? about leaving my baby

[Steph604]

Hi there,

My DS is 9 months right now, and has always been breastfed. He is starting to eat some solids now but still nurses at least 4 times during the day and he has to eat twice at night (he has a metabolic disorder and is not allowed to go longer than 6 hours without eating or he will get very sick, go into a coma and can die).

To date, I have only left him a few times and only for a few hours each time. He has never really took to the bottle and just recently *sometimes will take it. So it makes me too nervous to leave him, especially because of his disorder.

Well my best friend is getting married this August and Im her maid of honor so I will be throwing her a stagette party in July as well as she wants me to spend the day and whole night before her wedding with her (without my son there) along with the rest of the bridal party, and then the next day help set up all day and then go to her wedding and reception.

She doesnt want my son to be at any of these events so Im trying to figure out what I should do. He will be about 12 months when this all takes place so Im not sure how life will look then. I will still be breastfeeding him then, but do most 12 month old just breastfeed in the morning and night? I dont know if I should hope for him to take a bottle and then also be eating solids throughout the day.

Thanks if you made it this far and thanks so much for any help/advice, Im so nervous about what to do, but I want to be there for my friend as well.

[zinemama]

If your son didn't have this medical condition, I would say go, have fun, he will be fine with his father or other caregiver.

But in your shoes, with his condition I would be nervous about leaving him, too, to the point where I really wouldn't enjoy myself at all, and would very much resent my friend. If I were you, I would be there as her matron of honor, but not spend the entire day and night before the wedding with her, or help set up all day.

You can "be there" for your friend at the wedding. But you have a son with a medical condition. He comes first. If your friend doesn't get that, she's not much of a friend.

[isabchi]

Oh my!!...Sorry,but from my point of view. Aday and half with you friend without my 1 year old child, for a wedding, sounds to much...no thanks!. you can be there for the wedding . For a normal child, I'll consider it for mom that need to work travel that need the income. When do you need put food at you table, but not in such a special condition as you child for weeding.

I left my my 2 1/2 yo for a day to go to very special wedding. She cry couple times during the day. I missed her so badly. ...After all the couple split out after 8 month of marriage...i just remember to my daughter crying at the phone....

[Nicole730]

If she is not willing to have your son at any of those events I wouldn't go. My children come first. Especially with a disorder and needing to eat, I would feel way too uncomfortable and nervous. At 12 months DS was still nursing quite a bit, he was fine when I was gone though...but still I would never leave him for more than a day (not an overnight!). That's for my comfort level and his.

[rparker]

Originally Posted by isabchi

Oh my!!...Sorry,but from my point of view. Aday and half with you friend without my 1 year old child, for a wedding, sounds to much...no thanks!. you can be there for the wedding . For a normal child, I'll consider it for mom that need to work travel that need the income. When do you need put food at you table, but not in such a special condition as you child for weeding.

Your friend is being unreasonable and selfish to even put you in this position. At 12 months my daughter did take a bottle and there's no way I would have left her for more than 8 hours unless it were an emergency or the reasons stated above. If she had a metabolic disorder and wasn't comfortable bottle feeding? Absolutely not.

[blessedwithboys]

my kids dont have any such condition and i still would never have left them at 12 mos for more than about 3-4 hrs, nevermind overnight.