child support curiosity- and sect 8 ?s

[karika]

I have an 18 mo that was a surprise. I had been dating her father for only 3 mo when I became pregnant. We broke up just before finding out I was pregnant, and after finding out decided to keep it that way. He is a troubled individual. He was a recovered heroin addict when I met him, but has since used it and other heavy drugs too. I know because we used to email occasionally. I decided to cut off all contact at that point. He still knows where we are of course, but has not attempted any further contact. I had him come here once when she was 6 mo so he could hold her for a picture for her own curiosities later (before he started using again). I live at dd1's father's home (xdh) in my own room since I had no place else to go in this region. He has been laid off. He has also claimed us all as dependents on taxes. We are now getting FS because of our low income as he is on unemployment and looking for work. He has never been unemployed btw... I applied for a section 8 voucher and will get one as soon as my ppwk is processed. I had told dd2's father I would not pursue cs because I did not want him to have any part in her life, and he had wanted me to abort, so it just didn't feel right. But now I am going to have my own place again soon, and xdh will only be giving me $400/ month for dd1. I am wondering a lot about applying for TANF. I am the type to not want the govt in my business. I am wondering what happens. Like if I apply and say I am not sure who the father is, what happens? If I tell them his name, do they go to him and get a blood sample? Can I tell them I don't want him involved in our life because he is a danger? Will that keep them from contacting him? If I can get $ without them contacting him, what will be said about me wanting to stay home with my children? Is there a time limit? What if I go to school, will that allow me to stay out of the work force for a while? I homeschool dd1 and plan to do the same with dd2. At this point I am thinking of looking for a place that includes everything in the rent so it will be covered with the voucher, right? Then try to make it with FS and the $400 a month. I asked a lot in this post I know, but I want to find a way to have my own place and stay home with my girls if possible. I never thought I would be in this position, I have had a job since I was 13, until I was married and had a child. Now I just want to homeschool them and garden and stay home. Ok I guess this was confusing enough so I stop here. Anyone had any experience with all this?

[Theia]

I'm on a Sec8 voucher and have an unsupported child. Her father is on the birth cert., but I have never given the state permission to attempt to seek CS due to abuse issues. You will have to provide your DC's birth cert, so if he is listed as the father, then they will see that. But if you are afraid that them attempting to collect CS from him for this child would put you or the child in danger, you can have your case marked "as good cause" with the CS division. At least that is the terminology in my state.

I was also on TANF last year. On TANF, different states have different requirements. Some states will only allow you 2 years maximum total of time spent on TANF. Some allow you to stay on TANF with no other obligations as long as you have a child under 5. I do think many states are moving away from that. In my state, once you go onto TANF, they will require you to attend JOB's classes, to get you back out into the workforce. And I was told that I would have to accept the first job I was offered. I didn't have to do the JOB's program while I was on TANF because I was staying in a shelter and was legally homeless. They wanted me to have a home first I guess. Anyway you might want to read up on TANF requirements in your state. For me, I was only getting $448 for 1 adult and 1 child.

The Sec8 voucher is great. I got mine last year when I left shelter. I don't receive any CS, so I am not remembering if they will count that is income towards your rent amount. I believe they do, I just don't know if it can be listed as your sole income. The Sec8 people only wanted our birth certs, SSN cards and my photo ID, and proof of income and bank statements. I don't think they will attempt to delve too deeply into your CS from DC2 father. I would be more concerned about the TANF people though. They will probably at least bring it up. But even if he is listed on your DC birth cert, if you feel he would be a danger to you or your DC you are not required to give them permission to seek CS from him. But neither will the state be likely to support you as a SAHM on TANF because of that situation (speaking from my states requirements anyway).

If you go to school, then you would probably be living off of your CS, FS and financial aid. But then there might be requirements or limitations on your Sec8 voucher. That's another thing I don't remember, because it didn't apply to me at the time.

In my case, I have a small 2bdrm apt with all electric appliances and the only utility I pay is electric. Water, sewage and trash are included. If your income is $400/mo they will do a special Sec8 math that takes into account the cost of utilities in your area for that type of home (apartment, duplex, stand alone houses are rated differently) and come up with a rent amount. Finding a home that is all electric is great. My first months rent was based on my TANF income and was something like $40. I'm pretty sure. My income (non-TANF) came through the month after my voucher was approved. Now my income is much higher (not enough to get me out of Sec8 though), but having the Sec8 voucher makes life so much easier! I know I can afford my rent, my utilities and do so easily. If I were you, I would make the Sec8 voucher your priority because it will make it easier to live the life you want. Even if you do have to seek out a part-time job, your rent will still be affordable. And if you were to lose your job, then your rent amount would go to $0 until you have an income again. This is assuming that you don't have the $400 in CS from DC1 father. Anyway, I hope this is at least of some help. A lot depends on your state with the TANF. Good luck!

(Are you a veteran by any chance? Just today I read that HUD has a huge program for veterans in the PNW providing Sec8 vouchers.)

