My DSD, who is six, is picked up off the bus on Wednesdays by a friend of ours. He stays with her from 4 until 5:45 when I get home from work. She normally goes home with a classmate on Fridays, again from 4 until 5:45. This week, her friend had a doctor's appointment, and our friend said he would be more than happy to add a day. On Wednesday, as he was leaving, he told me, "See you Friday!" You can see where this is going, I'm sure...
I got home from work yesterday, and didn't notice his car outside. Not very strange, they will sometimes go to his house instead, to play video games. There was a note on the garage door, which I assumed would let me know the pickup or drop-off plan. Instead, the note read, "I'm home. From HA." (Her initials). STILL not suspecting anything, I walked inside, to find her on the couch, watching TV. She turned to look at me, and said, in a perfectly calm, cheerful voice, "Nobody was there to get me off the bus, so I walked home by myself. I'm in first grade, so I'm old enough."
Now, this is actually true. Her school's policy is not to let kindergartners off the bus unless there is a parent or babysitting waiting for them. If no one is there, they will be driven back to school and their emergency contacts will be called. After kindergarten... fair game, I guess.
Here's what she told me, as I stood there in a state of shock... No one was there to get her, so she thought maybe someone would be waiting for her at home. (This has never happened. Someone has ALWAYS been there to get her off the bus.) She walked home, and only got confused once as to which house we lived in. (They are town homes, four connected, and I still get confused sometimes as to which we live in). She used our garage door code to get in the house, and made sure to thank me for teaching it to her last week. She says she walked in, realized no one was home, and just... decided to go about her business, I guess, secure in the knowledge that, "When the clock said 5:45, I knew you would get home." She realized I wouldn't see our friend's car outside, and didn't want me to leave, hence the note on the garage door, which she said she put there after changing her clothes and realizing no one was coming home for a while. She then shut the garage door after herself. She had to jump to reach it, and has never done it before.
After changing her clothes, she did her homework, then she turned on the TV, which she had to stand on the couch to do, because she's too short for the signal on the remote to connect with the box. She has never in her life turned the TV on by herself. She watched TV for the next hour. Scooby Doo first, then Minute to Win it. She had not gotten a snack, because she couldn't open the applesauce by herself, she told me, and she didn't think it would be safe to use the microwave without me or her daddy being home.
So. In general, she is an amazingly mature, calm, and very smart kid. And never did I think, in a million years, she would have been able to do something like this. We have never gone over what to do in a situation like this, because... who would put a 6 year old in a situation like this?? She has been asking for about four months when she would be old enough to stay home alone. We told her we thought 10 would be a good age to try it for 20 minutes or so if we needed to go grocery shopping, but as the time got closer, we could reevaluate.
She wasn't scared, or worried. She trusted that I would come home to her, and she had enough self confidence to just go about our evening routine... by herself. She did mention she thought it would be a good idea for us to get a phone at home (we use our cell phones) because, "Then I could've called you to tell you to hurry up."
We will be getting a pre-paid cell phone tomorrow to keep at home, with our numbers programmed into it. As well as obviously more dependable child-care. When we finally got ahold of him at 10:30 last night, he had just... forgotten. And was very sorry. She wanted to know when she could do it again, and was disappointed to learn that 10 was still our answer.
When I think about all the things that COULD HAVE happened, well... I can't even go there. Mostly what I'm feeling right now is pride. We had, in no way, done anything to prepare her for this. She is the only child in our house, thus far, and it has now occurred to me... we don't really expect a lot out of her, other than cleaning up after herself. We haven't taught her how to do a whole lot in the way of looking after herself, and didn't really expect to for a while. We have never told her not to use the microwave by herself, or the important of "leaving a note." She just... knew. She knew what to do to take care of herself until we returned to take over.
Could your kids do this at 6? Should we have done more in the way of preparing her for something like this? What more should we do now? Also... I need a hug. Man that was scary.
I got home from work yesterday, and didn't notice his car outside. Not very strange, they will sometimes go to his house instead, to play video games. There was a note on the garage door, which I assumed would let me know the pickup or drop-off plan. Instead, the note read, "I'm home. From HA." (Her initials). STILL not suspecting anything, I walked inside, to find her on the couch, watching TV. She turned to look at me, and said, in a perfectly calm, cheerful voice, "Nobody was there to get me off the bus, so I walked home by myself. I'm in first grade, so I'm old enough."
Now, this is actually true. Her school's policy is not to let kindergartners off the bus unless there is a parent or babysitting waiting for them. If no one is there, they will be driven back to school and their emergency contacts will be called. After kindergarten... fair game, I guess.
Here's what she told me, as I stood there in a state of shock... No one was there to get her, so she thought maybe someone would be waiting for her at home. (This has never happened. Someone has ALWAYS been there to get her off the bus.) She walked home, and only got confused once as to which house we lived in. (They are town homes, four connected, and I still get confused sometimes as to which we live in). She used our garage door code to get in the house, and made sure to thank me for teaching it to her last week. She says she walked in, realized no one was home, and just... decided to go about her business, I guess, secure in the knowledge that, "When the clock said 5:45, I knew you would get home." She realized I wouldn't see our friend's car outside, and didn't want me to leave, hence the note on the garage door, which she said she put there after changing her clothes and realizing no one was coming home for a while. She then shut the garage door after herself. She had to jump to reach it, and has never done it before.
After changing her clothes, she did her homework, then she turned on the TV, which she had to stand on the couch to do, because she's too short for the signal on the remote to connect with the box. She has never in her life turned the TV on by herself. She watched TV for the next hour. Scooby Doo first, then Minute to Win it. She had not gotten a snack, because she couldn't open the applesauce by herself, she told me, and she didn't think it would be safe to use the microwave without me or her daddy being home.
So. In general, she is an amazingly mature, calm, and very smart kid. And never did I think, in a million years, she would have been able to do something like this. We have never gone over what to do in a situation like this, because... who would put a 6 year old in a situation like this?? She has been asking for about four months when she would be old enough to stay home alone. We told her we thought 10 would be a good age to try it for 20 minutes or so if we needed to go grocery shopping, but as the time got closer, we could reevaluate.
She wasn't scared, or worried. She trusted that I would come home to her, and she had enough self confidence to just go about our evening routine... by herself. She did mention she thought it would be a good idea for us to get a phone at home (we use our cell phones) because, "Then I could've called you to tell you to hurry up."
We will be getting a pre-paid cell phone tomorrow to keep at home, with our numbers programmed into it. As well as obviously more dependable child-care. When we finally got ahold of him at 10:30 last night, he had just... forgotten. And was very sorry. She wanted to know when she could do it again, and was disappointed to learn that 10 was still our answer.
When I think about all the things that COULD HAVE happened, well... I can't even go there. Mostly what I'm feeling right now is pride. We had, in no way, done anything to prepare her for this. She is the only child in our house, thus far, and it has now occurred to me... we don't really expect a lot out of her, other than cleaning up after herself. We haven't taught her how to do a whole lot in the way of looking after herself, and didn't really expect to for a while. We have never told her not to use the microwave by herself, or the important of "leaving a note." She just... knew. She knew what to do to take care of herself until we returned to take over.
Could your kids do this at 6? Should we have done more in the way of preparing her for something like this? What more should we do now? Also... I need a hug. Man that was scary.
So she waited for me to get home to warm it up for her.
