grabbing

[tree-hugger]

What should I do when my two-year-old grabs things? She is generally a sweet kid, but she has lately started grabbing things. She grabs things from me and her father and also from other kids. I am a big fan of unconditional parenting and attachment parenting philosophies. However, in the situation I don't know how to respond.

Consider this typical example. At a playgroup (somebody else's house) our two-year-old wants something that another kid is playing with and grabs (or tries to grab) it from them.

Another typical example. I am using something (such as a book that I am reading) and she grabs it from me.

Practical and specific advice would be really helpful. Thank you!

[karika]

I want to respond, but I know others will have more explanations. In the playgroup there are two things that I would suggest, depending on your parenting beliefs. 1- you could let the children work it out for themselves, their personalities will sort it out. 2- you could do peaceful resolution if they are verbal, and you do not agree with children resoluting based on personalities... you have both children hold the object as you discuss the situation and lead them into a resolution, such as "A, you really want to play with this toy, but B has it right now. We are going to to be here for awhile and I bet if you wait a few minutes B will be done playing with it and you can have it then." Or, find a similar toy and bring it to the bargain with you. Tell A they can play with this other toy while B has the original one, and then they can trade. Personally, I am more in favor of letting the children work it out for themselves, but in an environment where most parents are all about "teaching" their children the concept of sharing (which in my philosophy cannot be taught, and should not be taught), a shared resolution may work better.
With the instance of LO grabbing book form your hand, it is most likely an act to draw the attention away form the book, and back to them where they want the attention. Again, it depends on your parenting beliefs what to do. I would just let them take whatever it is they grab (as long as it is not dangerous) and do something else. The child will not continue to do it if they do not get a reaction IMO. If the child is verbal, you can do the thing where you both have your hands on the object and discuss what is happening. "why do you want to take my book? would you like to read it? It is a grown up book and has a lot of words (show the book and the words) do you want me to read it to you?" If yes, read a bit to them, then they get bored and move on... hth