scared & looking for sharing about alcohol consumption

[jugistar84]

Hi Ya'all,
My name is Judy. I'm 26 years old and i'm 4 1/2 months pregnant.
I'm very scared and nervous as during my pregnancy i have drank alcohol. I drank probably about 7 or 8 times in total and drank 5 or more drinks each time. I have not drank in 2 weeks and plan never to do it again during this pregnancy. Prior to getting pregnant, i drank heavily. I changed the behavior, and have only drank occassionally, but, quite a lot. I also smoked before getting pregnant and have stopped that at the beginning of the pregnancy (about 4 weeks).
I did not drink with my 1st pregnancy. I have a happy 4 year old boy.
My life has changed in the past 2 years and i started drinking more often than i should.
My question is, do you ladies know of women who drank during their pregnancy and the baby was ok? What do you think?
I'm so scared and ashamed and just hope for some input.

Judy

[ASusan]

Kudos to you for stopping BOTH drinking AND smoking during pregnancy. That must be SO hard.

There is a very wide range of responses for how mothers' bodies process alcohol and how fetuses respond developmentally to alcohol. Within that range, there are LOTS and lots of babies who have no noticeable effects on their development. One thing we DO know for sure is that less exposure is better - so you are completely on the right track.

If it makes you feel better, perhaps adding a lot of good fats into your diet would be a good idea. Omega-3 fats are great for brain development - at all points during pregnancy and early infancy.

[RedOakMomma]

I think you might need some organized or professional support. I'm glad you haven't been drinking in the last couple of weeks, but I would get a support system (AA? Treatment?) going so that staying sober is something you're doing with help.

Best of luck to you. I hope the support you find can answer more questions about the effects of drinking on the fetus, and how often this turns out okay. Please get yourself some help.

[jugistar84]

Thank you. I appreciate the input. I have gotten some counseling.
I'm just looking for stories/sharing.
Again, the drinking was not regular, but it happened.
I went weeks at some times without drinking, then i would binge.
I am just worried now if or how the baby might be affected. I have had anatomy scans, both of which the doctor and ultrasound techs say that everything looks good, but again, i am just scared.

[MaerynPearl]

Unfortunately you probably wont know if/how it effected baby until after birth and possibly not for years after birth.

Luckily... IF baby has FAS (and not all babies of women who drink get it, so there's just a chance of it, not 100%) there are ways to help the learning disabilities it can cause and help the children to lead somewhat normal lives.

I suggest, if you want some idea of what MIGHT happen, look into support groups of parents with fetal alcohol syndrome... don't feel the need to join them until your baby/child is actually diagnosed with it (though I am sure they will welcome you to help with your fears if you want to join), but do look into the symptoms that can clue you in... and the ways that they deal with it to help their kids keep up in school.

[Earthy Mama]

While I personally do not feel that the occasional drink is harmful, those who have drinking problems should stay clear of alcohol while pregnant.

I may have a beer once every few weeks, but in your case, I would completely abstain.

[Beltane]

I think one study I read concluded that you would have to drink QUITE HEAVILY and REGULARLY for your baby to have fetal alcohol syndrome. Some folks continue on their 'party ways' and don't realize they are pregnant for a month or two. I'm sure your baby will be fine. Kudos to you for stopping the smoking and drinking.

Edit: Also - so a search here on drinking or alcohol - I believe there were some great studies referenced.

[RedOakMomma]

Originally Posted by Beltane

I think one study I read concluded that you would have to drink QUITE HEAVILY and REGULARLY for your baby to have fetal alcohol syndrome. Some folks continue on their 'party ways' and don't realize they are pregnant for a month or two. I'm sure your baby will be fine.

I don't think anyone can be sure the baby will be fine. Drinking heavily 7-8 times during the first trimester, when the baby is most likely to be harmed by alcohol, should not be dismissed so easily. I agree with a previous poster who said Judy should be aware of the signs/symptoms of FAS/FAE and mentally prepare for that possibility.

It's true the placenta doesn't take over for nourishing the baby until 9 weeks or so, but that still leaves several weeks when this baby was exposed to high amounts of alcohol. Binge drinking late in the first trimester, or any time during pregnancy, is serious stuff.

[jugistar84]

I know it is serious stuff.
I would say 3x were in 1st trimester.
Probably 4x in 2nd. I do take vitamins, exercise every day and try to do other healthy things. I"ve gotten prenatal care since the very 1st month i missed my period...so i am not a neglectful person.
I just slipped up a bit, now regret it, pray it did not hurt him & am looking for sharing.
If i did not know of the risks, i would not be concerned.

[myk]

nobody can be sure the baby is fine. alcohol affects different children very differently. i do know one girl whose biological mother drank during pregnancy, and while she displays only one physical sign of fetal alcohol spectrum disorder, she has no cognitive deficits. i have two neighbors however who are profoundly affected both physically and mentally.

what's done is done. being scared is understandable because you did indulge in a harmful behaviour, but the best thing to do now is a) get every help available to you so you can STOP, not even one more drop and b) educate yourself on what effects your drinking may have so you know what to do when/if baby is affected.

