I think a month of little sleep has caught up with me. Last night it was 4am by the time Zoey calmed down enough to sleep. DH was just out and little help. I can't co-sleep with her, too much fear that my lack of sleep will have me roll on her. DH was just not awake enough to remember if he was going to co-sleep the blanker needed to be low, pillows high and either he needed to have a shirt on or the fan off. He was bundled and not helpful. So I put Zoey in her bouncy as she tends to like the vibration. So I got to sleep and so did she and then she coughed, only I thought she was choking and sat right up and screamed to DH. He was so grumpy over me freaking out. I sobbed myself back to sleep.
We have a co-sleeper but baby hates it for some reason. She wants an incline I think or something softer. Who can blame her. I was up so much the rest of the morning thinking someone was breaking into the house, thinking the Dog needed to go out (He was too sleepy for me even to kick him out of the house so I was clearly wrong.) I nursed Zoey when she needed and just loved on her and cried over worry for her.
She didn't gain in a week. (Friday-Thursday) My other babies failed to thrive and nursing them was so hard and trying near everything I could and it was traumatic. It seems to be hitting me.
I have been in bed most of today trying hard not to cry, trying to rest. I can't seem to sleep. Zoey seems to have gained the last three days enough to near make up for that week but I am still scared, specially as she has not had the blowouts we are used to from her but less output in the dirty diaper. I think things are out but at the same time, that full on fear gets me in it's grips.
I hope tonight is ok!
Looks like I might need to go back to placenta smoothies.
One bad night, one listless day.
I hope I can feel like myself again. DH has been great today. Nights are hardest on him, they has been effecting him since day one. I was doing ok till last night.
We have a co-sleeper but baby hates it for some reason. She wants an incline I think or something softer. Who can blame her. I was up so much the rest of the morning thinking someone was breaking into the house, thinking the Dog needed to go out (He was too sleepy for me even to kick him out of the house so I was clearly wrong.) I nursed Zoey when she needed and just loved on her and cried over worry for her.
She didn't gain in a week. (Friday-Thursday) My other babies failed to thrive and nursing them was so hard and trying near everything I could and it was traumatic. It seems to be hitting me.
I have been in bed most of today trying hard not to cry, trying to rest. I can't seem to sleep. Zoey seems to have gained the last three days enough to near make up for that week but I am still scared, specially as she has not had the blowouts we are used to from her but less output in the dirty diaper. I think things are out but at the same time, that full on fear gets me in it's grips.
I hope tonight is ok!
Looks like I might need to go back to placenta smoothies.
One bad night, one listless day.
I hope I can feel like myself again. DH has been great today. Nights are hardest on him, they has been effecting him since day one. I was doing ok till last night.
momma
I had one for my last baby but she did not like it. I think Zoey might like that better than the co-sleeper! 
I sure hope so.