[karika]

wow thanks, you were informative! I already did the whole deal with the sect 8 approval, now it is just waiting to receive it. I was told it would be 6-8 weeks since I have no criminal record and it has been nearly 4 months. When I called to ask why, I was told there is only one person in charge of going through each submission and it takes a long time.. but I gotta do what I gotta do. dd2 has no father listed on her birth cert. I left it blank. That is neat to hear what your rent was based on that income. I don't have a car or any expenses due to having to file bankruptcy a couple years ago. Thanks for writing! I was afraid my post was too confusing, I have been told I write weird online. I am hoping to get an all expenses included apt (elec and heat) beside the organic food store but not sure how that will be since it is in a bad place for winter driving (dd1's father picking her up for wknds) and there is nothing else within walking distance from there that is fun, but food is my highest priority for sure. I was thinking about school so I could work again one day when the girls are older, xdh would watch them for me as long as it is convenient. Right now, I couldn't hope to be paid much more than $10/hr, and probably more like $9... but with a degree I would hope it would be better. I have many credits from early 90's that may transfer... again thanks for writing, I am very nervous about all this and feeling not very informed.

oh, no I am not a vet

[Theia]

You are welcome. I'm glad my jumble of info was helpful to you. I'm not for sure the amount of my first months rent, it was last winter and a chaotic time to say the least. But I do remember being shocked by how easily I could afford it on my meager income.

Since your DC's father is not on the birth cert, I'd say that you don't know who her father is since that is the assumption made when a father is not listed on the bc. More than likely the Sec8 people won't really care. I hope they come through with your voucher soon by the way! Right now my income is loosely $1000/month and my rent is loosely $220/month for a 2 bedroom all electric apartment.

The thing with your Sec8 voucher is the potential apartment or rental unit will be inspected before they approve your move in and they are strict! It's a good thing because it helps to ensure that just because you are on Sec8 doesn't mean you have to live in a dump. But they will have certain requirements and limitations that some independent landlords are unwilling to fulfill. For example, the blinds on the windows can't have the cords for pulling them up and down tied in a knot at the end because it is a choking hazard.

Do you know of any limited income apartments in your area? They are usually subsidized by the government and already set up to accept HUD requirements. Like Sec8, there can be wait lists to get into them, but they are usually close to shopping or bus lines, and sometimes you get lucky and don't have to wait. I think they are called Sec42 in government speak.

So anyway, I hope this helps you some. I go to SEWA a few times a year to visit family, so I'm vaguely familiar with that part of the country.

[Avani]

You can say you don't know who the father is since he isn't listed on the birth certificate. If you name him they will establish paternity and go for child support. I believe you said he has claimed you both on his taxes. That means you all are in the system so if you claim to not know who the father is and they put it all together it could be considered fraud. Once you go on welfare you can go to school and bypass the working part if you are in a school progrm to gain a certificate of sorts. That is for the state of WA. Four months is nothing for section 8. I hope you get it soon. I've been on a waitlist for 3 years and still have 2 to go. Oh also if you were to want to claim good cause on child support for not going after the dad you have to prove abuse. You would need police reports, restraining order etc. You can't just say you fear him.

[Theia]

I guess it must be different between states then on the "good cause" for CS. I don't have any type of police documentation, the only supporting evidence I have that DHS would be able to see would be my old paperwork from when I was in a relationship with him and claimed the DV grant and stuff.

[karika]

Originally Posted by Avani

You can say you don't know who the father is since he isn't listed on the birth certificate. I believe you said he has claimed you both on his taxes. That means you all are in the system so if you claim to not know who the father is and they put it all together it could be considered fraud.

thank you for responding. dd1's father is the one whose house I am staying at, he is the one claiming us. Not dd2s bio dad. He has never given me anything. Like I said, he wanted me to abort or give her up for adoption. gg

[Avani]

So you're fine, just say you don't know who he is.

[karika]

Originally Posted by Avani

Four months is nothing for section 8. I hope you get it soon. I've been on a waitlist for 3 years and still have 2 to go.

This is part of my confusion. What do you mean a wait list? Here they did a lottery. Every one applied, then they drew 2500 applications in a lottery. I had an early number, so I have already done the intake part where they look at your ss cards and other papers. I was told the next part is going to get the actual voucher. Are you talking about a wait list for a specific apartment? I was looking online at the properties listed on their site. They look nice, but I couldn't see a floor plan on any of them. I have heard that a lot of places take sect 8, that you don't necessarily have to live in one of those properties. I would like to find a little cabin in the woods with an area for gardening if possible....

back to the school thing. I have 70 credits towards a 4 year degree. I am really into math and science. I would like to finish that somehow. I feel my children will be old enough so that I could have a career in a few years. Good to know one can go to school instead of work at a dead end job. I still have the same problem I had the first time around though, I cannot decide what to study. I am going to make another post about that. Thank you again.

[Theia]

You don't have to rent a place that is listed with Sec8, but if a landlord isn't registered with Sec8, they might not accept it. You can find private landlords who will take a Sec8 voucher, but just know that some won't. Some have never accepted them, and others have tried only to be screwed over by less than desirable applicants. I don't know which is more common. But if you have a way of showing a good rental history, then I wouldn't limit yourself beyond your income and those that might accept a voucher.

As far as school, do what you gotta do on that. I haven't seen your other post, so I'm not much help there. I just wanted to let you know what I thought might be helpful given my experiences. Some how you will have to make a decision as to what to study. At least math and sciences are related. Its not the same as if you wished to study drama and science. Are you interested in teaching? That seems to always be in demand, especially in the fields you mentioned and as a woman. Not that you should have to play the gender card, but it is my understanding that there are not enough women teachers in those subjects.