Did you wait for the "perfect time" in your life to start TTC? - Page 2

[Kyamo]

Yes, we waited over 5 years after we got married. We were waiting for:
1. me to finish school
2. get a house
3. improve financial situation
And now I am discovering that I rarely ovulate and TTC is going to take longer than we thought. So I am wishing we didn't wait so long. Knowing what we know now, I would still have waited for 1 & 2, but 3 was in a "good enough" position by the time 1 & 2 were done.

[laohaire]

I'm not TTC, not sure if this question was just for folks having challenges TTC or for anyone who ever TTC'd.

We did wait a bit until we bought a house. We loved our apartment but it was tiny and had no yard, and I can't imagine raising a child in it. Even though I don't even believe we need much space. What I really would have hated would be raising a baby in a communal house and hearing my downstairs neighbor bang away with her broom on the ceiling every night when DD was up and crying.

So, we saved up, bought a house, closed, moved in. After the dust settled, we looked at each other and said, "ok, I guess now is the time?" But with a big "gulp" from me. We had a bit of role-reversal, I was like the scared husband. My husband was perfectly ready to start a family. For a few months I told him "let's just wait a little" but after a while I realized I wasn't waiting for anything except for this little vague knot of fear to go away. So finally I told DH I was 95% ready and that was as ready as I'd get, so let's go ahead.

I got pregnant the first time we eschewed the birth control. (Sorry, anyone here who might hate me).

Obviously it took me a couple of weeks to realize - I'd read that it takes the average couple, I don't know, 8 months to conceive? I was just in shock for a while.

I believe that some situations are prudent to wait through/work through before TTC. Two parents out of a job, for example, might not be the best time. But on the other hand, I totally agree that you can't wait for THE PERFECT TIME. There rarely is a PERFECT TIME for anyone. Having children is not a goal like paying down debt - it's just LIFE. You make it work, almost no matter what.

FWIW as far as I'm concerned, I conceived on the exact perfect hour of the exact perfect day - I could not love DD any more

[zinemama]

Yes, we waited until we had finished school, were financially secure and owned a house one income could pay for.

We knew that our lives would change in ways we couldn't predict after the baby was born. Going into it having taken care of the things we actually could control is something I will never regret.

[mama2toomany]

I am of the belief that if I waited for everything to be perfect, I wouldn't have any kids at all lol

I also believe in listening to my heart, If my heart is saying NOW NOW! then I would put actions into plan.


If I was in a terrible situation and it just wouldn't be healthy to bring a baby into it, then I would wait. I don't think money is a factor in that though. Babies need love and breastmilk.

[crunchy_mommy]

Originally Posted by mama2toomany

I don't think money is a factor in that though. Babies need love and breastmilk.

Hehee I love how you summed that up.

[TonyaW]

I waited and sincerely regret it. I want more kids and I am not sure I will ever get more. I had my first in 2006 with no issues. Got preggo a 2nd time by accident because I was waiting for a good time, but that baby was very much wanted!!! However, that baby ended in my 1st miscarriage and I was devastated. Went on to have a 2nd miscarriage and an ectopic where I lost a tube. And I supposedly have issues with being able to stay pregnant now. I wish I had started sooner because now I am about to turn 34.

I am just saying, you never know what is going to happen and if you want more kiddos and you can and want to do it, then go ahead. I have a friend whose husband just passed away suddenly at the age of 33. So many things can change and we never know what the future brings.