Christians - Help me find a church - Page 2

[LynnS6]

I think it might be helpful to separate theology from the other characteristics of a church that you need.

For me, I need a church that's got a liberal theology and non-literal interpretation of the Bible. That rules out quite a few denominations. I'm quite happy ELCA Lutheran (ELCA = Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, which despite its name is the least evangelizing church I know!).

I suspect you'd find the service not what you like. But then I grew up Catholic, and love the fact that the Lutheran services is essentially the same. I've grown to appreciate the Lutheran's teachings about Grace.

The other characteristics that I like are: traditional service, a focus on community service/outreach, a decent youth program, and a medium-largish size. I also like it to be a decent place to socialize. I can't imagine being comfortable in a megachurch. I know I'm not comfortable in a very small church. I like a church with 2-3 pastors, and an active youth program (but it doesn't have to be huge).

Then beyond that are the characteristics of the current congregation. Do you like hanging out with them? Are they interesting? Welcoming? That depends on the vagaries of who's there, but it is as important as size, youth program, etc. Unfortunately, it takes a while to find out. I found recently that I've quit going to the adult education hour at our church not because I don't like the education, but because I'm having more fun chatting over coffee. I don't quite know how to figure out this aspect from the outside.

It took us a while to 'live into' our current church. But if you've been at yours for 5 years, and don't feel at home, it's time to keep looking.

If you made a list like I did, what's on it? What theology? How big is too big? How small is too small? What can you live with? What can't you live without? (My dh couldn't live without an organ; odd but true.)

[happydance]

absolutley - (seperating theology from other characteristics.)

Non-Literal translation exists??? Now I am going to have to check that out.

[lolar2]

Originally Posted by happydance

absolutley - (seperating theology from other characteristics.)

Non-Literal translation exists??? Now I am going to have to check that out.

Non-literal interpretation is more common than non-literal translation. And yes, non-literal interpretation not only exists, but is very common; but not knowing where you are, we can't promise that it exists at a location convenient to you.

[happydance]

Originally Posted by lolar2

Non-literal interpretation is more common than non-literal translation. And yes, non-literal interpretation not only exists, but is very common; but not knowing where you are, we can't promise that it exists at a location convenient to you.

That is very cool. What are some examples of denominations that do this? Obviously Lutheran.

[lolar2]

Sometimes there are intra-denominational variations; for example, Methodist churches run the gamut from very literal to very nonliteral. Episcopal churches are usually less literal but not always. Likewise Presbyterians.

I may be wrong but I'm getting the impression that you like a more free-form worship style but a non-literal interpretation. That combination can be a bit harder to find. It also depends on which parts of the Bible you do and don't take literally, which can vary somewhat.

I can probably give you more suggestions but I'd need more information from you. PM me if you don't want to get more specific here. Have you tried the Belief-O-Matic quiz on Beliefnet?

[lolar2]

Disclaimer: I am a UU, not a Christian. However, UUs and Christians obviously share common roots; and I have worked in Christian churches and also have studied a lot of church history as part of my musicology field.

[Mandala126]

I was in the same place as op until we found a Calvary Chapel church. It's nondenominational, straight Bible teaching, verse by verse so the pastors don't skip the difficult passages. None of the things mentioned in op. It's real, it feels real, not fake. You come as you are. I'm hooked, I'll never look for another church. Their churches are all over the country.

[lolar2]

OP, I was thinking about this thread and, if it's available in your area, from what you describe you might like an American Baptist church (not Southern Baptist, they are different denominations). http://www.abc-usa.org/

The usual disclaimers apply, individual churches vary, etc.

[happydance]

ok I will check. Thank you. I am just so thrilled that you can find churches that dont take the bible literally. LOL. I maybe should have known that - but its news to me!

[lolar2]

Well, if it's news to you, you might be living in a region where you are too far away from any of those churches to attend them. But of course you'll never know if you don't check them out. Are you anywhere near a big city? Most big cities have some of every denomination in them, in the US. I'm pretty sure the Catholic church also isn't completely literal about the Bible, although they are very conservative-- they don't allow homosexuality or divorce, but they don't believe that the Bible is historically perfect (as far as evolution and some of the more fantastical battle stories in Joshua and that sort of thing). ("They" being the official doctrine-makers of the church; individual Catholics have varying beliefs.)

[LynnS6]

Coming back to this thread after a bit -- you might want to try United Church of Christ too. There's great variety among individual churches since they don't have a central body that enforces practices. But some are definitely non-literalist. The one near us is quite liberal and has a relatively free form service as well.

FWIW, there are divisions among Lutherans too. The ELCA (Evangelical Lutheran Church in America) has a non-literal interpretation of the Bible, but other Synods (that's what the Lutherans call the organizing bodies) have more conservative views. The Missouri Synod is more conservative (they don't let women serve as pastors, for example), and the Wisconsin Synod is even more so.

But many mainline protestant churches fall somewhere that you might like - Methodist, Presbyterian, American Baptist, UCC, ELCA, Congregational...

[Bluegoat]

Literalist interpretations of the Bible are pretty much a post-Enlightenment thing, so if you look for groups that pre-date that, you may find a non-literalist approach.

