Would you co-sleep with an Obese person in the bed?

[Inquiringmind]

I'm just wondering if you would co-sleep with a morbidly obese person in the bed.
If yes, what steps would you take to make it safe?
If no, what would be your sleep arrangements?

[eclipse]

I'm obese and I coslept with my kids. I never felt like they were in any danger from me. I didn't do anything extra to "make it safe." Although it's commonly thrown out there that obesity makes cosleeping dangerous, I don't think there's actually any evidence of that.

[HeliMom]

I will have to find it but I thought i read somewhere that it's not the obesity itself that makes for dangerous co sleeping but the sleep problems associated with obesity such as sleep apnea. My little one has slept between me and my mother a few nights. She is obese but she has no sleep disorders.

[akind1]

by BMI, both my husband and I are obese. We neither of us have sleep issues and we co sleep.

[aquapacata]

i really don't see what the big deal is about this, either. i'm overweight, too - and most women who have just given birth have a little extra padding! i was really worried about having DS in bed at first, but it just happened that way, and i don't worry about it. what i do worry about is him turning onto his side so that he's almost buried in my side or in the mattress, so i have to reposition him in the crook of my arm sometimes, or wait till he's out well and turn him to his back. but that has nothing to do with my size!

[Lula's Mom]

My husband used to be obese, and we have always coslept. He was big, but it didn't change him being aware of his body in relation to where the baby was.

[lovebug]

i think it totally depends on the said person. their habits and how they sleep.

[Sharlla]

Originally Posted by akind1

by BMI, both my husband and I are obese. We neither of us have sleep issues and we co sleep.

same here
Posted via Mobile Device

[Inquiringmind]

Originally Posted by HeliMom

I will have to find it but I thought i read somewhere that it's not the obesity itself that makes for dangerous co sleeping but the sleep problems associated with obesity such as sleep apnea.

I keep seeing obesity in the same category as drinking alcohol and it really makes me wonder if the the two are comparable. If it's really sleep apnea that's the problem, why don't they just say so?

[Inquiringmind]

Originally Posted by aquapacata

i really don't see what the big deal is about this, either. i'm overweight, too - and most women who have just given birth have a little extra padding!

I guess I didn't specify this in the poll, but I'm really asking about people who are morbidly obese, so a BMI of 40+ or at least 100 pounds overweight.

[eclipse]

I honestly think it's about people making assumptions about obesity based on prejudice.

[vbactivist]

Originally Posted by Inquiringmind

I keep seeing obesity in the same category as drinking alcohol and it really makes me wonder if the the two are comparable. If it's really sleep apnea that's the problem, why don't they just say so?

YEs - becasue my husband who is thin (5'10" 160 pounds) has sleep apnea.

I am considered obese and have always coslept. We also sleep with blankets, pillows and older sibilings. No big deal. REad "The Family BEd" by Tine Thevenin. An oldie but a goody

[Jenne]

Yes. If I didn't cosleep with someone obese I would not get to sleep. So far I haven't rolled over on myself...I'm not that obese...yet! I agree with previous posters who have specified sleeping habits, apnea, and such are much (no pun intended!) bigger issues effecting cosleeping. My DH hasn't complained and neither have the dogs/cats. When the time comes we will cosleep with kiddos. I'm not worried.

On a side note it would be interesting to see how many things are "obese people shouldn't do X" simply because of the fat phobia our US country seems obsessed with...

Jenne

[treemom2]

I'm probably considered morbidly obese and I felt very comfortable co-sleeping with my newborns, infants, toddlers, children. . . I actually worried more about my DH sleeping with them and he's not obese just a sound sleeper. I'd put them between the wall and me with a pillow shoved down in the crack of the bed so there was no chance they would fall between the wall and the bed. I used blankets. I slept with a pillow, but I don't move much so it was always under my head. I also exclusively breastfed them and woke at every movement and cry when they were newborns and infants. I never felt uncomfortable sleeping with them in this situation. As they got older, they moved between DH and me. . .but still I breastfed and woke at every little sound and movement. Then, when they were older (around 4 years) and moved to their own futons next to our bed. . .well, that's when my sleep pattern changed. . .I noticed I slept more soundly. I think as a woman and a mother I had a 6th sense when I was with my babies. . .maybe it was the breastfeeding and being able to smell them all night, who knows?!!?

[CliffRose]

I would, but I would also get a crib mattress and build some kind of attachement to my existing bed, so the baby would have his/her own space.
But if I had another kid, I'd do that anyways, and I'm thin.

[lili-chan]

Obesity shouldn't affect a person's body awareness and thus it shouldn't have any impact on bed safety. A king size bed or a cosleeper attached to the bed can create more room and comfort for all. We put our queen size mattresses on the floor next to another futon and a king size sheet over the whole thing to create our own make-shift king size bed. Our daughter is on the futon addition and I scoot over to her to nurse during the night.

[Ammaarah]

I was much heavier when I had my daughter and I was very aware of her. My DH (normal weight) didn't sleep with us at first because we would have been packed a bit tighter than we wanted. When we got a king, we all bunked together and no problems.

It is important to get SA treated, but many people have it who are not morbidly obese. If you or your spouse snore, need excessive amounts of sleep, never feel rested, it's really important to consult with a doctor no matter what your size.

[Marsupialmom]

I am overweight bored morbidly obese by the BMI. I coslept.

I have an aunt that was close to 500lbs. I would discourage her from cosleeping. I don't think she could feel a baby that well. She scared me holding my child.

So yes there are some people I would say cribs better others it wouldn't matter.

[lifeguard]

I agree with pp - being obese in & of itself is not the actual risk - it's the sleep problems that can go along with it. Dh & I are both large & we are VERY aware of where ds is when he's in the bed with us. But if we were thin we would all have more room!

[plunky]

My guess is that the people voting "no" are not fat.

A more interesting question might be: are you a fat person and did that factor into your decision to cosleep or not?

Personally, I think Moms and Dads who choose to cosleep should be trusted to figure out what's safe for themselves and given the benefit of the doubt, regardless of their weight.