum's pre-diabetic and eats carbs and sugar. Her doctor put her on a weight-loss diet to stave off diabetes but guess what... it's low-fat, medium/high carb. So. We have a great relationship, or at least she lets me witter on about my latest hobbyhorse whenever I want, so I've broached the NT theories of fat and weight loss. She's unsure, though - she's worried about what her doctor would think, and feels there's so much conflicting diet information out there that it's too hard/risky to decide and it's better just to trust the experts. And she says things like "But I already DO eat fat, and look what happens!" - except that margarine on white bread isn't a high-fat diet in the traditional sense!

Ach well. I've offered to lend her Nourishing Traditions, but my copy's new and I need to devour it a bit more first!

ETA: Grains ARE cheaper, no doubt about it. I was eating low-carb for a while, but had to up our grains, bread and potatoes a while back when we got poor. I've gained weight; very annoying. Currently we're less broke but a flatmate's just moved in who likes my homemade bread, so... I need willpower. I love my carbs!

[organicmidwestmama]

grains are cheaper, per ounce/pound then meat or eggs, or milk or fresh veggies, its true and very sad to me. i would say though that even eating confinement fed animal products is probably better nutritionally, and from a weight-control perspective, then eating lots of bread, noodles, crackers, etc.

if the cheapest meat and eggs, and non-organic veggies are all you can afford, and you are crrently eating cheap, unsoaked grains, why not switch some starch for some veg or meat? ground beef, and whole chickens are generally less then 3$ a lb here in the midwest of the usa, for non-organic/non-grassfed and from a factory farm. chicken is often less then 1$/lb at big box grocers. frozen vegetables are often fresher then "fresh" veggies that have been sitting on the shelves at the store, and they are usually less expensive.

[berry987]

I could have written this post (well, in terms of the diet stuff). I read Good Calories, Bad Calories a few months ago and it had a HUGE effect on me. And, as with you, my dad suffers from a lot of health issues that I can see directly relates to his eating style. He's been on a low fat diet since the 80s when bloodwork showed his cholesterol over 200. He was a healthy 44 year old - lean, active. He has followed a low fat diet all these years very diligently and now he is 67. He has diabetes, high blood pressure, and dementia (so bad that he was diagnosed with Alzheimer's). His doctors are still prescribing these awful diets for him - low salt, low fat, with lots of glucerna supplements.

The biggest issue for my dad is his memory is so bad now that he doesn't remember conversations or books and can't stick to a new eating plan now. My mom is not much better because she was in a serious car accident 9 years ago and suffered a brain injury - so her ability to really conceptualize is gone. So they are functional for the most part, but can't learn new things.

I managed to get a few things across to them - simple changes to make. I explained the fallacy of low fat and I know it went over their heads, but they did take some suggestions on what to eat. So they now make eggs each morning for breakfast and often have protein salads for lunch. So, in a way, they didn't understand the "why" but were willing to hear about "what" to eat. My mom calls me to tell me that they're incorporating some things, like eggs for breakfast but then buys low-fat cookies to snack on because "they're healthy."

Baby steps, I guess.

I think the biggest lesson for me is that my parents are probably not going to change drastically. Not that they wouldn't when they were younger, but in many ways, it's too late for them. It's really sad for me to admit that, but I don't see my dad's health problems suddenly reversing...as much as I wish it were true. The most I can do is make myself healthy and teach my kids healthy eating and guide my parents in small ways.

[organicmidwestmama]

Originally Posted by berry987

I could have written this post (well, in terms of the diet stuff). I read Good Calories, Bad Calories a few months ago and it had a HUGE effect on me. And, as with you, my dad suffers from a lot of health issues that I can see directly relates to his eating style. He's been on a low fat diet since the 80s when bloodwork showed his cholesterol over 200. He was a healthy 44 year old - lean, active. He has followed a low fat diet all these years very diligently and now he is 67. He has diabetes, high blood pressure, and dementia (so bad that he was diagnosed with Alzheimer's). His doctors are still prescribing these awful diets for him - low salt, low fat, with lots of glucerna supplements...

