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Throwing a half birthday party - Page 2

post #21 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by Keria View Post
Ok then then I would do a no presents party, presents are for Birthdays not half birthdays.

<respectfully snipped >
What is the difference?? I just don't understand why it matters what date the birthday is celebrated on. Please, someone enlighten me...what is so offensive about half b-days?? This is assuming that you don't have a party for the regular b-day of course.
post #22 of 53
Well not ofensive, but it seems a little silly, dont like your birthday pick another one, Birhtdays are a celebration of when your child entered the world what exactly are you celebrating in a half birthday, it just seems like an excuse to have a party on a sunny day, which is fine have the party, you can even do 1/4 birhtday, 3/4 birhtday, just don't expect people to bring presents. And please do celebrate around the kids actual birthday, even if it's just a imidiate family thing, I can't imaigne not having any celebrations on my birhtday and being told I have to wait 6 months when it is more convinient to have a party.
post #23 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by Keria View Post
Well not ofensive, but it seems a little silly, dont like your birthday pick another one, Birhtdays are a celebration of when your child entered the world what exactly are you celebrating in a half birthday, it just seems like an excuse to have a party on a sunny day, which is fine have the party, you can even do 1/4 birhtday, 3/4 birhtday, just don't expect people to bring presents. And please do celebrate around the kids actual birthday, even if it's just a imidiate family thing, I can't imaigne not having any celebrations on my birhtday and being told I have to wait 6 months when it is more convinient to have a party.
Well, according to the OP's earlier posts, her DS's birthday is just a few days before Christmas and her family has been extended by remarriage, so everyone is going in different directions during the holidays. When my twins turned 1 the party was more about adults and older nieces and nephews anyway, as my LO's didn't have any actual friends. I believe she also said that the weather is pretty brutal in December where she is, so a summer party would be more comfortable for everyone.

I think of parties, especially birthday parties as a time to celebrate a special person. And when I am a guest at a party I appreciate that the person throwing the shindig took the time to prepare food and drinks and so my gift is both a thank you for the effort and for the honoree a way of saying "I'm glad you're you!".

What do you think of people who get married without guests and then have a reception at a later time?
post #24 of 53
I'm not comfortable with birthdays being celebrated on days other than the date on each a person was actually born. DD1's birthday is Dec 21 and that's when we celebrate it. We do private birthdays (me, dh, the kids) so Christmas isn't a problem and I don't care about the -40 weather here.

If I want to have a big summer party with friends/family then I would do so as it's own party not as a birthday.
post #25 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by dubfam View Post
What is the difference?? I just don't understand why it matters what date the birthday is celebrated on. Please, someone enlighten me...what is so offensive about half b-days?? This is assuming that you don't have a party for the regular b-day of course.
I've been thinking about this since the thread started. I don't find them offensive and I'd show up gift in hand.

But - as a January baby who has always gotten 75% off calendars in droves and no gifts the rest of the year so I do have some idea - I guess for me I do think they kind of convey the wrong message. Your birthday is to celebrate your birth. I can totally see moving the celebration a few weeks in either direction, especially around major holidays.

But if you move it to a season when it's most convenient to entertain, then I think you really really are making the convenience and entertainment the focus and not the birthday. In some ways I think this is unfair to the child -- we'll give you a party when we're good and ready to. And in other ways I think it doesn't allow for the fact that every party will have its challenges and ups and downs and that this too is life. It's this concept of perfection that seems to me to be totally making parents and kids crazy. And it does kind of confuse the guests - are we celebrating 1? 2? 1.5? Summer?

So for me anyway, I wouldn't be comfortable with it. At 18 months I don't think it will make a whit of difference in any case though and as I said, ehn, I'd come. I love parties.

FWIW my son's birthday is towards the end of August and it's impossible to get people to come because of cottage and holiday trips and stuff. Last year I limited the guest list without accounting for that and ended up having a really, really small party and - it was totally fine. The year before that we were having 4 kids and my son got stomach flu for his birthday. Life happens.
post #26 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by wondertwins View Post
Well, according to the OP's earlier posts, her DS's birthday is just a few days before Christmas and her family has been extended by remarriage, so everyone is going in different directions during the holidays.
I don't understand this argument. We all get a different lot in life. Some people have birthdays that happen at "easier" times of the year, and other people don't. I had a birthday in the middle of the summer. So, I didn't get a party with lots of kids because they were all on vacation. So we did something else. I'd have a couple close friends over and we'd go to a movie or do some really cool thing.

Birthdays are to celebrate the day you were born on. They aren't about presents or anything else.