[Jenne]

Okay, I'm not going to tell you your baby is going to be fine because I have no way to know that. You are an alcoholic and are going to have to deal with that temptation for the rest of your life. Please do not take what I'm going to say as tacit approval of your actions nor encouragement to continue drinking.

BUT

Prior to the modern era and the ability to clean and sanitize water most human beings avoided drinking water. Instead they would drink lightly alcholic beverages such as wines, meads, ales, and beer.

I agree with the suggestion to get counseling and attend meetings. Being the child of an off the wagon alcoholic is not easy. My Dad once passed out in the car waiting for me to get off work--having driven to pick me up. Being courageous enough to face your demon now and get the help you need is the best gift you can give your children--regardless of whether this baby has FAS or not.

I wish you the best! I wish you a healthy, strong baby! I wish you years to sobriety to come!

Jenne

[prothyraia]

There are women who drank as much as you have during your pregnancy and gone on to have perfectly healthy babies. It's time to let go of what you can't change and focus on doing the very best you can from here on out.

[Qbear'smama]

You should have a look at this site, very good resource, information and research studies on all kinds of things that relate to pregnancy and different substances, including alcohol:

http://www.motherisk.org/women/index.jsp

When I found out I was pregnant with DD, it was just after DH's big 30th birthday party (I had consumed alcohol) and I was able to find some good info there. I give you credit for making changes and trying to get info. Keep taking care of yourself and your little one.

[Amila]

Before I knew I was pregnant (so 4 or 5 weeks) I drank heavily twice. Baby is perfect. Please get some help- you definitely have an alcohol addiction, and I am so glad that you are trying to stop and do what is best for your baby.

[RedOakMomma]

From the website listed above:

MYTH: "There is no hope for a baby exposed to heavy drug and alcohol use."
FACT: There is always hope. Drug and alcohol use in pregnancy affects each baby differently. Call for information on the risks of birth defects and where to find prenatal support.

The Alcohol and Substance Use Helpline - 1-877-327-4636
offers information and counseling to pregnant and breastfeeding women, their families, and health care providers. Helpline information is based on continuing research and study by Motherisk's specialized team of physicians, psychologists, pharmacologists and counselors.

You can reach us:
•Monday to Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. in each of Canada's time zones

The prevalence of alcohol consumption among women aged 18 to 34 years ranges from 60% to 75%, with 4% considered to be alcohol abusers or alcohol dependent. Lower prevalence has been recorded during pregnancy: 20% among adult women, and less than 1% among alcohol abusers. No evidence, however, indicates that the heavy drinkers are drinking any less during pregnancy. The literature on the prevalence and epidemiology of FAS is far from consistent. According to various studies, the worldwide incidence of infants with FAS ranges from 0.5 to three per 1000 births. This rate reaches 4.3% among heavily drinking mothers. Much more complicated is evaluating the incidence of infants with fetal alcohol effects (FAE), currently estimated to be two to six per 1000 births.

[CherryBomb]

The most important is not to drink any more. 7 or 8 episodes of binge drinking could have hurt your baby. Or not. There's no way to know right now. One or two glasses of wine, I'd say don't worry. But you've basically drank 40 alcoholic drinks in 18 weeks of pregnancy, and that's a lot. Does your doctor know? It's important to have support so you don't drink again. It's easy to say you won't, it's a lot harder to do it. Good luck

[FloridaBorn]

I really found this New York Times article had a more than balanced approach to alcohol and pregnancy: http://www.nytimes.com/2006/11/29/dining/29preg.html

[MaerynPearl]

Thats about moderate or occasional light drinking... neither of which is what the OP is talking about having done.

[Eresh]

If you can get yourself to a bookstore or library, try to find the book "What's Going on in There? : How the Brain and Mind Develop in the First Five Years of Life" by Lise Eliot. There is a good section that is not very long on alcohol consumption during pregnancy and FAS that might reassure you.

I think you already see what you need to do and deserve a big for tackling your problems. You have a very important reason growing inside you now and it sounds like another 4 yr old reason to address your dependency. Good luck.

[rightkindofme]

Basically you are going to get a lot of people wagging their fingers at you because that is what people do. You can listen to them and feel like shit or you can move on with your life doing the best you can. FAS is the bogeyman. Yes, it is serious stuff. It is not a certainty and it is something that you can deal with if you have to. I wouldn't go pushing my luck but what's done is done and you need to just move on. Feeling lots of anxiety and guilt for the rest of your pregnancy won't help you or the baby.

The studies that I have seen show up to 16 drinks a week with no detectable influence. That's a freakload of alcohol. I'm sure it is more problematic to have 5 in a night, but I don't think you are an evil terrible neglectful person. Shit happens. We are human beings. Not everyone is going to think you suck.