"Indulging ASD Behavior" (not my quote! but ?s about it) - Page 2

[Lollybrat]

Originally Posted by BetsyNY

My son is 4.5, dx'd PDD-NOS and is hyperlexic. He loves letters. A LOT. Especially X. He gets upset if he can't find the X in a set of letters, will try to fit all the letters in a small container and become hysterical if they won't all fit, etc.

All of his therapists over the years have tried different approaches, and what we've all found works best is using his interest in letters and words to help him navigate the world around him. You can't restrict letters; they're everywhere!

My son is hyperlexic too! When he was younger we taught him everything through the written word. Our house was filled with whiteboards, cue cards, checklists, and post-it notes. Hyperelxia has been our most powerful teaching tool and a wonderful aid to communication. DS is 6 and we still processes what he reads better than what he hears, so we still write things down for him a lot of the time.

OP - my son also loves trains. Personally, I find it to be both a special interest and a stim. When he just lays on the floor with his eyes next to the wheels and rolls a train engine back and forth, that's stimming. When he is figuring out new layouts for his tracks, learning how to build tunnels out of random objects, reading about the history of trains, or making lists of types of train cars, that's a special interest. At age 3, his actions with the trains were more stimming, but as he has gotten older his activites with the trains look more like special interest. It's been a gradual evolution.

My son has a lot of visual stims: flicking his fingers in front of his eyes, watching ceiling fans, running along fences just to see the posts go by. He also does some vocal stimming and physical stuff like spinning in circles and crashing into things. Sometimes he stims because he is bored, sometimes bacuase he is overexcited, anxious, or frustrated. We try to be aware of his feelings when we see this behavior so we can decide if stimming is the best way to fill his need or if we should redirect him to another way of managing his emotions.

[LynnS6]

Originally Posted by Linda on the move

Agreed. The trains don't seem like a stim to be at all, but a special interest. The advice that I received on special interest is to allow them, but work to expand them. Rigid thinking is part of the ASD package, and helping the child to develop some mental flexibility and try new things is good.

So for me, the question isn't whether or not it is OK for your son to play with trains (I think it is) but what new or different thing could you do with trains? Is there some place you could go and walk around real trains? Could you go on a train ride? Get a sticker book about trains? Color a picture of trains? Learn sign language for train related words?

I agree. There's nothing wrong with focused interests. Focused interests are a great way to enter your child's world and then gently draw them into other activities and relationships. It's much easier to expand an interest than it is to replace it.

Furthermore, NT kids have obsessions too. Ds is not on the autism spectrum, but he's gone through periods of obsessions: Garbage trucks from ages 2-4, fire trucks from 4-5, buses from 6-8. Finally at 9, he's 'without' an obsession - well, I think it's morphing into general 'sports', with baseball being his current focus (but not an obsession in the same way).

We went down to the transit center 2-3 times a week last summer to watch the buses come and go. He had enough social savvy to tell his friends that we were 'going for a walk' when they asked (and not to say 'we're going to watch the buses), but he really needed to watch the buses. I didn't mind, because it was a nice way for me to spend time with him. And I have to say, I know a ton about the bus system in Portland because of it.

This sort of hyperfocus can also help someone develop enough specialized knowledge that can lead to a job.

Originally Posted by Kristine233

If a child couldn't sit still for group time (we're talking major moving, lol) I tossed out a rug and told them they could move as much as they wanted as long as they stayed on the rug.

My niece (not ASD in any way) had a rule in K that they had to stay on their carpet squares. According to my sister, she spent a large portion of K standing on her head.

Originally Posted by CarrieMF

The fastest way to stop his stims is his body sock. It calms him & he works.

Which points to the idea that stims are a way to calm the system when it's overloaded. So instead of 'stopping' stims, I'd prefer to encourage kids to find more appropriate stims or to find a way to treat the sensory overload.

And if you watch videos of Bill Gates, he stims. He's married, and holds a steady job.

[kme]

Analog Wife,

I think there is a lot of disagreement "out there" about stims. I tend to take the middle road (as I do with most things having to do with ASD/SPD/ADHD, etc.) I think stims have their place; however, it is probably not best to let the child stim endlessly or in public (if it can be avoided).

