Do lo's go to preschool in the US?

[Plarka]

Not sure this is the right place to post.

I live in the UK and there is such pressure to send your kid to preschool, or 'nursery' as they call it, from a young age. Most of my friends have sent theirs from around 2, and everyone definitely sends them from 3. The government gives you a grant at 3 and it's free! I don't want to send mine, and everytime I see certain friends of mine, they always give me the 'you should send her to nursery' schpeel!!! I'm sooo sick of it!

I'm American, grew up in the US, and it was never like this. We went to kindergarten at 5 and only if parents worked, the kid went to daycare. What's it like now? Is there this nursery/preschool pressure?

Not to mention, dd knows waaaaay more than these nursery kids, that I've taught her myself at home. And we do plenty of socializing at playgroups and with individual friends.

[SagMom]

Originally Posted by Plarka

I'm American, grew up in the US, and it was never like this. .

It WASN'T like this, but it sure is now! At least, it is where I live. Tremendous pressure to send kids to pre-school. Some people have their newborns on waiting lists for the "right" school, and some preschools have interview processes because, if you don't get into the right preschool, then you won't get into the right elementary or prep and then your chances of getting into the ivy leagues will be lost and your life will be ruined. (Read that with as much snark as you can manage.)

[lyterae]

Where I live there are preschools, but I haven't had any pressure for it. However, I am a WOHM and DD will be going to preschool in fall (she will be 4.5) 3 half-days a week, and daycare for the rest of the time during the week while I work. This is mostly to help prepare her for Kindergarten. I know a lot of people who have thier children in preschool for two years and I just didn't think it was neccesary.

If I was still able to stay at home we would be homeschooling, but I hadn't planned on starting formal schooling until she was closer to 6.

[4Blessings]

Yep, lots of pressure to rush our children into the hands of the educational system.

We are happy and thriving at home TYVM

[skueppers]

Where I live, most families have two parents working outside the home, so kids are usually in daycare or with a nanny from early on, and then go to preschool five days a week, all day long, at 2 or 3.

Parents pay for this themselves.

Among families with a stay at home parent, kids in this area usually go to preschool two or three days a week at age 3, increasing the number of days as they get older.

[puddleduck]

It is true most people send their DC to preschool from 2 or 3 in the UK. I joined a local home ed group when my DS1 was about 3, there are always younger siblings to play with and now he has a great group of friends.

[lach]

When I was a kid, everyone sent their kids to preschool. I don't know if I know anyone who didn't go to preschool. Maybe it was a regional thing? I grew up in CA, RI, NJ, and MA and preschool was definitely the norm in all of those places.

I'm in MA now and I don't know anyone who doesn't send their kids to preschool when they're 3 and 4. We did one better and started a Montessori program at age 2. Most people I know think I was weird for doing that, but it's been great for her.

[MJB]

I went to preschool starting at 3 in the US.
I didn't send my oldest son (now 7) to preschool or kindergarten and didn't feel pressured to do so by anyone. We sent him to 1st grade this year (at 6.5) and may or may not send him to school next year.

[elizawill]

yes, preschool is HUGE here. where i live it is very uncommon to keep your child home until kindergarten. preschool is very academic in my area, and K4 is also very popular (to prepare you for kindergarten).

[laohaire]

When I grew up here in the US in the 70's, preschool was not so common, though certainly hardly unheard of. My mom sent me. It was an "enrichment" activity kind of thing, though, not a daycare and certainly not an all-day situation.

I was pretty surprised when I learned last year that our town has a public preschool. We actually did send DD to it, though we still planned to homeschool - as a "fun" activity, that's all. DD loves playing with kids and she loves to paint and all that good preschool stuff. (We pulled her out later because she didn't want to go anymore).

Yes, we find that there is an expectation that she be in preschool, and a lot of surprise if people find out she isn't.

[kittie313]

All the time I get that pressure. I've been getting it since dd1 was old enough for the 2yo preschool program at our old town, when I announced that she was NOT going to be going there. i just continue to ignore it and keep teaching my 2yo the things she's learning, she's working on her ABCs by sight and their sounds now.

[One_Girl]

A lot of kids go to preschool in the US. There is pressure to stay home with your kid if you send them to preschool and pressure to get out and work or at least send your kid to preschool if you stay home. I think you should do what you feel is right given your situation and your knowledge of your child's needs.

[kittywitty]

Originally Posted by SagMom

It WASN'T like this, but it sure is now! At least, it is where I live. Tremendous pressure to send kids to pre-school. Some people have their newborns on waiting lists for the "right" school, and some preschools have interview processes because, if you don't get into the right preschool, then you won't get into the right elementary or prep and then your chances of getting into the ivy leagues will be lost and your life will be ruined. (Read that with as much snark as you can manage.)

Yup. Around here, if you have money, there is the private school pre-school program, everyone else does "Head Start" which is a public program supposed to be for low income/at risk kids, but everyone goes just about. None of my kids have ever gone. I didn't go when I was younger, either. Nor did my brothers who are just now high school/college age.

