Weekly thread, May 23-30 - Page 3

[jsh7809]

Painfully engorged boobs + grunty but fully asleep baby = insomnia from 3 a.m. on while the LO sleeps.
FML

[rhiOrion]

Sme- I would actually prefer to not use a daycare center, but I haven't had any luck finding any home daycare type situations. There were barely any suggestions at all in FYT. And the one mom who does daycare lives too far from me. I know they must be out there. But in the mean time I'm going to do center tours and get on waiting lists, that way I can use a center if I need to. But I'll keep looking for home-based, too.

[loveneverfails]

Rhi, if you attend religious services of any kind, that might be a good resource for finding an at home daycare situation. The friends I have who do home day care typically look and post bulletin board things at their churches and it's worked pretty well for them. Maybe put up some ads at local churches, synagogues, etc? Libraries?

[Carita]

going back to work I am in total denial about this - I have to call DCPs this week, but don't want to. I hate talking on the phone and I hate the idea of putting her back in DC, but honestly, it was much harder with my son. I had to put him in DC PT at 7 weeks old, and it just about killed me. This time I have a few months off and am so thankful. But I still haven't found a place and that does give me a bit of anxiety. I think working PT was the best situation, and really, that is what my summer will be like since I'm trying to finish my dissertation (goal to submit final draft is Aug).

projectile vomit I was getting 1 vomit/day reliablely, but in our case I don't think it is food sensitivity, I think its burping/feeding related. Sometimes she mouthes and is fussy if she has a burp and occasionally she'll reluctantly take the boob anyway. Low and behold she'll puke up everything I gave her. She also has a rather sensitive gag reflex. Anyway - I don't notice a diet change on days she is better (I eat a lot of the same things eve day) and I don't notice any particular time of day is worse than another. So being super vigilant about getting burps out has reduced out vomiting form 1-2x/day to once every 3 days or so. And as I get better reading her cues, it goes better.

grunty baby jess - my baby has her grunty periods & i think she's only 1/2 asleep really. If I get up and chenge her very quietly with only a nightlight and go back to bed on the boob, she'll sleep soundly again. I think she's only grunty because her diaper is wet.

food sensitivity DS had a dairy issue. it was much more obvious when we got to table foods. But I eliminated major dairy while BFing only. Then when we were on table foods I eliminated major dairy first - which eliminated vomits & ear infections, but I also then finished eliminating all dairy for both of us & actually noticed a substantial behavior improvement. So it may be worth it to do total dairy cut out Rhi for a few weeks, and when/if you add back the hidden dairy keep an eye on mood and behavior as well as all the rest.

AFM - have company in town, supposed to be working right now though, so I should do that, but I think we are growth spurting here? She slept so much yesterday, and ate a good deal too (when she wasn't sleeping)!

[GreenTeaGinger61]

Originally Posted by smeisnotapirate

It can be a really rude transition for those of us who have tough firstborn children.

And it's ok to think to yourself that things are going terribly or that all you want is a stiff drink and a different life just for one night. Take breaks whenever you can get them, do what you need to do to stay sane, and keep repeating "this too shall pass." My mother used it as a mantra when my brother and I were little kids just to survive, and now when she says it, she sounds downright nostalgic.

I remember many times when dealing with ds's screaming from 6-11 thinking there was NO WAY I'd ever have more kids, and here I am with four. Luckily they were easier after him. It was huge for me to go from being extremely independent, sucessful at nearly everything I put my mind to, to having this tiny little being on me all the time who I couldn't please. It was rough, and there were times when I wished he wasn't there, when I wondered why I was crazy enough to want a baby. It was nothing like the fantasies I had imagined. It was literally hell on earth most of the time. But then it passed just as quickly and he was an amazingly wonderful baby who grew into the same kind of toddler and then into this great kid. I look at him know and am like how did that screaming red bundle become this?!

With my PPD with DD1 I felt guilty because she was so good and I was still depressed. I didn't reach out because I thought everyone would think I was nuts for having PPD with such a good baby. LOL. There's no winning when you're a mom.

This shall pass is a mantra a lot of wise mamas have passed onto me. I use it a lot

Hugs and remember to be nice to yourself!

