Overnight PL-ing

[Wild Lupine]

A few months ago DH heard that the neighbor's daughter stays dry overnight. They said they just put her in undies, take her to the bathroom about an hour or two after she goes to sleep, and she stays dry.

DH decided to try this with our DD (3 1/2). About half the time, maybe less, she stays dry. The rest is spent changing PJ's in the middle of the night, sometimes sheets, sometimes more than once. DD is a deep sleeper and I think she just doesn't/can't wake up when she needs to pee.

This has been going on for about three months. She doesn't seem to be having dry nights any more frequently now than when DH started this. It's interfering with all of our sleep. I'm wondering whether to continue with this or switch her back to some kind of night time training pants. I'm not sure which would be worse for DD at this point, to 'go back' to what she associates with something younger kids do (wear trainers at night) or keep having her try to stay dry and fail. Se doesn't seem to be emotionally disappointed or embarrassed when she's wet, but she has been very excited when she's dry.

Any suggestions. Oh yeah, we do limit her liquid intake in the evening.

[alfabetsoup]

I don't think being dry at night is something that can be learned. DD1 was dry at night very soon after she PL'd (late) and some of her friends who'd been PL'd for a while stayed in nighttime pullups for a long time. I would stop pushing it personally.

Here's a tip for nighttime cleanups: make the bed twice, waterproof sheet, regularsheet, waterproof sheet, regular sheet. keep a clean blanket to hand, and when you have to change the sheets, just whip the top ones off and pull out the clean blanket (if necessary.)

[kennedy444]

My dd is 5.5 and is never dry overnight (and has been out of daytime diapers since she was under 3!). I've tried the whole sleepwalking her to the bathroom, limiting fluids, etc. Nope, still wet in the morning. I think a full night sleep with diaper (or whatever on) is better than getting everyone up in the middle of the night to change pjs, sheets, etc. No thanks.

I've come to realize, "so what if she wears a diaper to bed" it really won't last forever....and we all sleep well!

[cjam]

I am of the opinion that you can't control the timing of night-time dryness any more than you can control the timing of her teeth coming in. It's not in the child's control. There's nothing wrong with wearing pull ups to bed for as long as a child needs them.

[lyterae]

DD is 4 and does not stay dry overnight yet. Right now she goes to bed around 8:00, I take her the bathroom around 10:30 or 11 and about 90% of the time she will still be dry in the morning.

I'm perfectly fine with pull-ups and letting her sleep and not waking her, however, she is presently adamantly against wearing pull-ups of any kind.

[AllisonR]

Originally Posted by cjam

I am of the opinion that you can't control the timing of night-time dryness any more than you can control the timing of her teeth coming in. It's not in the child's control. There's nothing wrong with wearing pull ups to bed for as long as a child needs them.

Agreed. I have a DS who is a deep sleeper. He specifically asked for no diapers at night a little before age 4. About 2 nights a week he slept right through, peed in the bed, and just kept on sleeping until morning. Over several months he got better at getting up at night, pee, go right back to sleep. He has not had any accidents in at least a year.

DD is a light sleeper. We got rid of diapers at night on literally the exact same day she asked to switch to daytime underwear. She never once wet the bed. She just wakes up too easily and cries she needs to pee and one of us goes in and helps her to the toilet.

[ProtoLawyer]

My stepdaughter stayed dry at night through the method you mentioned--we also would take her to the bathroom if she wanted to come in with us (sometimes, she'd end up, crying on the toilet while peeing profusely, that she didn't need to go).

But I think the previous posters are correct--it's development more than anything. If their bodies can signal to them that they need to get up and go, then the undies method might make sense--keeping them in pull-ups/diapers might provide an incentive for them to just wet instead of get up. But if they're not ready, they're not ready.

FWIW, we found limiting liquids did absolutely no good--she'd have dry nights after drinking gallons of water, wet nights after restrictions--and just made my SD miserable. (She'd try to suck water out of her washcloth before bed if we didn't let her have a drink.) YMMV.

[Alyantavid]

Yeah you can't really teach them to stay dry all night. With my oldest, he wore diapers at night for about 2 weeks after he was potty trained. My youngest wore diapers at night for a good year and a half after he was potty trained.

Now, he's nearly 4 and we do take him potty about 2 hours after he went to bed and he stays dry all night.

ETA: before we discovered this particular way, we did consider putting him back in diapers at night and he was adamantly (screaming, crying) against it. He did not want to wear diapers anymore period. So we tried this.

[~Charlie's~Angel~]

I just skimmed the responses, and I agree that I dont think staying dry at night is something that can be learned or taught. It has to do with their bodies development. Their bladders are still so little. I would continue some kind of nighttime diaper/pullup until shes stays dry consistantly. It may be a long time. it could be next week. . Im prepared for it.

[4evermom]

There is some kind of night time hormonal thing that makes most people not usually have to urinate while they are sleeping. Different bodies mature enough to do that at different ages. Not much you can do about night time dryness with kids.

