HELP! newborn won't sleep.

[prone_to_wander]

My son is 7 days old and I'm falling apart. He has been feeding since 3 am and it is after 5 now. He'll drift asleep momentarily and then is back up 10 minutes later. He is refusing some latches. He won't side lay feed. I'm at my wits end. Any suggestions. He won't sleep with out feeding to sleep.

cross posted in night time parenting

[candelaria80]

I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time. Do you have a wrap carrier? DD lived in the moby her first days.

[Juvysen]

is he swaddled? I really like the approach in "happiest baby on the block" His whole thing is geared toward the newborn phase.

[basje]

It might be that he needs to suck to stay asleep but isn't really hungry. I usually am against them but you might try (an be careful to only use from 2-6am to be sure he is getting enough bm) a paci. I do know on mother who it saved their nursing relationship. She used it for about four weeks while he was a newborn then tossed it out.

If you do decide to do this, I guess the main thing would be to use it sparingly because all that sucking does add up to a significant amount of food. It is important though that YOU don't loose your mind. Good luck!

[lifeguard]

Is he sleeping a lot during the day. Ds was backwards for quite awhile when he was a newborn - I just slept as much as I could during the day with him & kept it quiet & darkish during the night while he was awake. He did eventually switch & it was very sudden - not gradual at all.

[jennybear]

I'd try a pacifier if he'll take it.

Are you bed sharing? That helped DD sleep in the beginning.

I felt like things got better once I got over the whole "expecting to sleep at night" thing. I know that sounds awful, but I learned that newborns really don't differentiate between night and day. So, I just slept when she did and got enough rest. Once she hit a month or so things really settled down and she was sleeping decent chunks at night and taking less time to eat. Now, she's 5.5 months, a beautiful sleeper (7pm-7am!) and the first few weeks seem like a blur. It sucks now, but I promise it will be over soon.

[karika]

make sure your intake is free of caffeine, HFCS, and food colorings as these all have the effect of keeping baby awake. I don't normally drink any kind of soda, but had one with caffeine in it when dd1 was a couple months old. She stayed awake for 14 hrs. Then slept for 7.... it really affected her. I agree with the sleep any time you can approach, I got 2 hr naps for the first few months. sleep 2 hours, awake 2 hours, sleep 2 hours.... like that. All that matters is nursing, sleeping, eating and drinking(for you I mean), and the toilet.... for at least the first month. I stayed in the bedroom with dd2 for the first 3 months almost exclusively. I came out to the lr a few times in month 3, but other than that, it was just me and her, naked in the bedroom and nursing and sleeping. I kept her on my chest, neither of us wearing clothes. No pillow and only a thin sheet pulled to my waist. No one else in the bed. That will get you through the first part, which is really about survival and caring for baby....

[prone_to_wander]

I finally managed to get him down after I put him in the ring sling and then he fell alseep on the breast.

I try to not have to many expectations about when he should be sleeping...but it was just the hours of crying/feeding and refusing to latch on while laying down. It was doing my head in. He was crying....I was crying...baaaddd night.

I swaddle him sometimes, but he really doesn't like it. He much prefers to have his hands up near his head.

I'd prefer to avoid a pacifier but perhaps it is something I should look into. He does suck at his hands an awful lot.

I slept with him each time today so hopefully I can pull it together if he does it again tonight. Thanks everyone.

[Knitting Mama]

As far as the swaddle goes, at first, my Cecilia seemed to dislike being swaddled. But once she was wrapped up, she'd calm down really quickly. It did wonders for the amount of time she'd sleep, because her hands were so hyperactive that she'd wake herself up constantly if they were free. I'd really try swaddling again to see if you can prolong his sleep.

[Juvysen]

Originally Posted by Cecilia's Mama

As far as the swaddle goes, at first, my Cecilia seemed to dislike being swaddled. But once she was wrapped up, she'd calm down really quickly. It did wonders for the amount of time she'd sleep, because her hands were so hyperactive that she'd wake herself up constantly if they were free. I'd really try swaddling again to see if you can prolong his sleep.

Most babies don't like the first minute or so of being swaddled. The happiest baby on the block (which you can get the video instead of trying to find time to read) talks about that. My kids didn't like getting swaddled, but then once I turned them on their side and nursed for a couple minutes, they were just happily swaddled and usually slept much longer stretches than when not swaddled...

[mrsgrasty]

I actually just posted something similar last night b/c I was experiencing pretty much the same thing. I broke down today and bought a pacifier. I am just waiting now to see if he gets to that needs-to-suck-to-sleep-but-tummy-is-full stage around 3am. isn't it awful? my boy just cries and cries and he gets so agitated at the breast.

i don't intend on using the pacifier often or for long. just in emergencies for these first few weeks. grandparents and auntie are around a lot, so i am hoping they "get" this too, that it is not just to pacify the baby so they can hold him longer before they pass him to me to nurse.

anyway, just wanted to commiserate. glad to hear i'm not the only one dealing with this issue. hope we can both find a solutions soon.