Rhi: Are there any alternative type preschools in the area? This where the woman I know who do in home daycare got their clients (these women I know wear the babies they watch, support breastfeeding, etc). Also maybe look into some homeschool groups? A lot the women I know how homeschool take in one or two kids to watch for extra income.

And I had good luck with the centers I used (well one was bad for ds but good for dd1). I told them upfront, that I would like my baby to be held as much as possible. My aunt gave me that advice because when she ran a daycare she said a lot of moms asked them to not hold their babies as they didn't want the babies to get used to be held. DD1 got held a lot. Even other teachers would hold her during their lunch break. I also never had an issue with bringing in expressed breast milk.

[Carita]

Oh for our colickly babies... a friend of mine just had great sucess w/Florastor Kids a kid probiotic. her LO is 2 weeks old I think and was super fussy & couldn't get the gas out. he was just screaming. her ped suggested the Florastor and it seems to be working like a charm. Just thought I'd share that!

[Peace+Hope]

diet: s to all of us wondering whether or not we need to do more/less. it is confusing. charlie seems the same no matter what i eat. but since that is only fussy and not screaming for a few hours at night, it just doesn't seem diet related anyway.

jsh, sometimes i find myself becoming frustrated even at the beginning of charlie fussing. i agree w/ your "made it to X age" assessment. it is weird having even the one or two plans i may have in a day completely thwarted by this tiny person that shouldn't seem to be able to MAKE me do anything!

LNF, i asked my husband every day for weeks to tell me the story of how charlie ended up in the NICU. i believed in my heart that it was unnecessary, despite the evidence. i was imagining everything really being ok if they had just quit messing with us... i still hate that it happened, but whenever i feel the doubt, i ask for the story from him again. not saying your situation is the same, just sharing... it is terrible the way once they are in the NICU, it's hard to get them back OUT. it starts a who cascade of things they "need" and then, it takes time to ween them back off those things. ugh!! , so glad you are posting here, sounds like you are asking for and getting solid support IRL.

dena, wow, i hope your husband got some more appropriate perspective later . nothing like a crisis of partnership right before you have to plan his birthday party!

jenfl, yay to your little guy improving in his nursing!

gtg, wow, so glad you guys are settled. do be careful to let your body rest after the move! i'm a strong, active person and ended up w/ back spasms that lasted for a few weeks before the acupuncturist fixed them. pregnancy is weird.

LOL, what a lame thing, the ten commandments. totally bizarre. i do agree taht to have noisy, crying babies/children in a nice quiet restaurant can ruin the atmosphere. but how could quietly breastfeeding a baby ruin the ambiance of anyone's dinner, unless that person is a nosey control freak.

mpp, DO tell what you are planning to say if anyone tries to reprimand you for NIP!! i need some good ideas

i'm so fortunate to live in a community where NIP is practically encouraged, and local moms have and will do a nurse-in at offending businesses. i would love to do that sometime. one of our local bars has a babies and beer night, going to try that out when our friends are visiting in june.

dhinderliter, WOW, what a blessing, a find, a serendipity! so glad for you. the packing and moving will happen!



charlie turned 8 weeks last thursday and weighed in at 9lbs 6oz at the dr. yesterday!!! he was 4.7 when he was born on march 25th. he's SO not a preemie anymore, he seems HUGE to us, but everyone does comment on how small he is for his age. he's in the 10th percentile, heehee. but he's also 21 1/2 inches, which seems a "normal" length.

[smeisnotapirate]

P+H - I keep a blanket in my bag, so that if anyone tells me to cover up, I can hand them a blanket and say "we're fine, thanks - I have this if YOU want to cover up" with a very sweet smile. Kinda hoping to get to use it someday.

[loveneverfails]

P+H: I sort of see my daughter's NICU stay as really being two stays. One was absolutely necessary. Babies who aren't breathing need ventilators, and I know how bad her Apgars were from the probable placental abruption. Without that hospital stay, she would not have made it.

