Really need BTDT reasurance

[Xavismom]

I really really need to hear that things will get better

DS cut his first tooth last saturday, and he will.not.stop.biting me. He keeps nipping me over and over every BFing session! Yesterday he drew blood on my left nipple. I cant get him to stop. Pushing his face in towards my breast like I've read to do makes him bite down harder, so does yelping, plus he thinks its funny when I cry out in pain!!

I am having awful feelings that I'm having a hard time processing. Yesterday I was so so mad. And I felt like such a horrible person to be mad at a baby Every time I feed him, I feel scared. After he nips me a few times, I just want to push him away and leave. If I push him off because I need a break from it, he cries because he is hungry and wants mommy, and tries to scoot to me and reaches for my breast, and it is killing me inside that I dont want to give it to him. I feel horrible. When he laughs at me when I cry out, it also makes me feel resentful towards him, and I KNOW he is not doing it on purpose, which just gives me more guilt over my feelings.

He has also started another new (bad) nursing habit along with his tooth. He has been grabbing the skin to the side of the areola and pulling on it, causing his latch to change, so he is slurping on my nipple instead of latching on it. If he isnt pulling it, then he is clawing at that area of skin. If I move his hand away, he gets really upset and stops nursing and cries. It turns into a battle of wills between us during nursing, I keep pulling his hand away and he unlatches and cries, over and over and over. And then he bites me.

Our BFing relationship so far has been wonderful. Nursing has been my favorite part of being a mom, and now I feel like it is totally ruined. I dont know what to do. Pumping and bottles are not an option, he will not take a bottle. He'll drink a little out of a cup, but not enough for him to do that for meals. Stopping breastfeeding and giving formula is just not an option I am willing to look at. But I am totally misserable and I hate having these bad feelings.

Help. Please? What should I do/try?? Is this a normal phase? I feel like I'm going to breakdown.

[Starflower]

I don't know if it is normal for most babies to bite, though I did know one mom who quit nursing because of it. My baby bit me, but we made it through pretty easily.

My DD did this when she got her upper teeth in. (She got her lower teeth at 4 months so maybe 5-6 months old when she bit me?) The first time she bit me, I squealed in shock and pain and she seemed to get a kick out of my reaction. This was a normal reaction to my own reaction for her age.

The second time she bit me, I put her down on the floor for just a moment and said something like "no biting - that hurts me" in a stern voice. Then I picked her right back up. She looked like she might try it one more time and when she went to bite me, I put her down and said "no biting" again. She probably wasn't even on the floor for a whole minute, but it seemed to be effective.

She learned not to bite pretty quickly.

I hope you find a way to make it through this.

Forgot to mention: she nursed regularly until she was 6 years old.

[Xavismom]

DS is 6 months right now, this is his first tooth, a bottom one.

I absolutely dont want to stop BFing. I planned on letting him decide when to stop himself. And I just dont know what to do with all the bad feelings I'm having

[smeisnotapirate]

So normal!

Make sure latch is good - babies can get lazy when that first tooth pops out. There were times when DS was nursing that he would chomp and chomp and I had to take him off and wait until he was sleepy or something. Yours is still young now, so I would make sure to unlatch him if he starts chomping, say "be nice to momma! gentle nursing!" or something and try again. If he continues chomping, I would unlatch him and give him something to chew on for a while and then try again when he gets bored with chewing on whatever you gave him (cold things are good!).

It'll take a while, but things will get better. For the REALLY bad nights, or when his teeth are really hurting him, I've done Tylenol for the both of us. I noticed that he chomped mostly when his mouth was bothering him.

... and my DS is still nursing at 2yo, with a full set of teeth! Just be persistent, especially if this is your first bump in the road so far.

[Xavismom]

Good point, I really wonder if part of it may be the second bottom tooth seems like it might be trying to pop through.

Its encouraging to hear that you CAN have a good BF relationship with a DC with teeth. I dont know anyone IRL that nursed past a month or two, so no support there. DH is trying his best to be supportive and I appreciate his effort, but he is actually making me feel worse My moms big idea for the clawing was to cover my entire breast except for the nipple with surgical tape

How do I fix his latch?? He has never had a problem with his latch until this started. He does bite me more often when he is doing his claw & slurp routine.

[haydn'smommy]

Have you thought about a nursing necklace so that he has something to grab ahold of instead of your breast? Mine is a Godsend. Emery digs and pinches so hard that it brings tears to my eyes, but when I have it on, he tends to pull and tug on it and hold it.
As for the teeth and biting, the recommendation to take him off and tell him "no bite" is the best thing. He may be little but he's old enough to get some cause and effect, and he will quickly learn that biting = no more milk.
My oldest thought the biting mama was hilarious until I consistently removed him and started trying to offer a bottle of formula instead of the boob at those times. For him biting = icky formula and he hated that. We went on to have a wonderful nursing relationship until he was 22mos and had 16 teeth. For my youngest, I unlatched him and said "No mean baby! No biting the mama!" He just smiled and went back to nursing but hasn't really bitten me since, so I think personality has a lot to do with it. He nips occasionally but I've gotten good at realizing when he's getting ready to do it, and I just stop and say "no biting. be gentle."
Be patient with him and be gentle with yourself. All your feelings are normal. It's okay. This too shall pass.

[justKate]

Originally Posted by Xavismom

Good point, I really wonder if part of it may be the second bottom tooth seems like it might be trying to pop through.

Its encouraging to hear that you CAN have a good BF relationship with a DC with teeth. I dont know anyone IRL that nursed past a month or two, so no support there. DH is trying his best to be supportive and I appreciate his effort, but he is actually making me feel worse My moms big idea for the clawing was to cover my entire breast except for the nipple with surgical tape

How do I fix his latch?? He has never had a problem with his latch until this started. He does bite me more often when he is doing his claw & slurp routine.

If you're not opposed to Tylenol, try that. It takes the little ones some time to adjust to having something in their mouth while they nurse--they just need to get used to latching with the new tooth. I too have a clawing, pinching, smacking, kicking, eye-gouging baby, and trust me, it can improve. Might never bee 100% wonderful, but hey...

Here's what I do:
Tylenol for tooth pain at night. Not for everyone, but I don't like to see DD suffer.
When her latch is "off", I pop her off and we start over. "Open big!" And model it by opening your mouth wide.
Keep the nails as short as you can. When he pinches/claws, remove the offending hand from your skin and keep it away. I find holding DD's upper arm close to her body is best because she doesn't feel completey restrained but can't reach any of my tender parts.
Nurse him side-lying and offer your belly button to play with. DD never went for anything but skin, despite my best efforts. My belly button is a compromise.
"Hitting/pinching/hurting shows Mama that you are all done." Then take a break.
A stern "stop" sometimes works for DD, but she's 15 mos., so yours may not be ready for that.
If you get chomped, pop him off IMMEDIATELY. One more try, then take a break.
Try to keep in mind that he's trying to figure out how to latch properly with his new tooth, and that he can sense your unease.


Good luck!

[Xavismom]

I did get a nursing necklace, and its helping a ton with the new pinching/clawing thing. I think he is also biting me a bit less the past 2 days, I hope it keeps declining!!

He is still doing a weird latch thing when he bites though... like he is pulling away and stretching out my nipple. I take him off and try to put him back on but he just wants to nurse arched away from me

[Starflower]

Does he arch and pull away in all positions or just certain ones? I'm wondering if he's somehow uncomfortable in the usual position. They grow so fast sometimes it takes us a while to adjust for their new size.

Glad to hear the necklace is helping with the clawing and pinching. I hope the biting stops completely and soon.