Originally Posted by hipumpkins
The teacher called my house and explained that no toys would be allowed on the ice as per the office. I am FINE with that. He said he thought telling the girls in the way he did would make that want to be serious skaters but he meant it in fun way.
I told him I was fine with no toys on the ice but it would have easier if he just said that to them and sated it was from the office b/c that is much easier to explain that some odd rule.
He did apologize and it was sincere saying, "I did go about it the wrong way"
I reiterated that we are only there for fun ad he said he actually really likes teaching our kids b/c of the no pressure and he left teaching kids headed to higher ground (nationals and such)b/c he didn't enjoy it
So we are back at a common ground.
I'm so glad he called you. It sounds like he learned something and that he is not afraid to admit he did something wrong. Those are good qualities.
I wanted to clarify something I wrote earlier in the thread though because I really dislike the way I phrased it. I said that I'd probably just assume it was about safety and tell my child that and that sounds like I meant "oh I'd just think the best of the coach's intentions and tell my kid it was about safety whether it really was or not".
What I did mean is that it probably wouldn't even occur to me that it wasn't about safety but that's because I was basing this on my experiences with my son's activities which have thus far been pressure-free. His swim coach is strict about safety, but not manipulative. After the lessons, he is happy to see kids playing and enjoying being in the water. He sometimes gives a play break during the lesson too.
It was a moot point anyway since you had asked him and he said it wasn't a safety issue, but since people kept bringing up safety I wanted to say to those PPs, as someone who completely agreed with you, that it would have been my first thought too. I guess I just wanted to say, Well just because we're unschoolers doesn't mean we don't think about safety! (and to add that you had already said that wasn't the issue)
But I think it might have come across as another post telling you what you should have done.
This pressure on kids does concern me as I seek out opportunities for activities that my son is asking for. It's one reason that we plan to try a soccer class (which the website emphasizes is to learn and have fun) rather than the local team.
Originally Posted by rhiandmoi
Today I had to have a very difficult conversation with one of my employees wherein I had to try to explain to her that customers (ie. our authority figures) are not always logical and fair. I really wish her parents had had this discussion with her when she was 7 and that she had a lifetime of practice to get used to this idea.
Are you saying that this employee grew up being heard, validated, trusted, respected and not only accepted, but celebrated, for who she is and this is the result? Did you know her when she was 7 and know what kind of discussions she had with her parents? I mean I could say the same thing, that I wish when she was 7 she had been validated and comforted when someone wasn't logical or fair so she would know she had options and could choose how she wanted to deal with people like that in a way that was in line with both her principles and her own objectives (such as keeping her job or helping someone even if they are unpleasant).