Day sleep...

[ann_of_loxley]

Gosh - I hope this doesn't sound terribly neglectful of me...

But how I can help this little one learn to fall asleep - without me having to help him so much?

Is that possible? - Realistic?

I guess I just had it easy with DS1! - When he was tired...erm...he just fell asleep! Wherever he was! It might have helped that he did have a soother. This one won't take a soother - though I think he may end up finding a finger? Who knows! He has a high need to suck - tries to use me for that but the milk is a bit of an issue when he is wanting to suck for comfort.

As it stands - these are the three things we do for daytime sleep times:

1). Swaddle. With lots of walking rocking swaying around. This works the least. Seems to only work a few times a day.

2). The boob. I love this one the best. I could do this till hes four if I am honest! I actually don't mind this one at all! I can lay down with him and if I am lucky, once he is asleep - I can usually get up and get stuff done too ....like, I don't know - use the toilet and eat something! lol But - but but but...this only works maybe once a day. I have to offer the most empty boob. Hes sucking for comfort here. Not for food. So if theres milk - doesn't work for getting him to sleep! (cause hes not hungry - hes just comfort sucking).

(this can be a great long term plan - If either when he goes down to having a nap a day...and that wont be for a year at least! lol...or if we can both work out this supply thing - that could take who knows how long!)

or

3). In the sling. Great for when we are out an about. But this certainly won't be lasting for that long cause hes a bit baby and my body has a limit! lol

I guess DS1 wasn't normal. I wouldn't mind being able to put him down when he is clearly tired and just have this one go to sleep. Or helping him to sleep detached from me for a bit would be a great help - for my back and all the family! .... But how can I go about doing this without neglecting him and/or CIO or something like that. ???

[Knitting Mama]

I have no idea! Cecilia always needs me to fall asleep! Although yesterday she did fall asleep in the swing and stayed asleep for 45 minutes. Maybe it's an age thing? She's just shy of 8 weeks old. All I can say is to keep trying! The way I do it is I put her in the swing awake, and generally she has about 10 minutes before she's had enough (and man, it's amazing what I can get done in 10 minutes!), at which time I take her out before she's screaming hysterically. Yesterday I noticed she was quiet longer than 10 minutes and when I checked on her, she was out. So I guess what I'm saying is don't lose hope!

[maptome]

He may just need you to help him. As you know, all babies are different, and some just need help. Try what you think may help, but don't beat yourself up trying to figure him out.

That's coming from me. I have to nurse and then hold DD until she is totally limp in the arms. She's 10 months now, and I finally wholeheartedly believe that that's just how it's gotta be.

Good luck!

[Norasmomma]

DD was an easy newborn, it wasn't until she was a young toddler life with her was difficult. She slept in a bouncy chair all.the.time. She was a 3 on 3 off kid, so night was harder, day was easier though because I could nap with her.

Along comes DS, he loved sleeping on me, or with DH. He always has had to be held, thank goodness for a Moby wrap it has made a world of difference for a baby who never wants to be put down(months 3-5 though he decided he hated carriers and DH and I tag teamed holding him). He's a boobie boy, I just woke up for the day and spent most of the last 2-3 hours nursing him, gosh I spend much of the night nursing him-he needs the boob to be happy. He never has slept in the bouncy chair, he never even would sit in it. Once in a great while I can lay him down to take a nap, yesterday afternoon he did, but it is rare. FWIW-I'm ok with the fact he rarely naps during the day, because he STTN, if he was on the same schedule as DD I would NEVER get sleep because she won't nap anymore, so this works.

Do you have a wrap? If not I'd invest in one, they are so much more comfortable than a sling and you can attend to daily activities.

[ann_of_loxley]

I have plenty of wraps. A wrap is a sling - its a type of sling. A ring sling is also a type of sling. I have plenty of those too. Also a few SSC and a podegei...the list goes on. I am a HUGE sling wearing mama... I just feel rather hostage to them with this baby and that does make a big difference to my whole out look and feel on life! lol

He was 12lbs 4oz born...so he is already pretty darn big for a baby. And wearing him all day long - seriously... I can fit a fist between my tummy muscles so I also have no back support at all. That will get better over time of course - but right now....

