Charting to Avoid/Fertility Awareness, June 2010 - Page 3

[MovingMomma]

Annie, huge

I think I finally O'd, but on CD 41, not CD 39, like FF says. My chart. I need more temps to confirm, and I've been temping within about an hour's range instead of at the exact same time, so my temps are not as clear as they would be otherwise. If next cycle is this long it'll be the last one before DH comes home & then we'll likely be neither TTC nor TTA.

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by AnnieA

Congrats to all the ladies graduating. I must say, it makes me feel like this though DH and I had a talk the other night and I don't foresee that we will ever TTC. In fact, without Divine Intervention, I don't foresee that I will ever have a child. I just feel broken by this whole process.

Annie. I feel sad, too, when I read about everyone getting prepared to TTC. I will never TTC again. Even though I have felt very overwhelmed with my boys that last few months, I still desperately want a girl. I was obsessing over that last night in bed. If I don't get pg with a girl by accident, I wondered if I could somehow talk my dh into adopting a 2-3yo girl. (My dh has always been very opposed to adoption. I have no idea why.) I may get pg again by accident. Depends on how diligent my dh is about w/d. That doesn't mean I will have another baby. With 6 m/cs I'm rather pessimistic about that, especially as I get older.

It's actually been kind of weird. Normally, during my lp the idea of another baby seems totally crazy while during my fertile cycle that's all I think about. It's been the opposite this cycle. Now that I'm halfway through my lp I'm thinking that things have been so good the last few days that maybe I could handle another baby.

[lyterae]

Originally Posted by MovingMomma

Annie, huge

I think I finally O'd, but on CD 41, not CD 39, like FF says. My chart. I need more temps to confirm, and I've been temping within about an hour's range instead of at the exact same time, so my temps are not as clear as they would be otherwise. If next cycle is this long it'll be the last one before DH comes home & then we'll likely be neither TTC nor TTA.

Woo! Hopefully I will O soon as well

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by lyterae

DH was tired of waiting and decided that he was okay with the possibility of a baby next winter. So I guess we'll see what happens this cycle.

You do realize if you get pg this month or next you'll be due in the spring, right?

Shannon ~ I think cd41 looks more likely, too.

[AnnieA]

Lyterae: Perhaps you are finally gearing up to O? Do you typically have a temp drop before O?

Thanks for the hugs everyone. It really helps to have an outlet to express my pain. I don't feel like I can talk to my DH about it because then he thinks I am trying to guilt him in to having a child.

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by MarineWife

You do realize if you get pg this month or next you'll be due in the spring, right?

Shannon ~ I think cd41 looks more likely, too.

Well, technically, Feb/March/Apr is still VERY much winter in Michigan! I lived in Michigan when I went to college.

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by AnnieA

I don't feel like I can talk to my DH about it because then he thinks I am trying to guilt him in to having a child.

That's sad. Could you explain to him that you just need someone to talk to about how you feel and you'd like for it to be your life partner? My dh automatically thinks I want him to fix things when I bring up a problem or something I'm upset about. I have to explain to him every time that I just want to talk about it. I don't want him to do anything about it.

If he feels guilty, that's his problem, whether you are trying to make him feel guilty or not. One person cannot make another person feel anything. People allow themselves to feel whatever it is. If he's reading guilt into what you are saying, that's because he does feel guilty about it. He's not 100% comfortable with and confident about his decision. Maybe he has a reason for feeling guilty, like the fact that he knows his decisions causes you so much pain and he can't fix it.

On the flip side, it sounds like you are feeling guilty about him feeling pressured. You shouldn't feel guilty about your desire to have a baby. It's a normal, natural, biological, evolutionary instinct and it's very strong. It's the purpose of life; to survive and pass on our genes.

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by AnnieA

Well, technically, Feb/March/Apr is still VERY much winter in Michigan!

Oh, hehe, I didn't even check where she was.