I can see shifting the celebration by a week or two. That's what we generally do in order to find a weekend when the people who are important to us can come. But, by 6 months? That just seems ridiculous.
post #27 of 53
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dubfam View Post
What is the difference?? I just don't understand why it matters what date the birthday is celebrated on. Please, someone enlighten me...what is so offensive about half b-days?? This is assuming that you don't have a party for the regular b-day of course.
Id like to know too..
post #28 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by heavensearth View Post
Id like to know too..
Because it's not the kid's birthday. If you want to have a party in the summer, have a party. But calling it a "half birthday" doesn't really work.

I have kids with birthdays around Christmas too. We move them by a week (in either direction) and people who can come do, and those who can't don't. It's really not a big deal.
post #29 of 53
I was thinking about starting to do half-birthday parties for DS too. His birthday is January 6th. This year, 2/3 of the people who were going to come to his party couldn't make it because of a snowstorm two days before. If we do half-birthdays, we can do a cookout or something, plus people aren't all partied out from the holidays. I don't see the problem with doing half-birthdays. Either way it's a big celebration for the kid once a year. I'd be irked if somebody were doing birthday AND half-birthday parties so that the kid could get double presents, but when it's just once a year, I'm cool with it.
post #30 of 53
What do you guys think about small, family celebration on the child's actual birthday, then big party with friends on their half birthday? My daughter's birthday is in January, just like her father, and he said he hated not being able to do anything fun on his birthday because of the weather. My birthday is in September, but I always hated not being able to have a beach party or outdoor water party of some sort. We were considering doing this for our daughter as she got older.
post #31 of 53
Thread Starter 
Who would have thought that a half birthday discussion could get so interesting?!

Making the day special for DS is why we are doing a half birthday - it will be his day without "Christmas" involved. He will be able to have everyone who cares about him be there, enjoy themselves and not be at all partied out. He wont be restricted by the weather either.

As for celebrating a birthday on the actual day.. im born on July 1st (Canada Day) and it does suck. As much as my parents would try, I could never have a party on the actual day with friends and extended family, I always wanted to have a bday on a day that could be for me. My hubby is almost a New Year baby, so he's in the same boat, he said that he's never been able to differentiate between Christmas and his birthday because most family would wish him a happy bday at the Christmas get together. Im not surprised that we almost had a Christmas baby

Thanks again for your suggestions mama's, I do appreciate it!
post #32 of 53
I think there's a difference (in people's minds) when you say "we're celebrating his Xth birthday in June, since December is so busy for everyone" and "we're celebrating his 18mo (or 2.5, 5.5, 16.5yr) bday!" The latter just *sounds* like a gift grab.

Like I said, we always did #1's friend party a couple of months later, when everyone had that holiday letdown. I've also left it 'til spring and taken just one or two friends to a MLB ballgame. I'm having #2's Sweet 16 this w/e, though her bday is in March - it just worked better for us/me. But we're celebrating the birthday - not a half anything.

It's all a matter of presentation.
post #33 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by limette View Post
I'm not comfortable with birthdays being celebrated on days other than the date on each a person was actually born. DD1's birthday is Dec 21 and that's when we celebrate it. We do private birthdays (me, dh, the kids) so Christmas isn't a problem and I don't care about the -40 weather here.

If I want to have a big summer party with friends/family then I would do so as it's own party not as a birthday.
THis seems a little stringent to me. Don't you or your husband work? My borther in law is a fireman - sometimes they have to work around his schedule.
post #34 of 53
My birthday is within a week of Christmas, and both my kids have bad-weather birthdays, and I'm just not a fan of celebrating at other times. It just isn't the birthday, and the purpose of a birthday party is to celebrate the birthday, not to have a party and get presents when convenient.

But, having said that, if you're going to do it, I'd present it like an OP said, and call it the birthday party instead of the half birthday party, and say you're celebrating it 6 months early to avoid Christmas.
post #35 of 53
I think there is something beautiful and reverent about honoring the seasonality of birthdays, and the specialness of that particular day when that person entered the world. I have always been conscious of that and try to incorporate it in dc's b-days. For our December baby we started a tradition of making gingerbread houses during his party. We have kids that have been attending his parties for 10 years that look forward to this....even though they're teens now. We have all our lights and stuff up and talk about what a beautiful season it is to have a b-day (dh and I are also born in Dec.). One year we gave ornaments as part of the goody-bag. We also usually go tree-hunting right the day or so after his party. It's all become a lovely, reverent tradition and ds loves his Dec. b-day. We also love to remember fondly the day he was born in '95...the huge blizzard and -20 windchills and how everyone had to come to us because he was born at home with a fire roaring in the fireplace and holiday lights twinkling all around...

