Originally Posted by janeisabelle
Emmeline II, yep.
No, he wasn't in daycare. He was always watched by different family members.
Doing stuff with food has always sounded very hard to me. He and I are both picky eaters to begin with, and it seems overwhelming to do special diets. I am going to get in touch with his doctors and discuss it though.
stik, his 1on1 person is absolutely wonderful, she is involved with the whole class, not just sitting on top of his every move, and truly does nothing but help hugely. We all love her and he doesn't resent her or feel stigmatized by her at all. Maybe if he were older...
jetteaa, as I said in a previous post, he has a paraprofessional who is pretty much one on one with him. The teacher doesn't appear to give him any extra attention, let alone put 100% of her attention on him.
The school says they don't feel he is EI, and the volunteer advocate said not to push for it as it could be a stigma in the future when his behavior is better [if it is and I am working so hard toward that]. As far as Otherwise Health Impaired, that is what they labeled him for the 504 but they said he doesn't qualify for an IEP, only a 504. The principal also said that ADHD does not account for hitting and kicking.
I will try special needs forum, too.
Oh, I really don't want to battle with the school. I really don't. I want to foster a situation where the school and I work together to help my son. Which is how it was going until recently...and I desperately want to get back to that.
Again, thank you everyone.
I've somehow been successful in maintaining a team approach with my son's school district despite all of the "fights" we've had. I constantly remind them that our goal is to support my son so that he can be educated in the least restrictive environment. I think they like hearing it from me and knowing I'm not trying to make them do everything and without making any effort to do my part.
But they WILL NEVER volunteer information that will make it easier for you to navigate the special services. They WILL NOT tell you what other services are available for your son if you don't name them or ask for them. These supports DO cost money but you have to remember that the school budget is none of your concern. And sometimes, when you push for your son's needs to be met and finally receive the proper supports it turns out, like in my situation, that it's actually cheaper for the school than they thought - and cheaper than what they were already doing.
When I go to meetings, I bring a framed picture of my son and put it right there in the middle of the desk for all to see. I also start off each meeting with a short update on my son and share some of his recent achievements and current interests. I usually have one of his jokes to share, too. They often bring muffins and fruit to the meetings.
It's very nice that they have worked with you and done many things to help support your son. But it's not working and they are trying to give up. They are not allowed to give up. My method was to ask questions. Ask tons of questions. "If this setting isn't working, what setting do you suggest?" "If the aide isn't the answer to his explosive outbursts, what else can we do?" "WHAT ELSE?" was my most frequently asked question. And when I came up with the solution to send my son to this wonderful school that practices Collaborative Problem Solving, I never once told the school that was my plan. I told my son's psychiatrist, I told my son's therapist, I told my son's neurologist. They all wrote letters to the school outlining his deficits and needs and offering suggestions for environments where they thought my son would succeed (and worded these letters so they would lead them to placing him at the school I had chosen). They didn't name the school, either, they just described the best case scenario. When my son's school district finally came to the point where they brought up changing his school to another school that could meet his needs, I asked them for names of schools. I researched the schools and took my son to visit them and then showed them how those options wouldn't work. Then came WHAT ELSE? and they had nothing. So I gave them a list of schools that his therapist suggested. There were 3 schools on the list. One had a 9 month wait list, one turned out not to work when my son had an explosive outburst on a visiting day, so that left the school I had chosen. I sat back and let them discuss it and they even went on a tour. And now he's there. He's been there for one year now and has recently made progress on his IEP goals for the first time ever! He also completed the 3rd grade state competency testing without complaint. I'm so amazed at how they've supported him at this school.
Sorry for rambling through my whole story but what I learned is that it's important to be firm, organized, get your team lined up, research your state special education code for procedure and to find out how to support your son backed up by portions of that code and then sit back and be patient while you never waiver or let them railroad you.
Right now my challenge is that the district is saying he doesn't qualify for OT and SLP services even though they agree he clearly shows the need for supports in those areas. I have a team lined up and will be meeting with them in the morning