My son technically does not have ASD but he has SPD and a language disorder and therefore is quite "autistic-like". He sensory seeks a lot and it looks wierd, quite frankly. He jumps and crashes into things and falls on the floor on purpose. He runs into people and hits things. It is not exactly repetitive, but it is just strange-looking to the "uninitiated"!!

The best book I have read regarding stimming is "Overcoming Autism" by Lynn Koegel (an autism expert) and Claire LaZebnik (a mother of a child with ASD). There is a chapter about stimming and how to decrease it without making a huge deal out of it.

For my son - I have tried to get him to jump only on the trampoline, or go swing, or go to his room and sensory seek in private. He is getting so he knows when he needs to seek, and there are ways for him to do it that don't look so "odd". I understand he feels a real need to do this and that is fine - but I am trying to teach him to do it in a socially acceptable way. Sometimes he forgets, but he is getting better.

Good luck!!

[QueenOfTheMeadow]

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I'm just waiting on an edit and I will reopen the thread. Thanks for your patience.

[QueenOfTheMeadow]

I've had to remove numerous posts, so the thread may seem a bit disjointed. But I hope the important information is still there!

[CarrieMF]

Which points to the idea that stims are a way to calm the system when it's overloaded. So instead of 'stopping' stims, I'd prefer to encourage kids to find more appropriate stims or to find a way to treat the sensory overload.

And if you watch videos of Bill Gates, he stims. He's married, and holds a steady job.

This isn't a clear cut across the board thing though.

In the instance of the kid I work with(whom you quoted me about above) NO his stims are not a way he calms his body. When he stims he is overloaded & as he stims he gets more & more overloaded. Stopping his stims helps him. He is such a severe case of SPD that we've had a very hard time finding a way to treat his sensory needs in order to keep him from overloaded.

Also becuase some people who visually stim get married & have a steady job it doesn't mean that'll work out for all people who visually stim. The type of stimming they do will have an impact. In alot of jobs flapping at your ears or spinning will not be okay, yet finger rolling type stims would be. The boy I work with won't get married & doubtfully will have a job but it has nothing to do with his stims.

[Linda on the move]

Originally Posted by CarrieMF

In alot of jobs flapping at your ears or spinning will not be okay

I totally agree, but I don't think it follows that this fact should have any impact on how one parents a 3 year old with autism.

After all, most behavior shown by neuro typical 3 year olds wouldn't be OK at any job either.

[CarrieMF]

lol, true but it(future after 18yo) is something that should be in the minds of the parents even if it's just to figure out what therapies, schools, etc would be most helpful to that specific child so they are as independent as possible when they get to that point. It is something that is in the mind of all parents, NT or SN, but moreso for SN kids.

[LynnS6]

Originally Posted by CarrieMF

This isn't a clear cut across the board thing though.

True, but I think the point I was trying to make (and not succeeding) is that stims are usually symptom of a child who's having trouble regulating themselves. The child you're talking about clearly gets himself more worked up when he stims. But the trigger is probably sensory overload, right? And it sounds like your solution involves dealing with the sensory overload, part of which means reducing his stims so that they don't rev him up more.

So, if one just says 'don't let a kid stim' without understanding why they're stimming, you're not addressing the underlying issue. Hopefully, as the child gets better at self regulation, the stims will reduce. now, they may need some very very focused work to work on self regulation, and they will probably need to learn to replace stims that are socially distracting with ones that aren't.

Originally Posted by CarrieMF

In alot of jobs flapping at your ears or spinning will not be okay, yet finger rolling type stims would be.

True. But having a tantrum because your coworkers wouldn't let you do the job you wanted to do wouldn't be OK in jobs either. Yet that's how my ostensibly NT 6 year old reacted yesterday to being told she couldn't be a princess in a game.

In her case, I'm assuming that the difficulty in self regulation will be solved by development and a bit of intervention in helping her learn self regulation techniques.

But that's the thing -- how do we know which of these things our kids will outgrow without any help, how do we know which ones they'll need a little help with and which ones they'll need a lot of help with? But remember that if your child is three, there's a lot of time for development.

[LynnS6]

Originally Posted by Linda on the move

After all, most behavior shown by neuro typical 3 year olds wouldn't be OK at any job either.

OK this is what happens when you take 2 hours to make a post (there was dinner and chores in the middle there!) -- someone else says what you want to say more quickly and more wittily!