I can't imagine having a celebration for him at the opposite time of year. That said, we also have 2 June babies...their b-days involve grilling out, water guns, bug hunting, painting flower pots, sometimes a bonfire (guess we could do that in Dec. too). It's just different. Different season, different type of reverence. It is when they were born and it is special and part of who they are. I also have a ds born in April. Sometimes it rains or is cold. Sometimes it's beautiful. It's always wonderful because it is his birthday.

So, those are some of my reasons why I think it is important to celebrate at least somewhere near the actual b-day. If you do a half-party, I would still do something very special for the actual day, even if it is just immediate family. I would not want to send the message the day my dc is born sucks because it is near a major holiday or has bad weather. This coming from someone born Dec. 15.
post #36 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by limette View Post
I'm not comfortable with birthdays being celebrated on days other than the date on each a person was actually born. DD1's birthday is Dec 21 and that's when we celebrate it. We do private birthdays (me, dh, the kids) so Christmas isn't a problem and I don't care about the -40 weather here.

If I want to have a big summer party with friends/family then I would do so as it's own party not as a birthday.
Ah, but then nobody would bring presents
post #37 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by limette View Post
I'm not comfortable with birthdays being celebrated on days other than the date on each a person was actually born. DD1's birthday is Dec 21 and that's when we celebrate it. We do private birthdays (me, dh, the kids) so Christmas isn't a problem and I don't care about the -40 weather here.

If I want to have a big summer party with friends/family then I would do so as it's own party not as a birthday.
My youngest was born on the 17th and I'm the 24th. (Oldest and DH is October 29th and baby to be will be end of August, so all our birthdays are pretty poor times to throw parties) I often have his a week before because folks are busy and the Saturday/Sunday before usually is the optimal time anyhow. Even though we're December babies, I'm still stubborn enough to do the whole birthday in or around the actual date. That said, once you hit the 20th on, it gets really hard. However I'm lucky in that my friends and family realize how much that can stink. They all got together on my 30th on my actual birth date to celebrate, which made it all the more special.
post #38 of 53
We celebrate each of our (mine and each of the kids) bdays on the actual day, but just the three of us. Dinner is the bday kid's choice - out or in - and the other two take care of it (yes, they cook or pay on my bday - I usually choose something they cook really well, at home). We do something with my parents and bro/sil + her sister and mother on the closest weekend to it. Friend party when we can.
post #39 of 53
Thread Starter 
choli, Im not sure what I posted that implied that we are celebrating DS half birthday in order to get presents?

limette, does your son not ever want a party with his friends? it never occurred to me to just not throw a party (with friends and extended family) period.

Tigeresse, sounds like you have a very lovely tradition (and had a wonderful homebirth!). We will be celebrating our son's birthday as a family, just the three of us, on the actual day. I honestly don't think anyone in our family or circle of friends would ever think that because we are having the party on a different day, that we view the day our son was born as a bad day or inconvenient day, or anything like that, and if they do, they obviously don't know us very well.

****

So, I think ive decided not to even include the word "birthday" on the invites
post #40 of 53
What an interesting discussion! My daughter's birthday is June 25th. Because her classmates have parties wherein they invite classmates, she wants to do the same thing. Once school gets out (the beginning of June), she'd be able to have a few classmates, but she wants her class, just like the kids who have parties during the school year.

Her half birthday is December 25th, so we can't use that as the alternative. (And that's not unheard of, in my life. I remember one year my February-born brother wanted a pool party for his birthday. So he had it on his half birthday.)

My daughter's birthday party this year is a month before her actual birthdate. It falls within the school year, so she gets to have her "big class party" just like her classmates. I see no reason to tell my 6 year old "sorry kid, you were born in late June, you have to pick a few friends and see a movie/go to an amusement park/whatever" rather than simply shifting things. I suspect as she gets older she'll want to do things like taking a friend to go see a local theater production or something. But now? She wants to do what her friends are doing & that's perfectly reasonable when it comes to almost-7 year olds and birthday parties. She wants her friends to sing happy birthday to her. She wants a birthday cake. She wants to give out goody bags. And yes, she's excited about the presents.

Heck, my daughter's actually going to be staying with her grandma on her actual birthday this year. We let her know the options (including her coming home early, us going there early, time shifting her family birthday celebration) and she picked time shifting her birthday.

But then, I come from a family where my dad traveled. I don't think there's a single holiday or celebration that wasn't time shifted at one time or another.
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