The "Whatever" Thread - Page 8

[lilcrunchymama]

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes

I think I'm going to just throw myself into cleaning the house so that I feel like I'm working toward something and not just treading water! So annoyed!

Somebody send me some effin' zen!

Turn on some music while you clean. That always brightens my mood, or at least makes cleaning a little more bearable.

LCM - CP is cervical position. You can also check this and chart it to confirm where you are in your cycle.

I think I might stick with trying to temp. That sounds like a bit of a challenge! I know how to diagnose my CF, but I have NEVER felt my cervix before. I mean, when I was pregnant the doctor had a hard enough time reaching it...so I can see me now...

[echospiritwarrior]

whoa, you guys are active! This stalking is taking so long I can hardly keep up

Originally Posted by pinkgeek

This is one of the big bones of contention b/t me and DH, and one of his hangups on having any LOs. I can tolerate a good bit of clutter and chaos, but he really can't. We live in a smallish 2 BR condo and I have a lot of stuff. I've pretty much taken over the DR with my home business (I have a FT day job too) and the house is really just in need of de-cluttering. I really need to get on top of it so that I can get the go-ahead from DH...

I can be SOOOO liberating to get rid of clutter though!! I had some serious bouts this year after joining one of the threads over in decluttering and organizing sub forum here. I felt like I lost a monkey on my shoulder the day a lady from freecycle came by and picked up over 100 books! I am by nature a clutter bug but after having worked at getting things sparse I am always looking for opportunities to reduce and clear because the end result is so wonderful!

Originally Posted by MarineWife

echo ~ Yeah, I got a bit confused when you were asking when your O day was and then saying you had graduated and people congratulating you. I'm a bit slow but I do catch on eventually. I looked at your chart yesterday and was wondering if it's possible you Oed earlier, when you thought you did. Since temping is only accurate to within 3 days of O, it's certainly possible.

I didn't know that it was only accurate w/in three days of O, interesting. I still think I Oed earlier since I got such a super dark line when Ovusoft said I was only 7dpo I am guessing that O may have been a couple of days earlier... it'll be interesting to see what my m/w says when I show her my chart during my first prenatal next month. Between the info I have on the chart and her palpatating I think we'll come up with a fairly accurate edd.

Originally Posted by lilcrunchymama

Well, I'm still having boob discomfort today. I can't even sleep on my stomach it hurts so bad. The cramps have gone away, though. I still have until the weekend before I will even think about testing. Yesterday when I picked up DD after work she stuck her hand down my shirt. DP laughed, but it just made me wonder. You think children can have a sixth sense when it comes to things changing with your body? She even told me she needed to sleep with me last night. My child NEVER acts like this!

I think children really do know things. DD commented on how much my tummy was growing a couple of days before I poas! Strange thing about the sore boobs that is usually my main early symptom, that and exhaustion (I've been really blessed to never have m/s) but nada in the breasts yet... kinda making me a little paranoid.

Originally Posted by akind1

I thought about acupuncture when TTC, but couldn't justify the expense. It is like $100 a session here, and not covered by insurance.

we're really lucky to have this income contingent based place here, they don't even ask for proof you can just tell them you make under 30K and it's like $20 a visit! Maybe you can look for something like that.

[lyterae]

Originally Posted by kcroto42

Holy Temp Rise, Batman!

Now, let's see if I'm understanding this right. Assuming that I get the rest of the thermal shift to confirm O (nothing changed tonight to make me think this temp is inaccurate), then that means that I O'd within the last three days. I guess when based on my CF, which helps determine my peak day? Which would probably be CD14, as I had no fertile CF yesterday? Which would mean our whatevering timing was decent, and I'd have reason to actually pay attention during my LP?

Woo! That is quite the temp rise. Two more high temps and you can confirm O. That would be good "whatevering" as you are within the ovulation -5 range.

I don't quite understand the peak day, as I'm pretty sure you would also need to be checking your cervix position to determine that.

