going to PS

[jeteaa]

dd1 is 5 (6 this July). We hsed for preschool years and thought we would con't on hsing ALL though the school years.... With this school year (K) coming to an end, I have hesitantly made the decision to enroll her in public school. Hsing was WAY TOO exhausting for ME and my dd1 needs exposure to things I can't offer her. She will enter into K, with a july b-day, she will probably be one of the oldest in her class. But she IS NOT ready for 1st. Coming from a hsing mentality, I have FEARS about PS. I'm hoping some of you schooling mamas can share your experiences w/ your dc in PS.
My fears are:
The school day will be too long.
dd1 is a gentle soul, I think she will often get her feelings hurt by other kids.
we love to travel, and spring/fall are the best times for dh, but the schools seem VERY strict about kids NOT missing any school!
Class sizes are large (about 25), I think there will be alot of wasted time w/ the teacher trying to manage that many students.

These are my main fears for now.

[whatsnextmom]

The school day will be too long.

She may be tired at first but I haven't known any kids who didn't adapt. It may mean a firmer bedtime (if that isn't already the case.) You'll want to figure out her best afterschool routine whether it's to grab a snack and jump right into homework like mine or go play outside for an hour before being expected to do anything like homework, chores, ect.

dd1 is a gentle soul, I think she will often get her feelings hurt by other kids.

Just expect that this will happen at some point and understand that it could and would happen with pretty much any group of kids in or out of school she spends time with. It won't neccessarily harden her or change the little girl you know and love. Prepare her in advance by role playing some scenarios and practicing some reactions. Being prepared will not only teach her YOUR reasonings for why people would say hurtful things before it happens (like, "I don't want to be your friend anymore) but also give her some tools for handling it.

we love to travel, and spring/fall are the best times for dh, but the schools seem VERY strict about kids NOT missing any school!

We haven't found this a problem at all. Most schools offer something like an "independant study contract." At our school, if you are going to be gone for 5 days or more, you put in the paperwork in a timely fashion and all the school work is send with you. My kid's teachers often adapted the homework to fit the trip like writing an essay on something they saw for language arts, ect. We had the kids do the work on the plane or car trips and it was nice not to have them go back with all that work to make-up. On independant study contract, it's like your child is actually there. The school gets their money and no marks go against your child. We've done this 3 or 4 times no problem.

Class sizes are large (about 25), I think there will be alot of wasted time w/ the teacher trying to manage that many students.

Yes, there is wasted time in the classroom but most kids find ways to make it enjoyable. My DS is allowed to play on the computers when his work is done. He loves this. My DD always prefered reading or writing her own material. Learn what the options are and go over them with your child.

Personally, school has been overwhelmingly positive for both our kids. Though we've always been clear that homeschooling is an option, they've always been adamant about being in school. They love their teachers. They enjoy the extras like school choir practice, science clubs, recess games, assemblies, ect. They look forward to going to school in the morning and have lots to share when they come home. My youngest had some bully issues in 3rd grade but the school took it very seriously and nipped it in the bud. My oldest hasn't had any trouble like this at all.

Also remember, if it doesn't work, it's not like you don't have options.

[oceanbaby]

We've been hs'ing since the beginning - ds1 is 9 and is in 3rd grade, and ds2 will turn 6 in July (like your dd) and is in K this year.

Ds1 requested (strongly) to go to school, so he is going to start 4th grade this fall at our local public school. We decided to have ds2 start as well, because with both of them in school, I could work a bit more and it would help us get ahead financially.

Ds1 is a ball of energy, loves new situations and new people, and I think will do just fine.

However, I am very concerned about ds2 going into school. He will be entering first grade - academically he is way too advanced to do Kindergarten again, and he would be bored out of his mind. However, he too is a gentle soul, and he moves at his own pace. He is a dreamer, always dancing or singing, and is very sensitive to harshness. Just the idea of the bell ringing makes me scared for him - it seems so jarring for him. He doesn't freak out at loud noises or anything, but you can tell they kind of scare him. And he takes a long time to get his words out - most people who don't know him simply aren't patient enough to listen to what he has to say, and he gets very hurt and frustrated when this happens. I am trying to envision how this is going to work in a classroom of 20 kids.

I am so worried about his sweetness being lost as he adapts to survive in a loud, fast paced kind of environment. We considered sending him to a small private Montessori school, but they had no openings for first grade.

So anyhow, I completely understand your worries. I know that I can pull him out at any time, but the whole dynamic will be different with ds1 still in school - they are best buddies and play together all day. Plus, I feel nervous about finding the balance between giving it a decent shot at getting through a rocky transition and knowing when to pull the plug. If things are too much for him the first day or two, I envision mornings of screaming and crying, begging not to go, and I have no idea how I will handle that.

[happysmileylady]

Originally Posted by jeteaa

The school day will be too long.

My dd was a HORRIBLE sleeper, until she started full day school. We went from it taking 3+ hours for her to go to sleep, to her actually ASKING to go to bed.

dd1 is a gentle soul, I think she will often get her feelings hurt by other kids.

She will get her feelings hurt. But sometimes, that's not really a bad thing. Kids learn best through experience and it's hard to really learn how to deal with hurt feelings and such, unless the child experiences it. But, at the same time you and she might discover that she's such a social butterfly that everyone just loves her.

we love to travel, and spring/fall are the best times for dh, but the schools seem VERY strict about kids NOT missing any school!

Most schools do allow for some absences and most schools will not even count a pre arranged absence against those. And if you know ahead of time you are going somewhere, you can arrange to get the work in advance. Also, you might be surprised to find how much the kids are OUT of school. It's actually fairly easy to plan vacations around the weeks when they are out two days or whatever.

Class sizes are large (about 25), I think there will be alot of wasted time w/ the teacher trying to manage that many students.

Yeah, with larger classes like that it can be hard to avoid wasted time. But I remember when I was in school, I always used that time to read read read. And a lot of teachers allow kids to work on other things, or use the computer or something for times when they finish their work and are waiting on other kids.

[mattemma04]

I am sure you will find most of your fears will not be an issue,and if they do come up you will be able to deal with them well and move on. Be positive and hope for the best.

Had my ds not had problems with bullying that went unresolved he would probably still be in public school.He liked the work and routines of school. My dd on the other hand did not like public school at all. Each child will have different needs and learning styles. You do your best to meet those needs. Best wishes!

[zebra15]

Not to hijack your thread but where is 25 considered a 'large class'? I HS but I also teach (subbing again this year). Our state continues to have budget cuts and classes are scheduled to have 35 kids and counting, yes thats early elementary school....Anytime a sub shows up and there are less than 40 kids, its a good day LOL.

Other than that Im sure your DD will adjust just fine. Kids move in and out of school on a regular basis, some for HS, some to relocate. They adjust to the class and school.

There is alot of 'classroom management time' but that is to be expected. Each teacher will have his/her own style on that.

[whatsnextmom]

Not to hijack your thread but where is 25 considered a 'large class'?

California guidelines are 20 max through 3rd grade. However, with the budget cuts, it's not a requirement. However, most schools in our county are still trying to retain that. Through 3rd grade, niether of my kids ever had classes bigger than 21 students. DD's 4th and 5th grade classes jumped to 35 with a paid classroom aide. DS's current 4th grade class is 30 and will be the same next year... no aide.