From Wikipedia:

"Two physical functions prevent bedwetting. The first is a hormone that reduces urine production at night. The second is the ability to wake up when the bladder is full. Children usually achieve nighttime dryness by developing one or both of these abilities. There appear to be some hereditary factors in how and when these develop.

The first ability is a hormone cycle that reduces the body's urine production. At about sunset each day, the body releases a minute burst of antidiuretic hormone (also known as arginine vasopressin or AVP). This hormone burst reduces the kidney's urine output well into the night so that the bladder does not get full until morning. This hormone cycle is not present at birth. Many children develop it between the ages of two and six years old, others between six and the end of puberty, and some not at all. "

[Peony]

My first child was dry at night and out of dipes by the time she was 2. DD2 is 3.5y and SOAKS a diaper at night, once in a while DH will forgot to put one on her and we end up with a sopping wet bed, she is no way ready to be dry at ngiht. I totally agree that it is milestone that there is no set age on.

[lonegirl]

I think every child is different. We did EC with DS since 8m and from shortly after a year he was dry overnight (I switched him to pullups at that time). I started a night time routine which includes brushing teeth and having a night time pee. Then first thing in the morning he always has a pee. As we cosleep I found it easier....for the first little while if he seemed to toss and squirm a lot at night I would bring him to the bathroom and put him on the potty for him to pee half awake. Then bring him back to bed and he would sleep well the rest of the night. I think in the past 2 years we may have had 3 accidents over night. If he has to pee at night he lets me know (we still cosleep). He switched to big boy undies about 6 months ago but before that his pullups were bone dry (he was reluctant to switch as he was worried about having an accident)

[broodymama]

Both my 3.5 year old and 5.5 year old still wear Pull Ups at night (Good Nites for my 5 yo, since he really needs the absorbency). Yes, it would definitely be nice to have them at underwear at night, but physiologically they aren't ready for it yet. They both know that when their bodies are ready, they will wake up to pee at night. I think it will happen for DD1 before it happens for DS, he sleeps so deeply.

[NiteNicole]

My daughter has been dry at night since she was about 18 months old (maybe a little before)...but she wouldn't potty train till she was 3.5. I agree with everyone else, night time dryness is developmental, NOT learned.

[IntrovertExtrovert]

I'm jumping on the "it's development/biological" bandwagon. My kiddo also was dry at night several months before he even started peeing on the toilet.

[One_Girl]

Some kids are dry at night before other kids, but almost all kids eventually move to nighttime dryness. My dd PL'd very easily at two and a half, but she wore night diapers for about a month after then was fine switching to underwear after a few accidents the first week. I didn't even get her up to pee at night. I don't think sleeping soundly has anything to do with this issue because my dd and I are both very heavy sleepers, she sleeps through alarm clocks. I think that it is more to do with the bladder and it sounds like her bladder isn't ready to go all night. I think you should put her in a night diaper if it is becoming a problem and try again when she is four.

[treeoflife3]

I was still having accidents at 10 or 11 years old. In fact, I was put on medication to help it although with what I know now that my mom and doctor must not have, I tihnk it was completely pointless.

Maybe you could get her some really pretty WAHM made trainers off hyenacart? If she developmentally isn't able to get through every night dry, she might instead really like having special underwear that she gets to help pick out. It isn't little baby pull ups, but it will help keep her bed and pajamas dry so she can still feel like a big kid without having to help clean up messes all the time.

[busymama77]

Originally Posted by cjam

I am of the opinion that you can't control the timing of night-time dryness any more than you can control the timing of her teeth coming in. It's not in the child's control. There's nothing wrong with wearing pull ups to bed for as long as a child needs them.

I agree. We're dealing with the same thing with our ODS - 4yo. He can be dry for 4 nights in a row and as soon as we try out the undies, he has an accident. His ped said that if he's dry 6 out of 7 nights to give it a try - we tried that, too - two nights he was dry and the third night, he had an accident. It'll happen eventually and we're not too concerned about it. We, too, limit the liquid intake and encourage him to go before bed. If he doesn't feel the urge to then that's fine.

[WildinTheory]

Originally Posted by IntrovertExtrovert

I'm jumping on the "it's development/biological" bandwagon. My kiddo also was dry at night several months before he even started peeing on the toilet.

Absolutely. We're still working on potty learning with my 3 1/2 year old DS but he hasn't worn a diaper at night for almost three weeks and has only wet the bed twice. It is actually helping us with the potty learning as he's getting into the habit of going before bed and once he wakes up, but he's way closer to being dry all night, than all day.

[~cassie]

Yep, I'm also of the opinion that it can't be learned. My oldest wore pullups til 4 and he stopped having accidents. He still has one every now and again. My middle son has been dry at night since about 18 mths and wears underwear to bed now at 2 1/2 and maybe once every 2-3 weeks will have an accident.