Originally Posted by lilcrunchymama

What is CP? Sorry, not up to date with acronyms. I haven't been a part of a mass message board in a long time.

Cervical Position, I think someone else may have already answered.

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes

AFM: I wish FF had a check box for bummed b/c that's totally how I feel today.

Boo.

I think I'm going to just throw myself into cleaning the house so that I feel like I'm working toward something and not just treading water! So annoyed!

Somebody send me some effin' zen!

I hope your day gets better.

Originally Posted by lilcrunchymama

I think I might stick with trying to temp. That sounds like a bit of a challenge! I know how to diagnose my CF, but I have NEVER felt my cervix before. I mean, when I was pregnant the doctor had a hard enough time reaching it...so I can see me now...

I think temping is the easiest way to keep track of when you ovulated, I still haven't figured out all of the nuances associated with my cervix.

Originally Posted by echospiritwarrior

whoa, you guys are active! This stalking is taking so long I can hardly keep up

AFM: 14DPO, and my temp went up this morning (not much, but it did!).


I also got 5 free VIP days yesterday evening, I love VIP days.

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by lyterae

AFM: 14DPO, and my temp went up this morning (not much, but it did!).


I also got 5 free VIP days yesterday evening, I love VIP days.

Still up there though! Crossing my crossables for you!

UPDATE: I feel a little odd. So, DH was in the shower, and I sort of got in the shower w/him and w/o going into too much TMI...he said he was comfortable even though I'm pretty sure I'm going to O in the next few days or so! But now I'm thinking what if I get a super high temp the next few days and it puts my O at CD12? So I told him I was a little worried and he's all, don't worry - if you get PG its ok, we're being careful just not too careful. Ugh so can someone tell me why all of a sudden I feel sick? Nerves you think b/c I kinda pushed the whatevering into possible TTC category?

Honestly I think it's b/c I don't think he realizes just how potentialy fertile I am right now and I do. I want to just clear that air b/w us w/o scaring him shitless.

Oh - I don't check CP either! I only do temp and cm.

[akind1]

I've never been able to figure out CP; late in pregnancy, I could actually feel my cervix, so I knew it was low then. (short fingers trying to reach around huge belly). I am just never sure if I have reached it or not otherwise.

when TTC I did CM and temps. since having DS, just CM, but will go back to temping, whenever I have another cycle.

Lyterae, here's hoping!!!

Carrie, nervousness is completely normal! I normally get queasy between 10DPO and AF just at the possibility! LOL

I am now just twiddling my thumbs waiting for something to happen. anything, really.

[lyterae]

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes

UPDATE: I feel a little odd. So, DH was in the shower, and I sort of got in the shower w/him and w/o going into too much TMI...he said he was comfortable even though I'm pretty sure I'm going to O in the next few days or so! But now I'm thinking what if I get a super high temp the next few days and it puts my O at CD12? So I told him I was a little worried and he's all, don't worry - if you get PG its ok, we're being careful just not too careful. Ugh so can someone tell me why all of a sudden I feel sick? Nerves you think b/c I kinda pushed the whatevering into possible TTC category?

Honestly I think it's b/c I don't think he realizes just how potentialy fertile I am right now and I do. I want to just clear that air b/w us w/o scaring him shitless.

I think you have been honest and I think that "whatevering" means going with the flow of things versus pushing for sex during ovulation time.

If you have been honest, then go with it. It is nerve wracking I agree though

[MarineWife]

kc ~ Your peak would be cd14. I think TAoNFP says O most often happens the day of and either the day before or the day after peak day. Now I can't remember if it's before or after. You could get pg with that timing since it's within 5 days of O.

I know this seems to be an area of confusion. It is for me, anyway. I can never keep straight if the fertile window is O-5 or O-6 or O-7. I read an article yesterday called The 5 Myths about Women's Bodies or something like that. One of the myths they listed was that a woman could not get pg from dtd during . I had to laugh at that because it wasn't really clear and I bet a bunch of women who read that are now going to freak out over it. Anyway, one thing it said was that sperm can live for 7 days inside a woman. So, is that O-7 or O-6? I think it would be O-6, right, because that's O day plus the 6 days before?

