Running into the STREET

[PennyGadget]

My 2.5 year old boy has been continually running away from me for weeks now. I've been giving him talks on the naughty chair and even went as far as giving him a spank (over his diaper) one time after he deliberately looked at me and ran toward the street. Long talks about dangers of the street don't seem to phase him. The spank seemed to egg him on. I NEED advice because I think I'm making the problem worse. Please help if you've experienced this. Thanks!

[lil_miss_understood]

went through this with ds1 years ago. First thing I did was buy him a harness. Then I would take him out in it for deliberate "training" sessions to teach him to hold my hand at the street- he could go ahead in the harness but only as far as the "leash" allowed (about 3 feet). When he learned the basics (Don't go on the street, stop at corners and hold mom's hand to cross the street), he "graduated" to not needing the harness. If he didn't listen for some reason, the consequence was having to wear the harness again for a week.
hth.

[Happiestever]

This just reminded me to look for our harness. I really hate living in a busy area only because of the traffic.

[blessedwithboys]

welcome to MDC!

i wouldnt spank, and i wouldnt use a "naughty" chair. what i would do is eliminate the chance of him runnign off altogether. put him on some type of harness/leash. he will be secure but still have freedom to walk away form you a few feet, and soon enough the phase will have passed and you can put it away for the next one.

and please feel free to visit the Gentle Discipline area for some good strategies that dont involve physical punishment.

[mtbmomma]

We don't use naughty chairs, spank or believe in using harnesses, but have had the same problem with our 18 month DD. What has worked for us is telling her where it is safe to run (only on the grass). Also we remind her when we head outside that if she must stay on the grass, and if she runs away we will go inside immediately, and we stick with this. We also don't let her stray more than a couple feet from us, so when she does run we can say sternly "on the grass", and if she doesn't turn around right away, we grab her and go right inside. Then when we are in a safe place we explain why we aren't playing outside anymore, and how we hope she can play in a safe place next time we go outside.

[MountainMamaGC]

Sometimes we have to work with our childs capabilities. Your child may not be able to understand the danger of the situation. Use a harness or always hold his hand until he can understand why he shouldnt run into the street. There is nothing wrong with it.

My DD is pretty good about it but there are certain areas where she must hold my hand no matter what.

[almadianna]

i would not use spanking as this is not a way to effectively or gently teach much of anything.

[crunchy_mommy]

Can you describe the situations where he is most likely to run off? At this age, I would focus on minimizing risk rather than expecting him to 'learn' or 'listen' (and I definitely would not spank, use a naughty chair, etc.) So some possible solutions, depending on the situations, might include using a harness on walks, putting up a fence in your yard, carrying him in parking lots, visiting only fenced parks/playgrounds, etc.

He is too young to fully understand and his impulse control is still so minimal... He doesn't understand the danger. He probably also thinks it's fun because then you chase him... so maybe play chase in a safe place so he can still enjoy that. Also focus on what he CAN do rather than what he can't. So "don't run in the street!" might be "hold Mommy's hand" or "stay on the grass"...