How do people switch to HB last moment when I'm having trouble at 21 weeks??

[sattygirl99]

I likely have to switch providers due to finances (DH is enlisting in the military and we will more than likely have tricare) and I'm due in September... Both MW's I know that take tricare say they are full!

I want to know how people switch from OB to HB at 30 plus weeks when I can't find a new HB MW at 21 weeks??? I don't get it!

Mini rant... Just kind of frustrated.

[dachshundqueen]

In some areas, access to HB MW's is so limited that they fill up fast and I mean fill up such that as soon as some people get a positive pregnancy test they call the midwife to make sure they get a spot. That may be the case in your area.

Liz

[sattygirl99]

We actually have quite a few midwives... like 7 or 8 that practice in the area... Only a few take tricare though and I can't afford to pay out of pocket after some serious loss of work between the snow last year (I'm in MD, we got hammered in the winter!) and time off from work for illness.

I found one who's full but said shed take me on but has concerns about working with me because I have/had reservations in the beginning when I first interviewed her (she doesn't have a ton of VBAC/VBMAC experience and it freaked me out, now it doesn't bother it as much really because I know that experience isn't all that makes a great provider great and then I was really scared of having a CNM after my experience with my daughter, not so much now). I'm waiting to hear back from one other and I thought about contacting the other MW that takes tricare directly and seeing if given the situation, maybe she'd take me on too (I only talked to the receptionist but maybe the MW might make an exception and take me on anyway).

It just strikes me as odd that people can switch to HB weeks before they are due and I'm sitting here facing having little choice but to fight for my VBA2C in a hospital with a midwifery practice (which is an hour drive without traffice, I'm SOL if it's rush hour) and have to give up on not doing any testing.

Needed to vent... lol.

[Eresh]

Sheer luck. Seriously. I switched at 30 weeks with DS to a practice of CNMs that is the type that fills up very quickly you do need to call as soon as you get a positive pregnancy test. And they carry a waiting list for when a spot opens up for whatever reason. I just lucked out when I called. They had no waiting list and at least one spot open for my due month. Then I went and had the baby in the "wrong month" along with half of the other moms in my due month.

[Maluhia]

It is sheer luck and your situation is not all that uncommon. Can you pay out of pocket and get partial reimbursement through Tricare afterwards? Even if providers "don't take" tricare it does not always mean that tricare won't reimburse you for 80% or something like that. Out-of-network provider is what you'd be working with. Also, what about a short-term loan from your bank to be paid off when your husband is working in the military with a more steady paycheck?

[sattygirl99]

No, I can't pay out of pocket... If I could, I wouldn't be looking to leave my current MW, who I love but can't afford to pay because of finances (my husband missed three weeks of work due to illness in March, unpaid because of no sick time. That was over a $2000 loss that we still haven't exactly recovered from).

We don't have good enough credit for a loan (I tried) and no credit cards. I asked my IL's for a loan and was told by my father in law that 'his money is better spent elsewhere and my midwife is not a priority bill' and to 'do whatever was paid for by insurance and who gives a damn if it's another c-section'. My parents are in their own financial mess and my grandmother was laid off a few months ago. My aunt lives with my grandmother and doesn't work and my great grandma has been gone for several years. So I only had one option for getting a loan and FIL is being a jerk about it all (including saying he won't help to cover any of the lapse in pay when DH goes into the military if we're paying a midwife so I 'better not be'... Ha, what he doesn't know, certainly doesn't hurt him)

Sorry if I'm snappy, its been a rough, emotional week dealing with my FIL and I go through this with a lot of people. Loans are not easy to obtain, neither are credit cards. And when you aren't completely 100% stable (as in, still playing catch up) from a huge lapse in pay, it's not a wise choice to make in taking on debt you can't pay. I even tried to refinance the van (which is our only line of credit we have and was hard as crap to get, with a 22% interest rate) but I can't until the loan is 18 months old, which isn't until January. The answer is always 'you can make it work, take out a loan' and it's not always that easy. I know I'm not the only one out there who has no resources, no extras (we don't even have cable or a house phone to save money) who goes through this too.

Thanks to everyone... ! I guess it really is luck... And I suppose some areas are better for that than others. Oh well, it'll work out sooner or later, somehow... Maybe I just need to put myself on a waiting list and do my own prenatal care for now. Im waiting to hear back from my MW too in seeing if there's anything we may be able to work out so that I don't have to switch away from her, as I really do love her and want to continue working with her!

[dannic]

Hugs, mama...that is tough! We planned this pregnancy knowing things would be tight, TIGHT! and it's been hard at times. I live in an area with no midwives so I have to import one from 2 hrs away. And I totally worried that she'd be full by the time I was pregnant! I called her ahead of time and told her I thought I was pregnant but wouldn't know for another week, lol.

Some areas are just tougher than others. But things can work out! I'd put myself on all the waiting lists, cut out any unnecessary expenses (like going out to eat, texting, ect....) and pray!

I'm sorry that your FIL is being so rude to you. I hope you have some people you can lean on to support you through this tough time!

[Climbergirl]

Poo on your FIL. Like he should be that much in your business. How would he feel if you had a c-section and then had a major complication from it?????

So sorry, hope one of the midwives works out for you....

[laughingfox]

I think one of the reasons people can find a midwife later in pregnancy is that some women get "risked out" of homebirth for pre-e, severe GD, etc. late in pregnancy, and midwives' schedules open up.

I hope things work out for you with finding a covered midwife, and I'm sorry your FIL is being so rude and condescending about it all.

[micah_mae_]

I haven't switched yet, I wonder if Joey is full up? I was hoping to have some other midwives and maybe even an OB look at my records due to my blood issue with Corbin, I am worried that the explosion of blood might have been a partial abruption that had clotted.

[sattygirl99]

Micah - I would check and see... Being that you're only a month behind me, you may end up in the same boat (Except that you can always deliver at SB if you wanted... I don't get that choice!). Remember too, that even if it was a partial abruption, that doesn't mean it will happen again and home birth MW's can handle it the same as the SB midwives do in the birth center.

You would have to email or call Joey and ask her... I emailed her back and asked her if we could do a face to face interview (as opposed to over the phone or email) but I'm concerned that now she's uncomfortable with ME (and not the other way around, as my fears had me in the beginning).

Thanks to everyone! I did get an email back from my current MW and we're going to submit to my current insurance and see where that will leave us (I think we're submitting per prenatal visit so we at least get prenatal coverage). So I may not have to switch after all! I'm crossing my fingers that given that they've always known finances are rough (they just got rougher with DH missing work) and I've always been honest, that it will all work out!

[micah_mae_]

Originally Posted by sattygirl99

Micah - I would check and see... Being that you're only a month behind me, you may end up in the same boat (Except that you can always deliver at SB if you wanted... I don't get that choice!). Remember too, that even if it was a partial abruption, that doesn't mean it will happen again and home birth MW's can handle it the same as the SB midwives do in the birth center.

True, do you think I could request a specific mw if I do have to go to sb? Like..instead of whoever is on call?

[sattygirl99]

In my experience... No. When I spoke with David about my issues with Joann, he told me I would 'have to deal with whoever was on call at the time of labor'. I have been told you can refuse to work with a certain MW but the back up MW (ie, third call) has to agree to come in and they don't HAVE to.

That's how I ended up delivering with Joann despite knowing well before birth she was NOT the best midwife for me. I didn't fight it at the time because I was told to 'deal' by the head MW (David) when I brought up my issues.

Absolutely talk to the midwives about your concerns. They will NOT take you on as a homebirth client if they feel you aren't fit due to past or present history. So, you should feel confident in that...