Preschool end-of-year...shoes

[lemurik]

Both of my kids are going to be performing at the end-of-year performance in their preschool. We have been asked to get DS black shoes (completely black - no other color) and DD white shoes or sandals. Here is the problem...DS has really light black See Kai Run sandals (he has been wearing them for a while, but they are a good fit and he is really comfortable in them). His teacher doesn't want us to use them, I guess because they are not dressy enough. He doesn't have a need for dress shoes other than for that occasion. Same thing for DD, although her teacher might be more relaxed about it (haven't shown her the sandals we have yet).
I don't want kids to feel left out when everyone else will be wearing dress shoes, but I also don't really want to spend extra money for something they will probably never wear later - given I recently got them shoes for the summer and they will likely need new sizes for the fall.
So...what would you do?
Any recommendations on cheap (but decent quality) shoes would be great too.
Thanks

[Starflower]

Are you on any email lists where you could look for some shoes to borrow for the event? Or you could try some thrift shops - they can be hit and miss, but maybe you could find some dress shoes that would look OK with some polish.

I wouldn't want to buy new dress shoes for this either since they won't wear them again. Good luck.

[lilyka]

Why do you need decent quality shoes if they are only going to wear them once? Why not just get something cheap that will get you though the event? I vote that you go to payless, walmart or a second hand store (Really, you can't be the only person who has been forced to buy dress shoes for a single occaision) and just pick up something cheap that will get you through the preformance. Especially if you know you will never wear them again. then pass them on to the next mother who has to buy dress shoes her kid will never wear again.

[One_Girl]

A thrift store or payless may have some cheap shoes that are decent enough for a one time occassion. When this has come up with dd I tell her that we can't afford the one time expense but that we can afford to go to the bakery at our grocery store to get a single serving slice of cake (which is easily big enough for two people) to celebrate afterwards. She is just fine with having the cake instead of the shoes and it saves a lot of money.

[noobmom]

I'd be tempted to use the shoes you have because 1) it's a waste otherwise, 2) it's ridiculous that teacher/school would even make that kind of request, 3) no one, really, NO ONE will notice if the shoes are dark grey instead of black. However, I also know that as a child my mom had to "make do" with these types of requests and it always made me embarrassed. I was just a stickler for "the rules" even when the rules weren't really rules.

So, I guess if I were in your situation, I'd buy the cheapest black shoes I could find (thrift or megmart) or maybe ask around your friends and see if anyone has a pair you could borrow. If you have to buy them new I would buy BIG and hope they fit for next year's program too.

[Peony]

Eh, I'd just go with the shoes you have. I would not buy shoes for a PRE-SCHOOL show. DD1's school had a huge X-Mas play, they needed to wear black shoes, she doesn't own any and I certainly wasn't going to buy any, she wore black socks, and no one cared.

[Stephenie]

No way would I buy new shoes for this. If I happened to see some at a thrift shop, maybe, but the teacher is being unreasonable if you as me.

[lilyka]

also since it is just for a program I wouldn't worry about how well they fit either. He could probably get by with some borrowed ones even if they were a size or two too big. also if you happen to have an old pair of shoes and some black spray paint.....

[leighi123]

I saw some at walmart today for $7, and I saw some at JcPenny for $10. And I saw some somewhere else but I forget where! My ds is going to need some for an event so I have been looking.


In your situation though, I'd probably not bother to get any, and would have just shown up with the ones he already has on. Would the teacher tell him he couldnt participate if his shoes were the wrong shade of black? That would be weird.

[lemurik]

The sandals are completely black (by light I meant weight-not color). The problem with them is they are not dress shoes, but sandals. Weight/fit is important, as DS will not be able to wear something too heavy/bad fitting. Thank you for the tips on where to look. I will try to find something reasonable. If not - will have to go with the sandals.

[annethcz]

Are you kidding me? It's PRESCHOOL!!! No, I wouldn't buy special shoes to wear for a preschool program- and I'm a preschool teacher

[aprons_and_acorns]

Originally Posted by Stephenie

No way would I buy new shoes for this. If I happened to see some at a thrift shop, maybe, but the teacher is being unreasonable if you as me.

My thoughts exactly. Although knowing me I probably would buy the shoes just to avoid the teacher's ire, and then be resentful. (I'm working on that!) I have no idea what kind of preschool it is or what the usual expectations are for the programs, but a request like that seems more appropriate for an elective-type recital (dance class, choir, etc.) or for older students, like jr. high or high school.

Besides, these are preschoolers putting on a show! No one is going to notice their shoes, they will all be looking at their sweet little faces.