[lyterae]

Originally Posted by MarineWife

You do realize if you get pg this month or next you'll be due in the spring, right?

His theory was that we have a birthday in January (his), a birthday in February (dd), so March should obviously be next

Annie - I can't say whether or not the temp drop is "normal", and I know I skewed my temps by sleeping without clothes. Some months it seems to drop before hand, other months it doesn't... It does seem like they are "stable" at least though (provided the past two days are just based on less clothing).

[lyterae]

Originally Posted by MarineWife

Oh, hehe, I didn't even check where she was.

I'm in northern Michigan, in the "snow-belt".

Winter usually lasts a long time for us, it starts in October (normal time of the first snow) and ends in late April. This year has been odd as it's been warm.

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by lyterae

I'm in northern Michigan, in the "snow-belt".

Winter usually lasts a long time for us, it starts in October (normal time of the first snow) and ends in late April. This year has been odd as it's been warm.

Now that I think of it, it was snowing when I brought ds1 home from the hospital. That was in northern Virgina. He was born March 11. I've been in Hawaii and eastern NC too long. I've forgotten what winter is.

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by MarineWife

That's sad. Could you explain to him that you just need someone to talk to about how you feel and you'd like for it to be your life partner? My dh automatically thinks I want him to fix things when I bring up a problem or something I'm upset about. I have to explain to him every time that I just want to talk about it. I don't want him to do anything about it.

If he feels guilty, that's his problem, whether you are trying to make him feel guilty or not. One person cannot make another person feel anything. People allow themselves to feel whatever it is. If he's reading guilt into what you are saying, that's because he does feel guilty about it. He's not 100% comfortable with and confident about his decision. Maybe he has a reason for feeling guilty, like the fact that he knows his decisions causes you so much pain and he can't fix it.

On the flip side, it sounds like you are feeling guilty about him feeling pressured. You shouldn't feel guilty about your desire to have a baby. It's a normal, natural, biological, evolutionary instinct and it's very strong. It's the purpose of life; to survive and pass on our genes.

I think he does feel guilty for a variety of reasons. He has four kids already. We're not in a position to be able to provide for them for college and I think that gives him a huge amount of guilt. The presence of these kids in some ways is the reason why we can't have kids. And his new reason the other night was he'd like to be able to retire one day and not have to work forever.

I do feel guilty about the "biological urge". DH thinks that it is entirely unreasonable for rational thinking humans to not be in control of their emotions. So this loud, screaming voice in my head that is telling me to make a baby with my DH has to be ignored at all costs.

[BarefootScientist]

AnnieA I really hope you somehow get the child you want.

Congrats and good luck to everyone who is going to TTC. However...

Originally Posted by OSUvet

I am joining the bandwagon of not avoiding anymore after this cycle! So Kcroto, echospiritwarrior, BFS... I'm following you guys, and really excited!!

I'm not sure if I should really be in the list. Like I said, nothing is official yet.

What's with all the randomly short LPs? Something in the water?

I still haven't bought my new thermometer yet. CD 4 today. I have had the lightest AF ever this cycle. Too bad it didn't coincide with fewer cramps.

[mom2cash]

I'm joining you gals! Just started charting again after my first PP AF... only made it (almost) 7 months this time without a cycle- was kind of hoping she would stay away a little longer . We'll see what happens this month... just wondering how low is considered "low" BBTs? This morning my temp was 96.3 and that seemed really low. I know the thermometer isn't misreading because my other temps were in the 96.9-low 97s range and it registered a temperature on my kids last week.

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by mom2cash

I'm joining you gals! Just started charting again after my first PP AF... only made it (almost) 7 months this time without a cycle- was kind of hoping she would stay away a little longer . We'll see what happens this month... just wondering how low is considered "low" BBTs? This morning my temp was 96.3 and that seemed really low. I know the thermometer isn't misreading because my other temps were in the 96.9-low 97s range and it registered a temperature on my kids last week.

