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single mamas in school - Page 2

post #21 of 32
I go to school full time and have a 1 yr old daughter. She goes to daycare while I´m in class, and I pick her up about 1 hr after my last class (to be able to do homework, etc). She´s usually in daycare about 5 hrs a day, and when I go pick her up she doesn´t want to leave she loves it so much. Visitations with her dad take place when I am in lab. Being a full time student and single parent, it just doesn´t make sense in my situation to find a job. I want to see my daughter grow up, and the little money that I would be able to bring in just doesn´t justify the time I would spend away from her. So I live solely from my financial aid package, which includes loans, grants, and scholarships. I live on-campus in family apartments. We are definitely poor; I qualify for food stamps - but we are happy and spend lots of quality time together. This summer I didn´t get enough financial aid to cover my expenses. So my little one and I are spending the summer in Spain with my Mother. Here, I have no expenses and we get to spend time with Grandma. <3
You can definitely live off of your financial aid package as long as you don´t mind being poor. I don´t mind it at all because it feels like we are doing the right thing: getting an education + spending time with my little one.
I wish you the best with whatever you choose to do!
post #22 of 32
Just saw this thread and thought I'd rejoin the ranks a bit.

I'm a full-time nursing student in a ridiculously crazy accelerated BSN program that is trying to kill even those students who don't have kids.

We live on student loans (and a line of credit for students in professional fields). I am acquiring debt at an astonishing rate, but I don't care because the end is in sight and I know that my current skills at being cheap will pay off as we continue to live on our current budget and I use the excess to pay off loans. I also have daycare subsidy and we qualify for various programs for low income families. I qualify for bursaries and grants. I apply for everything possible and have no shame about laying out my entire sordid story in hopes of an extra $500 scholarship.

My kiddos have learned that Mommy is just really busy. A few months ago, I had to just put school on hold emotionally, and tend to them, even though I couldn't really afford to, they needed it more. I'm trying to avoid to getting to that point again.

We make plans for what we'll do, and look forward to that. When Mommy has a break between terms (my program is 23 months straight, but with a few weeks between terms usually), we go on weekend trips and value the time together. I've promised them a trip to Disneyland when we're ALL done with this because it's been a family affair. And we WILL go, even if it's the last thing I put on that line of credit.

I try really hard to make the time between daycare pick-up and bedtime just about them. I don't look at my homework, I don't do housework, I just do their homework and we eat dinner and we go outside and play, and I take them to their extra-curricular activities, etc. They know that I expect them to stay in bed at night because THAT'S my homework time, though.

If I'm home during a day that I have a weird class schedule, I sometimes pick up one child from daycare or school (I have 3 kids) and we do a special lunch, just the two of us. It makes the busy weeks more bearable.

My budgeting skills probably aren't useful to you, as I'm in Canada and the prices are greatly different (for example, my rent is $1295, and daycare, if it wasn't subsidized, would be $1925/month), but you learn where you CAN afford to cut corners (eat out less?) and where you can't (for me, I've got full cable, DVR and internet because hello, I need that for ME.)

I also really think long-term. I try not to worry about the debt I'm accumulating RIGHT NOW because I KNOW that when I graduate, I will be able to live on 1/2 of my salary and put the other 1/2 towards debt.

Put forth your goal, put a date to it, plan a reward and get working towards it. That date is gonna come if you're ready or not so you might as well get ready for it.
post #23 of 32
Thread Starter 
thanks for sharing, lah7. your story is encouraging. i feel that way a lot..like, one day at a time, sometimes in hour increments, and one day it will be different. planning and investing. probably not my greatest strengths.

best of luck to you and i hope you share along your journey!
post #24 of 32
Me! I'm divorced with 50/50 custody of our two boys and no child support. But I make more money than my ex. I work about 45 hours a week first shift. He works second shift, so I always have the kids after school until bedtime when he picks them up.

I just started an online class for this summer, and this fall I'm taking two more classes in person in the early afternoon. I already have a bunch of credits from getting an Associates in vet tech. I'm taking a bunch of general education classes at a community college so I can transfer directly to a major at the university. I'm thinking biochemistry or some such science. I'd like to go into research.

My current GPA is 3.5 and I want to get it up to 4.0 I've made school my #1 priority, and even broke up with my boyfriend because I don't have time to go out anymore. I'm hoping I can get a bunch of scholarships so I can cut a lot of my work hours when I finally get to the point of transferring to the university. I get a good amount of financial aid already.
post #25 of 32

Raising my hand, pre-nursing student full time and I work overnight Thurs-Sat, ds father and I worked out an agreement he will stay with his afther next semester, fingers crossed it all works out!!!

post #26 of 32

Talk to me about Microbiology and A&P!!!!! lol

post #27 of 32

I have a few minutes so let me go into detail. I have felt just awful about how busy with school I have been I go Mon-Thurs all day and he is in daycare when I pick him up I am tired, then Thurs when I pick him up from daycare I have to pack our overnight bag and head down to my mom's who lives an hour away so that my little sisters can watch him while I work at night 10pm to 8am... Friday morning he HAS to go to daycare, the director gets fussy if he misses too many Fridays so my mom meets me halfway and I hurry him to daycare and sleep for 3 hours pick him up early from daycare  (just to sya he went) and head back down to moms to try and get some rest before having to go into work that night at 9pm or 10pm depending if I need to come in early, and I do the samething Sat night. Sunday after I wake up we pack up and head back North so start the week over again. it is truly a strain but the end justifies the means. I have a sense of peace about him being with his father and step mother, we have all talked and will get it in wriitng through mediation, it was a catch 22 on one hand I felt horrible for feeling so frustrated when it came to juggling single parenting, school and working but on the other hand I did not want to feel like a failure as a mother by allowing my son to be with his father while I focused on school... I guess it all comes down to trusting your gut feeling.  

post #28 of 32

I'm a single mom in school.. well, I am newly divorced, and was attending the university before we split, and I intend on finishing my undergrad and going to grad school as well. I have a full scholarship so all my pell grant money is disbursed to me, plus I am getting student loans. I don't have a regular job but i do have a temp research assistant job for my department. Right now, the kiddos are at their dad's Mon-Thurs and I have them Thurs night-Sun.. at least until finals is over so I can figure out a new childcare plan and we'll probably switch that around.

post #29 of 32

I wish my son's father and I lived in the same city so that we could have an arrangement like that. Congrats on the full scholarship, that is what I am applying for!

post #30 of 32
Originally Posted by ishereal View Post

I wish my son's father and I lived in the same city so that we could have an arrangement like that. Congrats on the full scholarship, that is what I am applying for!

Actually, we don't live in the same city. We live about a little over an hour apart. We meet in the middle and exchange kids once a week.


X-h doesn't have a job and moved in with his mom, so that schedule works out for us, since my school is my "job" so I have to be there M-Th. I don't know how things will change once he gets one.


post #31 of 32

My sons father lives in D.C and I live in TX *sigh* so much for meeting halfway, lol 

post #32 of 32

I'm a full-time student and have not gotten child support for years.  I moved to a cheaper area, drive an old car, and live mortgage-free in a mobile home in the boonies.  I take my classes online, and work part-time from home (writing/editing/marketing/nonprofit) and out of the home with kids (teaching UU sunday school).  We've homeschooled all the way, but the kids will likely start school next year (in 2nd, 4th, & 6th grades) since I'll have internships and such and haven't figured out another plan.

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