Baby ~ That doesn't sound like TTC to me. I think there's a fine line between TTC and whatevering when you chart, I think. Some people would say that any time anyone dtd without protection they are TTC since there's the potential of getting pg. I agree with lyterae that it's not TTC if you didn't push for sex just because you are potentially fertile right now. And, remember, even perfect timing doesn't guarantee a pg.

lyterae ~ I can't believe you're going to make use wait 2 more days just to confirm what we already know.

[akind1]

I was wrong. CD 35 today.

honesty is always best, and for me, whatevering means being OK with whatever (pregnant or not, sex during O time or not) although I can be dissapointed in lack of sex, regardless, I think! DH actually followed me to bed last night, but rather than seem like he wanted any, he just laid there. at least I got to cuddle a little, which I don't usually, because I am asleep when he comes to bed, and I am always up and out of bed before he is. oh well.

Oh, and I love VIP days! LOL I need to find my FF log in info again . . .or go back to iVillage. FF is easier to share though.

[kcroto42]

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes

BTW - I think that tattoo idea is beautiful!

Thanks. I still have some very upset feelings about the way Lucy was born; I've mostly stopped kicking myself around for it, but it's still problematic for me. I feel like this tattoo would be very healing. I think that when I get it done, I want some things "carved" into the trunk of the tree to represent Robb & I, and some things in the branches for my kids -- a little turtle for her, and something for the new baby, whenever we have it. and the roots buried deep in the scar tissue. A friend of mine has agreed to do the piece for me; just need to be done having kids now...

Originally Posted by lyterae

I don't quite understand the peak day, as I'm pretty sure you would also need to be checking your cervix position to determine that.
<snip>
I also got 5 free VIP days yesterday evening, I love VIP days.

I never check my CP; it always feels the same to me.

I sent my sister a FF link in hopes that she would sign up and I would get some VIP days, but no luck so far. I was pretty darn blatant, but she's all "busy" planning a "wedding" and trying to get "knocked up" or something.

Dammit.

If we end up due at the same time, the entire rest of my family will be traumatized for months. It'll be AWESOME.

[lilcrunchymama]

Originally Posted by echospiritwarrior

I think children really do know things. DD commented on how much my tummy was growing a couple of days before I poas! Strange thing about the sore boobs that is usually my main early symptom, that and exhaustion (I've been really blessed to never have m/s) but nada in the breasts yet... kinda making me a little paranoid.

I haven't been pregnant in 3 years, so I have been trying to really think back to what my early symptoms were with DD. I only TTC for 4 months before getting a BFP. I charted the first 3 months and then the 4th month I stopped because I felt like I was thinking about it too much. So, I wasn't sure when I O'ed and, honestly, I don't even remember having sex with DH anytime around the time I would have O'ed. So, I wasn't aware of when my AF was really late, but I kept having minor AF-like cramps and I remember my boobs being sore. But, back then I didn't have a kid to rub on them or hit them and remind me exactly how sore they were. So, it is definitely a possible pregnancy symptom for me. Not every pregnancy has the same symptoms, tho. Which could be good and bad, depending on what you gain or lose.

Originally Posted by lyterae

I think temping is the easiest way to keep track of when you ovulated, I still haven't figured out all of the nuances associated with my cervix.

AFM: 14DPO, and my temp went up this morning (not much, but it did!).

I don't think I want to know everything about my cervix. I can tell when it is positioned high or low sometimes because DP will "hit" it when DTD. That ain"t comfy! I hope your temp stays up! I am so lost in the world of charting. GAAH!