Welcome! That's a little low and if you are having other symptoms, I would suggest asking your dr to test your thyroid levels.

[mom2cash]

Originally Posted by AnnieA

Welcome! That's a little low and if you are having other symptoms, I would suggest asking your dr to test your thyroid levels.

Thanks! I will keep an eye on it... I emailed my midwife this morning to ask about it because she was the one who mentioned low BBTs & thyroid function when I was doing my prenatal visits with her. She has a relationship with a chiropractor that deals with thyroid issues as well so I may need to pay them a visit if I keep getting consistently low temps like this. I had some serious postpartum issues (emotionally, physically) that may have been thyroid-related after having my son almost 3 years ago and I would really like to stay on top of it if I can.

[echospiritwarrior]

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes

My DH was worried when I took out my IUD, but he's definitely happier now that my libido is back, as well!

I removed mine too but after a it caused. Even though I the non hormonal one (paragard) I think my libido still increased.

Originally Posted by AnnieA

Congrats to all the ladies graduating. I must say, it makes me feel like this though DH and I had a talk the other night and I don't foresee that we will ever TTC. In fact, without Divine Intervention, I don't foresee that I will ever have a child. I just feel broken by this whole process.

big gigantic for you Annie, you're making me want to

It was really hard for me the wanting but waiting but I sat down and wrote DH a long list with all of the pros and cons of why I felt the way I did and after a month or so he came around. Have you tried writing your DH? I think you have some very valid points and hopefully he will understand. It can't hurt anything.

Originally Posted by lyterae

I'm so sorry Annie

I also send my congratulations to those graduating, I can't wait until it's my turn!

I've screwed up my temps now by not wearing pajamas the past two days. I think I'll need to find a pair, it's supposed to be cooling down anyway.

We are currently "whatevering", DH was tired of waiting and decided that he was okay with the possibility of a baby next winter. So I guess we'll see what happens this cycle. I know that if nothing comes out of it we'll be back to fully CTA next cycle.

I hope your turn will come quickly! How can you emotionally handle going from whatevering to TTA, that would be so rough on me! I'm surprised that jammies made such a difference!

Originally Posted by MarineWife

Annie. I feel sad, too, when I read about everyone getting prepared to TTC. I will never TTC again. Even though I have felt very overwhelmed with my boys that last few months, I still desperately want a girl. I was obsessing over that last night in bed. If I don't get pg with a girl by accident, I wondered if I could somehow talk my dh into adopting a 2-3yo girl. (My dh has always been very opposed to adoption. I have no idea why.) I may get pg again by accident. Depends on how diligent my dh is about w/d. That doesn't mean I will have another baby. With 6 m/cs I'm rather pessimistic about that, especially as I get older.

It's actually been kind of weird. Normally, during my lp the idea of another baby seems totally crazy while during my fertile cycle that's all I think about. It's been the opposite this cycle. Now that I'm halfway through my lp I'm thinking that things have been so good the last few days that maybe I could handle another baby.

looks like I got another stair step again this month I'm not so good at figuring those ones out. I can't tell what day I Oed, anywhere from CD 20-24 is my guess, what do you think?

[MovingMomma]

echo: I don't see O yet on your chart anywhere.

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by MovingMomma

echo: I don't see O yet on your chart anywhere.

I agree. I don't see O yet.

[lyterae]

Originally Posted by echospiritwarrior

I hope your turn will come quickly! How can you emotionally handle going from whatevering to TTA, that would be so rough on me! I'm surprised that jammies made such a difference!

I'm still basically figuring that we are CTA and that it will still be a year or so before we are actively TTC. I'm trying not to worry too much either way, easier said than done! The idea of actively TTC is nerve wracking also though, so I'm just going to try and ignore it for now.

I think it's a combination of jammies and stripping the extra blankets from the bed, I think adding the jammies back will bring me back to normal temps.