[Phoenix~Mama]

There is a lot of pressure to send kids to preschool here now. Especially as the curriculum of kindergaten is more like the curriculum I remember from 1st grade.

I know of several kids that did not go to preschool and are now struggling in kindy and having to repeat.

My DSD went to preschool since 3 and is still having to repeat kindy.

[MrsJewelsRae]

I'm in Ontario Canada. It is more common in the bigger cities I think. We live in a small town and it's not as common, likely because there's a much higher SAHM population. In 2 working parent families pre-school is the norm anywhere now I believe. Among my Christian friends, most of whom use the public school system, none of them sent their kids to preschool. However, if your child has speech delays and is with a SAHM, small home daycare, or a nanny- it gets blamed on lack of socialization and they are quickly given the prescription for preschool (never dealt with it personally, but knew several people this happened to). I can't help but roll my eyes internally (no offense to anyone here intended) when I see moms online who talk about how their 1-2 year love school- umm, they are BABIES.

There was definitely as big push for K4 here though, JK intake here is 3 years old! We were bombarded by everyone when my oldest turned 4 "when is starting kindy?" So if you turn 4 before the end of the school year you are eligible to start. Far too young IMO.

Yep, lots of pressure to rush our children into the hands of the educational system.

We are happy and thriving at home TYVM

ITA!

[sbgrace]

It's very common in my town. I don't know anyone else in my social circle (outside of my closest friend who moved) who didn't preschool. In our town I know the non preschool kids were put in full day K (opposed to half day) when I was a teacher (this would be 7 to 9 years ago). Now all kids do full day K and the ones not ready for school, which I gathered includes anyone who didn't do preschool, must start their K year early.

However, there isn't the government involvement/input in preschool education that there is (as I understand it) in the UK. So while it's socially standard in many areas I suspect the atmosphere is still different than what you're experiencing.

[OkiMom]

Im a American but I live in Japan. Its very common to start sending your children to preschool around 18 months over here. I have been being asked since DD1 was around a year when she was starting and where I was going to send her. Now she is 3 and everyone wants to know if she will start the preschool offered on base in the fall. People think its a real bummer that she missed the cutoff (the cut off is in September and she doesn't turn 4 until January) and don't understand when I tell them she won't be attending preschool at all. After all the school is free and the bus picks them up at your front door and drops them off at your front door, they are gone from 8am-3pm 5 days a week so it gives you tons of free time etc. Its sad to me that people are so eager to send their children to school. My babies are thriving at home. My oldest might not be interested in learning her alphabet right now but she can tell you all about cooking, measuring, numbers almost to 50 and gardening. Shes three, she has plenty of time to learn her letters.

[34me]

My mom was a SAHM and I started Kindergarten. No pre school for me . I'm a WOHM and my guys went to preschool instead of day care.

[kittie313]

Sorry, I have to comment again. I get pressured to send mine to preschool, and currently my 4yo is signed up for Head Start (she has speech delays) but I'm thinking of withdrawing her. I just don't like the idea of her going to school from 8-11:30am 4 days a week and having breakfastand lunch that I can't pack (she has a lot of food allergies and this REALLY makes me nervous, considering how she responds to having soy) there every day and I'm not allowed to sign a form that she'll be skipping these meals, she HAS to eat there.

But I was a little kid in the 80's, and I entered preschool at 3yo. It was a private school for the profoundly gifted, and at 3yo I had done all their K stuff and they were scramblingto find material for me to keep me busy. It was a full-day program (8am-3pm plus childcare before and after, I was there 6a-6p) and my parents were separated (lived with my dad, they divorced when I was 4 1/2yo) I loved preschool, mainly because it got me away from my home with my parents fighting all the time and I was able to pursue stuff that really interested me (when my dad could no longer afford the school and put me in ps for 1st grade, I was reading high school level books and doing pre-algebra) But I remember asking my mom a few years ago about why I was sent to preschool then, and to a toddler playschool program before that, and she said it was because it was expeced of her even then. She and my dad wanted her to be a sahm but she was 19 when she had me and she had no clue what to do or how to stand up for what she wanted. My dad had an unhealthy attachment to his mom and was easily swayed by her, so when she decided it was time for me to start school she started working on him and got him to believe that I needed to go at a year old, then he started talking to my mom and bullying her about it. So she sent me, and yes I did thrive and I was happy and it was a good thing for me (especialy as an only child) but she said she hated it and missed me every moment I was gone. She LOVED that I stuck to my guns and refused to send my oldest 2 to preschool, and thinks I should do the same for dd3 and dd4. She's not so big on me hsing AFTER preschool, but she thinks pre-k is a total waste of time and easily done at home.

[cappuccinosmom]

Yep.

In our area, people started asking me when I was sending my children to school--when my kids were 2-3 years old.

Not only is there a lot of pressure to put them in school, but what used to be daycare for toddlers has been renamed "school", thus making one look like a bad parent when you take your kids out during the day and the toddlers are "not in school".