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes

UPDATE: I feel a little odd. So, DH was in the shower, and I sort of got in the shower w/him and w/o going into too much TMI...he said he was comfortable even though I'm pretty sure I'm going to O in the next few days or so! But now I'm thinking what if I get a super high temp the next few days and it puts my O at CD12? So I told him I was a little worried and he's all, don't worry - if you get PG its ok, we're being careful just not too careful. Ugh so can someone tell me why all of a sudden I feel sick? Nerves you think b/c I kinda pushed the whatevering into possible TTC category?

Honestly I think it's b/c I don't think he realizes just how potentialy fertile I am right now and I do. I want to just clear that air b/w us w/o scaring him shitless.

Oh - I don't check CP either! I only do temp and cm.

You can still have the "whatever" attitude. I have a feeling I'm going to feel the same way whenever DP tells me we can try for real. Maybe just because you are used to avoiding and so the real possibility of actually trying has never had a chance to set in. And you were completely honest with him, so you can't be nervous for "cheating" him out of information. Just go with the flow.

Originally Posted by MarineWife

I know this seems to be an area of confusion. It is for me, anyway. I can never keep straight if the fertile window is O-5 or O-6 or O-7. I read an article yesterday called The 5 Myths about Women's Bodies or something like that. One of the myths they listed was that a woman could not get pg from dtd during . I had to laugh at that because it wasn't really clear and I bet a bunch of women who read that are now going to freak out over it. Anyway, one thing it said was that sperm can live for 7 days inside a woman. So, is that O-7 or O-6? I think it would be O-6, right, because that's O day plus the 6 days before?

SPERM CAN LIVE FOR 6 DAYS!?!?! I am really out of the loop with this... So, that means the days we do go without w/d and without condoms can still turn into viable pregnancies. Ok, I have to admit, knowing my *new* odds, that is a little scary. My boobs are really showing me signs of possibilities now. How crazy! Learn something new everyday...

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by lilcrunchymama

SPERM CAN LIVE FOR 6 DAYS!?!?! I am really out of the loop with this... So, that means the days we do go without w/d and without condoms can still turn into viable pregnancies.

Yeah, everything I've read in the past says 6 days but this article I read yesterday said 7 days. That's why NFP/FAM isn't 100% effective. Even with a relatively hostile vaginal environment, some sperm could survive long enough for O. Biologically speaking, reproducing is the 2nd most important purpose of life so it makes sense that our bodies would work very hard at making that happen no matter what.

Whether or not the times you dtd can result in a pg depends on how close it is to when you O. If the last day you dtd unprotected is cd6 and you don't usually O before cd14, the chance of getting pg is very slim. Do you O regularly and know when that is?

If you are tracking CF then you know when you start to become potentially fertile. Whenever you have CF wetter than your BIP, you are potentially fertile. It doesn't have to be the most fertile CF. If your BIP is dry, as soon as you get sticky CF, you are considered potentially fertile.

If you don't track CF, you can figure out the earliest you could become potentially fertile by subtracting 16 from your shortest cycle length. For example, if your shortest cycle was 28 days long, you subtract 16 from 28 to figure out the earliest you would probably O, which would be cd12. Then, if you are avoiding, don't dtd unprotected after cd5 and you should be safe.

On CP, you don't need to track that to determine potential fertility or confirm O. It's a secondary fertility sign that you can use to support your temp and CF interpretations. It took me several cycles of checking every day to learn my CP. I check it sometimes because I usually get at least a week of EWCF but only 2-3 days of a very fertile CP so it can help me know when I'm closer to O.

[kcroto42]

Originally Posted by lilcrunchymama

SPERM CAN LIVE FOR 6 DAYS!?!?! I am really out of the loop with this... So, that means the days we do go without w/d and without condoms can still turn into viable pregnancies. Ok, I have to admit, knowing my *new* odds, that is a little scary. My boobs are really showing me signs of possibilities now. How crazy! Learn something new everyday...

I know, right? This is why we used w/d from the end of AF to O confirmation. I've had some fairly early Os, and didn't want to risk it.