I think the biggest lesson for me is that my parents are probably not going to change drastically. Not that they wouldn't when they were younger, but in many ways, it's too late for them. It's really sad for me to admit that, but I don't see my dad's health problems suddenly reversing...as much as I wish it were true. The most I can do is make myself healthy and teach my kids healthy eating and guide my parents in small ways.

i think your perspective is awesome, its realistic but not completely without hope. its really just sad to me that people are told to take all these meds and eat the wrong foods and then they get sicker and no one, as in no MD or nutritionist, they come into contact has the guts or intuition to question the status quo on the info they are dolling out.

[bagare]

No real advice either, but I am here to commiserate! My parents are much the same way and so is my MIL. Low fat, high carb yuck stuff. My MIL, who makes twice what my Dh and I do, lives on processed frozen food garbage and bags of neon orange crunch balls, refuses to buy any veg except carrots and won't cook because she thinks it dumb and stupid. The only cooking she does is to boil bags of beans with no salt, no meat, no onions, nothing and lets them cook to goo and eats that and complains that it tastes bad. I tried to get her to season them up or do something with them, but she is afraid of using any salt because she is afraid of getting heart disease. She drinks soy milk by the gallon and she is on total thyroid replacement. I tell her that soy is bad for her thyroid and she says so, I like the taste of soy milk and it is supposed to be healthy. Ugh! She would rather listen to what her neighbors bests friends boyfriends 5th cousin says about food rather then finding the truth. I gave her a copy of NT but she passed it on to a neighbor without even cracking the cover. *sigh*

My parents live on low fat high carb foods as well, other then sometimes they do eat spam, and complain that NT is far too fatty for them to follow. So they live on egg white scrambles, sugar free jello and sugar free cool whip, splenda laced, non fat 'ice cream', fat free half and half (what is the point!) and lots of crackers, pasta, rice etc. It is horrible every time we go for a visit, because with my diabetes, I am constantly being asked can you eat that? should you eat that? It isn't diet food! And I reiterate that I carb count, (2 units of Novolog (fast acting) insulin to 15 units carb) and that fats, real, healthy fats are good. Whole foods, chicken skin... the last holiday meal we had together, they had baked a turkey and I grabbed a big piece of crispy skin and my dad was all stop that! that is bad for you! **sigh**

I wish I could get them to see... my step grandfather lived to 104 and fried his bacon in lard because he felt that it was too lean. Lard on his toast, real cream in his coffee, eggs cooked in bacon grease...

OP, sounds like you have gotten some really awesome advice! And I am going to go check out those links myself!!

[JMJ]

Wow, your MIL sounds like a friend of mine who recently had to get all her teeth extracted: hates to cook so only eats at restaurants and TV dinners... even when she's unemployed and can't afford to have other people make her food. Oh, and she has IBS, so she was told to eliminate soy, whole grains, all fat, and most veggies. Soy and white flour are most of her diet now. <shudder>

With diabetes, I think that's where TF really makes sense. The fewer carbs you eat, the less you have to buy in insulin. Mmm... I'm craving crispy fat now. Too bad I roasted 2 chickens yesterday, so they'll last me a while, and it will be a bit before I roast more.

Another thing I'm finding helpful is talking about nourishing foods. I mean, soaking whole grains are good for everybody, same with kefir (even if it's from low-fat milk) and fermented veggies. You can also talk about how grassfed beef is lower in fat than normal beef and higher in omega 3's. Those are all politically correct things to talk about, and most people would do well if they switched to grassfed beef, wild salmon, soaked grains, and ate some ferments every once in a while. Remember that Dr. Price's experiment with feeding 1 nourishing meal to underpriveleged kids made a big difference even though they were eating junk other times.