Originally Posted by nikirj
it seems like much less of a chore when I've had the whole day to myself (um, with just the baby - wow when I was a first-time parent I would NOT have thought that would seem restful).
I had to comment on the last with a big LOL. H and I are so excited because my mom is taking the three older kids to an amusement park on Saturday:P Who would ever have guessed that a day with just a babe would be a day off?
Okay back on topic: My opinion has always been that three is a rough age. With my kids it was from about 3.5 to 4.5 but I think it came early with my middle one and there was no new baby to adjust to. But we had lots of talking back, tantrums, yelling, etc. It was pretty hellish and I always joke that if we hit that age there won't be new babies for awhile.
But that said, my former youngest has been having a hard time adjusting and she's five. We've had many, many meltdowns over imagined slights and over not being able to do things. Mostly I just let her sob and when she's ready we snuggle together. Because she's older she's also interested in baby care so I recruit for small tasks.
I second Ann's idea of keeping a list handy of things you can do with the older child when holding younger child. Sometimes when Piper is about to lose it, I can head it off by reading to her or talking to her about her drawings.