[lilcrunchymama]

Originally Posted by MarineWife

Yeah, everything I've read in the past says 6 days but this article I read yesterday said 7 days. That's why NFP/FAM isn't 100% effective. Even with a relatively hostile vaginal environment, some sperm could survive long enough for O. Biologically speaking, reproducing is the 2nd most important purpose of life so it makes sense that our bodies would work very hard at making that happen no matter what.

Whether or not the times you dtd can result in a pg depends on how close it is to when you O. If the last day you dtd unprotected is cd6 and you don't usually O before cd14, the chance of getting pg is very slim. Do you O regularly and know when that is?

If you are tracking CF then you know when you start to become potentially fertile. Whenever you have CF wetter than your BIP, you are potentially fertile. It doesn't have to be the most fertile CF. If your BIP is dry, as soon as you get sticky CF, you are considered potentially fertile.

If you don't track CF, you can figure out the earliest you could become potentially fertile by subtracting 16 from your shortest cycle length. For example, if your shortest cycle was 28 days long, you subtract 16 from 28 to figure out the earliest you would probably O, which would be cd12. Then, if you are avoiding, don't dtd unprotected after cd5 and you should be safe.

On CP, you don't need to track that to determine potential fertility or confirm O. It's a secondary fertility sign that you can use to support your temp and CF interpretations. It took me several cycles of checking every day to learn my CP. I check it sometimes because I usually get at least a week of EWCF but only 2-3 days of a very fertile CP so it can help me know when I'm closer to O.

Years ago when I charted I read somewhere that sperm only have a lifespan of 3 days, so that is why I am so shocked to read this. I promise I'm not just an idiot. I am learning a lot of stuff from you all!

Even though I don't chart, I'm going to try and pick apart my cycle and maybe someone can help me out. (BTW: if I do get AF, I'm going to start temping and charting for next cycle) normally my cycles are anywhere from 28-30 days. I was diagnosed with PCOS, but here recently I have had pretty consistent cycles since I have lost weight. My last cycle was 30 days long. I am currently on day 26. I get EWCM anywhere from CD 12 to CD 16. It is always around the 2nd week after the start of AF. We usually DTD without protection anywhere from CD 5 up to CD 10. The case for this cycle would have been around CD 8 or 9 that we didn't use anything. And right now I have very minimal CM, and it is sticky, paste-like.

So, not sure what to think. I follow my CM and take note of when it is EWCM and when it's not, but I don't write down anything so I don't have definite CD's to go on.

[lilcrunchymama]

Originally Posted by kcroto42

I know, right? This is why we used w/d from the end of AF to O confirmation. I've had some fairly early Os, and didn't want to risk it.

We always DTD without anything at the beginning of my cycle and then use protection during the end half. We are essentially doing it backwards. So, I think I want to keep it that way...if you get my drift!

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by lilcrunchymama

We always DTD without anything at the beginning of my cycle and then use protection during the end half. We are essentially doing it backwards. So, I think I want to keep it that way...if you get my drift!

Yeah, that's backward if you are TTA. This thread isn't for TTA, though, so we can do it however we want.

Without knowing the specifics for this cycle there's no way to know what may be going on. If you knew your peak day, I could make an educated guess of when you most likely Oed (assuming you actually did) and your chances of pg.

[lilcrunchymama]

Originally Posted by MarineWife

Yeah, that's backward if you are TTA. This thread isn't for TTA, though, so we can do it however we want.

Without knowing the specifics for this cycle there's no way to know what may be going on. If you knew your peak day, I could make an educated guess of when you most likely Oed (assuming you actually did) and your chances of pg.

Hey, I'm not TTA...the guy with the sperm is!

I'm just waiting it out. I'm going to test this weekend if doesn't show her face.