Also - regarding STTN. DS1 did basically from birth as well! lol This one feeds every few hours but I honestly don't mind cause we have the whole side-lying feeding thing down pretty good. I can point my nipple in his general direction and go back off to sleep and we are both sorted then! lol So I really don't mind if this one never STTN! lol - Not napping during the day isn't a problem either - unless that no-nap child is an overtired one. In which case - as a newborn...thats what I end up with if we try and have a life. Like today. He hasn't really slept at all because we decided to go shopping (I needed trousers).

Ill go with Aimee...shes giving me a bit of hope lol...

[Knitting Mama]

Good luck, mama! Currently Cecilia is napping in the swing after being put in there awake for the second day in a row, so I feel like there is hope as Hamish gets older! I did mention that she has taken every single nap and sleep at night since birth on me (until yesterday), right? Honestly, as happy as I am to have a block of hands-free time to do stuff, I am already feeling a bit off because of it. I guess I feel like she's growing up too quickly, and I love love love the cuddly sleepy times we have.

[Carlin]

Good luck s:

My DD napped almost exclusively on my lap after nursing to sleep until she was about 7 months old. Now I can nurse her down and leave her, but it was a long time coming. I struggled with wanting that time to accomplish something for a long time but eventually I learned to appreciate the down time, and to type one handed!

[Norasmomma]

Originally Posted by ann_of_loxley

I have plenty of wraps. A wrap is a sling - its a type of sling. A ring sling is also a type of sling. I have plenty of those too. Also a few SSC and a podegei...the list goes on. I am a HUGE sling wearing mama... I just feel rather hostage to them with this baby and that does make a big difference to my whole out look and feel on life! lol

Uh sorry, I think a wrap is a wrap, and a sling is a sling....I guess I differentiate the styles.

[LadyCatherine185]

Your LO is way to young to learn to go to sleep by himself if he is not ready. My 21 month old still needs a lot of help getting to sleep. You're right, you were very lucky with your first. This is a different kid with different needs. Instead of trying to change him, I suggest trying to change your expectations and just go with what works for now.

Your best bet will probably be to wear your LO for naps for now. Or nurse and roll away when you can. I highly recommend an Ergo or something like that.

[CassnBeth]

For my DD, I had to go into a room with no other people, put up blackout curtains and run incredibly loud white noise. What we did at that point changed based on age (as a teeny baby it was tight swaddle and milk with paci slipped in when asleep followed by transfer to swing) but she was just far, far too alert to simply doze off in public. She lost that ability around...two weeks old? Instead she would stay awake staring at things until she totally melted down from exhaustion.

Oh! And you know that thing where infant sleep cycles are 45 minutes? Knowing that was a big help for me because my daughter's "awake cycles" also ran on multiples of 45. When she was a newborn it was only 45 minutes awake before her next nap no matter how alert she seemed, then it flipped to an hour and a half and now, at almost a year, it is 3 hours from nap1 to nap2.

[LadyCatherine185]

Originally Posted by CassnBeth

For my DD, I had to go into a room with no other people, put up blackout curtains and run incredibly loud white noise. What we did at that point changed based on age (as a teeny baby it was tight swaddle and milk with paci slipped in when asleep followed by transfer to swing) but she was just far, far too alert to simply doze off in public. She lost that ability around...two weeks old? Instead she would stay awake staring at things until she totally melted down from exhaustion.

This was my DS exactly.. except he wouldn't take a paci or tolerate a swing. He also wouldn't nap longer than 15-20 minutes until he was 3-4 months old.

[starlein26]

that he finds a finger! My youngest was the same as your son...hated full breasts...but needed to suck. She found her thumb around 1.5 months...it was AWESOME! I could moby her, and she would stick her finger in and sleep soundly for naps.