[cschick]

Originally Posted by lemurik

Both of my kids are going to be performing at the end-of-year performance in their preschool. We have been asked to get DS black shoes (completely black - no other color) and DD white shoes or sandals. Here is the problem...DS has really light black See Kai Run sandals (he has been wearing them for a while, but they are a good fit and he is really comfortable in them). His teacher doesn't want us to use them, I guess because they are not dressy enough. He doesn't have a need for dress shoes other than for that occasion. Same thing for DD, although her teacher might be more relaxed about it (haven't shown her the sandals we have yet).
I don't want kids to feel left out when everyone else will be wearing dress shoes, but I also don't really want to spend extra money for something they will probably never wear later - given I recently got them shoes for the summer and they will likely need new sizes for the fall.
So...what would you do?
Any recommendations on cheap (but decent quality) shoes would be great too.
Thanks

Since you say they will probably need new shoes for the fall . . . buy your son a decent pair of black shoes the next size up?

Lands End has some black all-weather mocs in kids sizes 9-13 for $9.99. I can tell you that these shoes survive just about anything . . . and especially brand-new, they look pretty dressy but are comfortable and durable enough to be daily wear. (And my kid who has issues with other shoes just loves them so much that I have them in the next 3 sizes he'll wear.)

http://www.landsend.com/pp/WeatherMo...7&origin=index

Edited: if you're interested, I also private messaged you a free shipping code.

[eepster]

I don't get why they need to fit well for such a brief event. I would buy a pair of comfortable black sneakers (say something like these) in the size you think he will be next fall. Have him wear his regular shoe till just before the event, and change him back into the regular shoe as soon as it was over. A half an hour in slightly too big shoes shouldn't be a big deal, it's not like he'll be running around anyway.

I might go with the sandals if they weren't too open. I would put black socks under them (The Children's Place carries them.)

I must add, that I think it's an extremely annoying request. Preschoolers out grow shoes way to quickly to buy pairs for special events. It's not like you can put them away and expect them to still fit for the next event that comes along. For them to be so picky that they have to be black shoes is really over the top, what if I had really nice brown dress shoes for my DS already from some other event, then I would end up with 2 pair that would only be worn once. I would not be buying dress shoes.

[Vancouver Mommy]

Consignment stores are filled with tiny dress shoes that have been worn only a handful of times. I would be more likely to borrow in this situation though. The whole thing sounds pretty annoying for a preschool concert.

[peaceful_mama]

I agree with that being an annoying request, given that kids outgrow them so quickly!

I'd look at a large thrift store if you've got one (like a Once Upon a Child) just becuase they'd be most likely to have something. Then other thrift. Or borrowing/freecycle. I would seriously---of course this might depend on where you live!--but where I live, I would not pay even 10 bucks for a pair. *maybe* 6-7 And here, I'd likely find something less than $5 but given the 'rush' of this search, I wouldn't hold myself 'down' to that.

[claras_mom]

Originally Posted by Peony

Eh, I'd just go with the shoes you have. I would not buy shoes for a PRE-SCHOOL show. DD1's school had a huge X-Mas play, they needed to wear black shoes, she doesn't own any and I certainly wasn't going to buy any, she wore black socks, and no one cared.

Originally Posted by Stephenie

No way would I buy new shoes for this. If I happened to see some at a thrift shop, maybe, but the teacher is being unreasonable if you as me.

Originally Posted by annethcz

Are you kidding me? It's PRESCHOOL!!! No, I wouldn't buy special shoes to wear for a preschool program- and I'm a preschool teacher

:

I wouldn't do it. Black socks; black socks with sandals maybe....but not new (or even thrifted, because that actually takes more time, which is also valuable) shoes for one time.

[Girlprof]

Try Freecycle. Or friends with older kids who might still have the old shoes kicking around. Though personally, I'd just go with whatever you have.

[mojumi]

I wouldn't buy new shoes for a preschool end-of-year show if we weren't going to be buying shoes anyway. (Give me a break!!) I can understand asking that kids be dressed neatly and nicely (no shorts or no logo t-shirts, that kind of thing), or in uniform if school has a uniform, but asking for specific colors of new dress shoes for a preschool show ... I would just ignore it, or else point out that it is an unreasonable request that I intended to ignore.

.02

[Drummer's Wife]

I can't imagine you'd be the only one with a kid w/o the perfect pair of black shoes. Silly that the teacher is that picky. If my preschooler had black shoes already, or it wasn't a big deal to grab a pair before the performance - then he'd wear them. Otherwise, I wouldn't give it a second thought and would send him in whatever shoes he had.