Thoughts/suggestions re: IEP evaluation details...

[nayma]

my dd (3, asd) is being evaluated by our public school team later this week, in an effort to draw up an IEP. she's never been in school before, and my hope is that she actually won't be starting school in the fall. our state has an autism scholarship, and it can be used for home programs (RDI)- which is what i hope to do, but i have to have an IEP done first. anyway, i have no doubt that they won't see a realistic version of dd in the setting where she's being evaluated - our home, surrounded by adults. i tried to explain to them that when she's in a public setting surrounded by peers, everything is ten times worse - anxiety, sensory stuff, aggression, etc., but they said "we'll just see what happens."
the question is, should i prep my dd for this visit? if i tell her what's going on, who's coming, what to expect, etc., she'll probably cope reasonably well. if i don't, she'll likely be more thrown off (but more prone to demonstrate typical behavioral difficulties). does that make sense? -i.e., during her asd eval, i prepped her for the ados, and she was a gem. i didn't prep her for the psych testing at all, and, whew, she was off the charts! it was really hard to see her melt so badly, but it gave the evaluation team a more well-rounded picture of her.
thoughts from mamas who have done this before?? thanks!

[Kristine233]

Honestly? All the professionals I've talked to regaurding IEP and other services say to go based on worse days. Having everything prepped and running smooth isn't going to benefit her when it comes to getting services for the things she DOES need help with. If its a good team they are going to know kids act differently in different settings. In that case they include a lot of parent reporting. They generally will ask you questions and have a questionaire for you as well.

I generally prep my son for new things, but in this case I'd want them to see him for the way he is and don't do a lot of prepping. Sugar coating it by purposefully making it go smooth isn't a realisitc picture of him. I don't go to the opposite extreme either. My goal always is for whomever is there to get a snap shot of a day in our lives, as if they've just walked into it.

[Linda on the move]

Originally Posted by nayma

anyway, i have no doubt that they won't see a realistic version of dd in the setting where she's being evaluated - our home, surrounded by adults. i tried to explain to them that when she's in a public setting surrounded by peers, everything is ten times worse - anxiety, sensory stuff, aggression, etc., but they said "we'll just see what happens." :

A well conducted eval will consider information about your DD beyond how she tests one-on-one.

My DD (who is 13) is twice exceptional, and goes GREAT with one on one testing. A little quirky stuff, but she mostly showcases her gifted side. She is, however, barely functional outside out home, and her dx takes into consideration her input from her teachers, the school social worker, and many, many forms filled out by me that document bubble by bubble her differences.

[nayma]

. that didn't do well. i think i feel beyond defeated. i'll try to write more tomorrow.

[SpottedFoxx]

I hope you are okay. What happened??

[Linda on the move]

Originally Posted by nayma

i think i feel beyond defeated.

[BookGoddess]

Originally Posted by nayma

. that didn't do well. i think i feel beyond defeated. i'll try to write more tomorrow.

When you're feeling up to it maybe you can share some of what happened. I hope you're feeling better.

[KestrelDream]

(((hugs)))

I remember when my aspie son had an in home eval years ago. It was such a joke. He was on his best behavior. The evaluator was obviously in the wrong field. She didn't "see" any thing wrong & said he was normal, I was just a paranoid parent.

Sigh. It's tough all around. Remember, we are the experts of our kids. We are their advocates. We know better.

(((Hugs)))) again!

[nayma]

whew. thanks, ladies. the women involved were mostly nice, but like one pp said, dd was thrilled to be tested - lol! she loves stuff like that! she didn't have to truly interact, per se, but could do "fun" things for an hour. they thought she was bright and capable, and didn't "see" the things present in her previous evaluations. i wanted to say, "i have spent over 30,000 hours with her. you have spent ONE!!!" but it won't help. they want the opinion of the "experts," and my knowledge is only a small piece of the pie. i'm SO tired of fighting, and she's only THREE. their knowledge of autism seems limited to stereotypes, and i want to scream, "you are NOT experts!" sorry, i just feel so defeated. after the whole thing i just felt like giving up.

[ericswifey27]

I'm so sorry Mama!

We ran into similar trouble with our local school district for similar reasons when J was preschool aged... It'd be nice to get the courage to say to them hey my child with HFA/ Asperger's is not going to behave like your stereotype of autism. Autism is a spectrum. What about his fine motor skills, hyperlexia, lack of social skills, extreme meltdowns, and echolalia from tv shows.

It seems like if your kid scores high on their test questions and smiles/makes eye contact= "bright child", no autism.

This is the same response we got.

It took over a year later to get a diagnosis through the school, and then additional testing through Regional Center. (there was even debate among the experts- one said Asperger's , one said mild Autism.

Can you get a full developmental assessment through your Children's Hospital/ Health Insurance? Can she be reassessed with other peers present so they can see how she interacts?

I know that defeated feeling, I've been there. Take a rest, then when you're ready start all over again. Maybe this time look in to a child advocate if you can afford one, or through some local autism parent groups you might be able to find free legal counsel etc. about what step to take next.