[StephandOwen]

Peeking in here... a little scared We definitely aren't TTC (and don't plan to for another 2-3 years) but we were also a little careless this month (we use bc pills and condoms.... pills weren't taken at the same time every day because we were on vacation, at least one day it was forgotten and taken the next day... condoms weren't used as well as we have in the past). Last pill was Saturday, Sunday started the blank week of pills. Usually I get AF on Tuesday night or Wednesday morning. It's wednesday at noon and.... nothing. No cramps. No spotting (I usually start spotting by Tuesday night and sometime Wednesday morning before noon it starts flowing.... I know this because up until last week I worked Wednesdays but don't get a break until noon but I always started after I got to work (at 8am) and before my break at noon). I also posted a thread in the multiples section about crazy dreams I've been having so that's freaked me out too.

This next part it WAY TMI... sorry.... usually if I dtd with dp or use a toy () Tuesday night or Wednesday morning when AF should arrive I get spotting immediately. I freaked out about an hour ago and played but nothing... nada... not a drop. WTH??

This would be pretty bad if I am pregnant. We really really wanted me to get through school before we have a baby (I still have 3 years left). I could probably finish really quickly and get my associates before a baby was born, if I were pregnant now, but I really wanted to get more than that done before a baby. ARGH! Not to mention dp and I aren't married and aren't planning a wedding for another 2 years BUT we don't want a baby before we get married. If we get married it messes with ds's insurance. We would survive, but it would be stressful.

[onetwoten]

LOL lcm!! I suppose the same could be said here. *I'm* not the one avoiding!

Wowzers-- I'm glad this thread took off but holy crap guys. I'm gone for a few hours and there's two pages to catch up on.

lyterae: I am way more excited than I should be for your increasing temps. lol. And FINALLY someone gets the VIP free days at a nice time, not like CD4, which is when they always give them to me. I admire your strength for holding out on testing, it must be super exciting watching the temps still go up. How are you feeling symptom wise either way?

Kristine-- I love the tattoo idea, it sounds absolutely wonderful.

I tried checking CP for a few cycles, and I never really felt confident about what i was feeling, and since my cycles are so regular, I figured I have more of a chance of confusing myself by adding in wrong data, than I do of helping myself figure out where I am in the cycle.

Babycakes-- I don't remember, but will your DH look at your chart? That's been the best thing for my DH, and it takes a lot of pressure off of me, because I can say "hey-- you looked at it, I explained it to you, if you wanted to take chances ,that's not on my anymore". He's actually gotten more lax about avoiding since he started paying attention to my chart, and I think in some backwards way, it's because he feels like I'm being more honest and open with him, and since he doesn't worry about being 'deceived', he feels more willing, and loving, etc etc, you know? Like if we get pregnant and it's his idea, that's one thing, but if we got pregnant and it's because I didn't tell him we were fertile, then that's a whole nother ball game.

But that said-- I think if you told him that there was a good chance you would o soon, and he said ok, then you're still well within the 'ok' range. You let him know, and then you carry on with whatever your intention was in the first place, either dtd or not. If your intention is just to have fun with your DH, then I don't think you shuold feel guilty about 'pushing' ttc on him. I do think some of the stress right now though is probably that it's one thing when it's an accident, but when you knowingly go into a possible situation, it's a bit of a shock, especially when you've been avoiding for so long.

I think that's all I can remember guys!

[lyterae]

Originally Posted by jeninejessica

Wowzers-- I'm glad this thread took off but holy crap guys. I'm gone for a few hours and there's two pages to catch up on.

lyterae: I am way more excited than I should be for your increasing temps. lol. And FINALLY someone gets the VIP free days at a nice time, not like CD4, which is when they always give them to me. I admire your strength for holding out on testing, it must be super exciting watching the temps still go up. How are you feeling symptom wise either way?

I think the thread has been a success as well.

I can't wait until Friday when I can finally get a test, DH basically is considering me "not pregnant" until he can see two pink lines
I'm starting to think, hey, 4 weeks today

I feel yucky, heartburn, nauesa, bloated, etc.. I don't feel like AF is coming, I do keep getting sudden "wet" sensations though, the CM is definitely plentiful.

[lilcrunchymama]

I'm excited for you, too, Lyterae! Looks like we may be testing at the same time this week.