Nursing manners for an 18mo?

[rockportmama]

She's driving me nuts! I'm not remotely ready to wean, & neither is she. But the wiggling, scratching, switching sides, etc is getting annoying. How to teach her better manners? I've caught myself skipping nursing sessions because I'm really seriously running out of coping skills.

I've even nearly stopped nursing her in public because she keeps pulling my shirt waaaay open. I nursed her brother in public until he was two. She's so much calmer than he is. Why is she harder to deal with???

Thanks in advance, wise mamas, for any and all ideas & advice!

[D_McG]

I never allowed any of that. I remind gently and if she can't control herself then we stop nursing. Might sound harsh but it's not, really. It's my body and I get to say what happens to it. If I let her do all that then I'd end up weaning for sure. All that stuff drives me totally insane. I have no patience for it.

[298mom]

I agree - you've got to set limits to keep yourself happy with nursing. How to do that is the tricky part, of course. =) And some of that depends on how verbal/communicative your daughter is.
When dd wanted to switch 20 times (5 seconds per side with lots of wiggles and crazies), I established the rule of "once per side" for each nursing. She quickly learned to settle down and nurse if she really wanted to.
We had problems with her pulling up my shirt, too, because at home I let her, to keep her face uncovered. In public, I just had to have a hand free to hold my shirt down, and if she struggled to pull it up, I just told her it stayed down or we would just nurse later.
It's tricky - I remember being SOOO ready to wean during that stage. But once we had an understanding of the "rules" of nursing, it was much easier. (We're still nursing at 2y4mo.)
Good luck!

[lifeguard]

Whether we're at home or in public (which really is rare nowadays) I keep the rules basically the same. If he isn't able to settle in & be calm(ish) than I stop the session & put him down. I've been very consistent with it & it didn't take him long to figure it out. I just couldn't handle be treated like a jungle gym with my nipple being pulled every which way.

[Shanny2032]

I agree with PP's and started with some "rules" around 9 months and she is more than capable now at 18 months of understanding them. Because I have had a horrible case of recurring thrush I say "big big big" before she latches on. If it is still uncomfortable I can say "off, try again please". It only takes a few times for her to get the key phrases and now she says "bi bi bi" for big big big! Nothing gets through to a wanna be nurser than ending the session and setting them down and telling them something is not OK!

[rockportmama]

Thanks, mamas!

We're working on some limits. I'm trying to introduce them gradually. Saying something to her when she first starts up instead of waiting till it's bad enough to bother me seems to really help.

The thing that has surprised me the most is that often when I put her down for wiggling, she just walks away -- happy as a clam! Maybe she was just nursing for something to do? Seeing where her limit was? Making sure she could get my attention?

Thanks again for the support! It's such a relief to be able to complain & not get told to wean her, already!!

-rockport-