It's the other one that I really really believe was not necessary, at least not for as long as it dragged on. From day 4 of our 10 day stay, we were literally sitting in a back room with NO monitoring for respiratory rate, O2 saturation, etc. We literally stayed for 7 days in a lactation consultant's office with a pull out couch, so that she could have antibiotics twice a day. That's it. There is no hard evidence that she ever had a bacterial infection at all, and there is no reason why she could not have received her antibiotics at home with home health care. That's the part that infuriates me, because I cannot for the life of me see how 10 days of antibiotics was necessary. She's somehow sick enough to need to be getting inpatient antibiotic therapy but not sick enough for anyone to take her vitals with anything resembling regularity? That's the sticking point. That's where stuff gets really difficult to understand.

[sew_crafty_girl]

Carita, Anna does the same thing...fusses, mouths, kicks her legs but still reluctantly takes the breast. Her spits are more dribbles though then full out pukes.

This is one of her behaviors I haven't figured out yet. Is she starting to get tired? Is she gassy? Hungry? Bored? Even though she's my third I still feel like a newbie sometimes.

[Carita]

IME its a gas thing - i think thats why she spits up. Also little miss thing wants a dry diaper before eating LOL.

[Knitting Mama]

Originally Posted by smeisnotapirate

P+H - I keep a blanket in my bag, so that if anyone tells me to cover up, I can hand them a blanket and say "we're fine, thanks - I have this if YOU want to cover up" with a very sweet smile. Kinda hoping to get to use it someday.

I did the same thing! Haven't had a chance to use it yet either. Are you a member of the FB group "If breastfeeding offends you, put a blanket over YOUR head"?

[smeisnotapirate]

Originally Posted by Cecilia's Mama

I did the same thing! Haven't had a chance to use it yet either. Are you a member of the FB group "If breastfeeding offends you, put a blanket over YOUR head"?

LOL! Am now!

[jenfl]

Originally Posted by smeisnotapirate

P+H - I keep a blanket in my bag, so that if anyone tells me to cover up, I can hand them a blanket and say "we're fine, thanks - I have this if YOU want to cover up" with a very sweet smile. Kinda hoping to get to use it someday.

That's one of the parts I hate most about these nursing problems -- NIP is such a pain. With DD, I nursed everywhere with no cover-up. But with DS, I have to be in just the right position, he pops off constantly exposing my nipple, I have to constantly be fiddling with my breast to get him back on....

*sigh* Sorry. Having a rough nursing day around here. Those signs I thought might mean he was improving haven't panned out as such. The nursing is disastrous today. So much so that I've pulled out the nipple shield and kinda given up for the day. I'm finding myself getting frustrated with HIM, not the situation, and I hate that.

Seems like I've got a weekly cycle of annoyance -> search for new magic bullet -> resignation -> back to annoyance.

[rhiOrion]

Originally Posted by Peace+Hope

i'm so fortunate to live in a community where NIP is practically encouraged, and local moms have and will do a nurse-in at offending businesses. i would love to do that sometime. one of our local bars has a babies and beer night, going to try that out when our friends are visiting in june.

oooh, what bar? i'll make a point to go to that bar next time i'm up there!

[rhiOrion]

waaaaah! the one thing that made L's colic bearable was the fact that she'd usually pretty much sleep through the night, with maybe one or two nursings.

Blahblahblah.

Not the last two nights. Grrrrr.

I think the Zantac and lack of dairy is making her feel better, so she's been sleeping more during the day. And I guess sleeping for almost 4 hours between 6-10 last night was just too much for her.

I'm sooooooooooo tired.

[loveneverfails]

You know, life is a lot better with dark chocolate raspberry birthday cake for breakfast.

[jenfl]

Originally Posted by loveneverfails

You know, life is a lot better with dark chocolate raspberry birthday cake for breakfast.

Or husband- and daughter-made chocolate chip pancakes and bacon.

[loveneverfails]

OMG YOU SAID BACON!!!!!

*is dead*

[smeisnotapirate]

I hate you all. Chocolate anything would be good right now.

I'm grumpy because today is potty-learning day and it's 9:30 and I've already cleaned up untold amounts of pee. We caught one (well, the second half of one), but this boy dribbles pee all morning long. Little butthead got OFF the potty to pee on the floor.



Tips? I'm realizing that if I could, I would manifest into the Hindu goddess Durga. I could use her 6 arms today.