[thebigfam]

I would really recommend a Church Of Christ. It is usually fairly conservative but for the right reasons. I have been all around the country to all different kinds of Christian Churches and the one where I feel more at home and most accepted is a COC. The people are real and love you for you and try to help you be who Christ wants you to be. Just my $.02

Big momma

[lilyka]

I recommend the Orthodox church. Well, I recommend that to everyone regardless of what you are looking for in a church. It is probably not what you are looking for but it wasn't what I was looking for either. Thats one of the things I liked about it. They didn't care if I came, if I stayed and they weren't trying to beg me into the congregation. they were serving God, they were convinced they were doing it right and thay didn't care if it appealed to me and my self serving needs. I have never been so challeneged or grown so much. Despite all the churches and programs and ministries I was involved in. I really think if it is that hard to find a church that fits your lists of desires perhaps one should reconsider their desires, why they are going to church and what not.

as for changing the names to leave out the denomination....that is intention and a strategic plan as a result of market research that is saying people are leaving main line denominations in favor of non denominational churches (I used to be involved with churh plants) about the worst thing a new church (or old church for that matter) can do is have a denomination plastered on its sign. So they start new churches that share buildings with old churches but they give them hip new names and eventually they will take over. but the denomination is still pulling the strings. I am pretty neutral about this. I don't mind knowing that a church has a history, doctrinal statement and leadership. So long as they are not lying then I don't have a problem with it. If people didn't need a sales pitch there wouldn't be one.

[Katala]

Originally Posted by thebigfam

I would really recommend a Church Of Christ. It is usually fairly conservative but for the right reasons. I have been all around the country to all different kinds of Christian Churches and the one where I feel more at home and most accepted is a COC. The people are real and love you for you and try to help you be who Christ wants you to be. Just my $.02

Big momma

To the OP, I just wanted to mention that as is my understanding COC (as well as Calvary Chapel which was mentioned earlier in the thread) teach biblical-literalism (Big Momma, please correct me if I'm mistaken about this.) so if that's not something that you feel comfortable with you probably would not want to consider those types of churches.

Also, I'm genuinely curious, Big Momma (and I hope this doesn't come across as confrontational, because that's certainly not my intention all--I'm just genuinely curious as to what you meant) what does "conservative for the right reasons" mean?

Also, I think way earlier in the thread someone mentioned Disciples of Christ, which is (Again, in my very limited understanding) closely related to COC but more liberal in the sense that they are supportive and accepting of gay people and women have equal rights and privileges in the church.

This is just my own experience, but when I was still trying to practice Christianity, someone told me about DOC and I was excited to find a gay-friendly, women-friendly, child-friendly church in my conservative town that had more of a "contemporary style" worship service (i.e., rock band, informal atmosphere, and in-church coffee shop...and it wasn't a mega church.)
The first time I went I really enjoyed it, the sermon was about cultivating a positive attitude and rejoicing because God loves you, etc. (very unity-esque!) but the second time I went a young woman who was in college stood up to give a "testimony" and talked about how she and the other youth from the church went on a "mission trip" which involved sidewalk evangelism on spring break.
I sat there in shock and cried...I literally had to keep myself from sobbing, I was so dissapointed. Everyone in the church was nodding and "amening" as though trying to convert people was such a good thing. I knew I could never be a part of a church that promoted and encouraged proselytizing, and I just felt so...sad, because I thought I had really found my "church home."
Again, I don't know if all DOC churches believe in proselytizing or if it was just this one...or if that's something that you would even have a problem with, but I wish someone had told me this before I went.

Just another thought...you might also look into churches that are part of the "emergent church" movement. It's been a few years since I've actually had anything to do with them, but unless something has changed, they tend to be fairly liberal/inclusive/open minded and have a more contemporary style church service as well.

[lolar2]

I think there are something like three different denominations calling themselves "Church of Christ." One teaches Biblical literalism, one is rather liberal, and one is just kind of forceful (they have a lot of Hare Krishna-type recruiters on street corners). This is a gap in my church history knowledge, but I don't know if these are actually different denominations, or different divisions within one denomination such as the Lutherans mentioned above.

[hotmamacita]

Originally Posted by Tjej

If the church is really trying to HIDE the denominational affiliation that is just weird.

And deceptive, and arrogant....etc.

I just heard a sermon by a pastor of one of these 'hidden' denominational churches and I have to say that I feel ill. His tone was dripping with this arrogant, intellectual, "I am better than you" crap and the content of his sermon was unBiblical and narcissistic.

[hotmamacita]

Originally Posted by happydance

I have been to all kinds of Christian churches and nothing seems to fit me. Too conservative, too evangelistic, too old school, too impersonal, too "social" and not spiritual enough...

Sigh. Its so hard to find a good fit and I have been searching for 5 years since I became a christian.

There are times when we are in the wilderness, so to speak. We may wander but are not lost.

[happydance]

Originally Posted by hotmamacita

There are times when we are in the wilderness, so to speak. We may wander but are not lost.

Thank you so much. I have certainly been in the wilderness lately!

And thank you to everyone who answered this thread!!!