How do you respond when asked why? - Page 4

[purplestraws]

The few times that somebody has asked if we were going to circ or made reference to us needing to do it I've said, "Why would we?" I'm all about discussing it with people and making sure they have the FACTS about circumcision. Asking that question makes it possible to open up a conversation and to understand where they're coming from...and to help them see where you're coming from. Chances are, they've never even thought about NOT circing.

I think that when somebody challenges our position on leaving our sons intact it's our responsibility to be open to discussing it at length. If we really want to make a difference we have to use those opportunities to share the truth...even if it doesn't happen right away, maybe you'll plant a seed.

[blizzard_babe]

No one has ever asked! My sister's bf made a comment to DH one time (he's passionately pro-circ because of the "locker room" hooey), but no one has ever said a single word, pro or con, to me.

The response I have in my brain is, "Couldn't come up with a reason to have it done."

[elanorh]

Since mine are girls, I don't often get asked this question. But, when circumcision comes up in conversation, my typical response is:

1. We didn't really know whether we wanted to or not, but our Pediatrician told us that she won't do them unless the parents have a religious reason, and that the AAP doesn't recommend circumcision.

2. I did a little research, and found she was right. No medical organization recommends circumcision. I figure, if we're born with them, we must need them! Why put a baby through a circumcision when it's not medically necessary?

3. (Since I live in a rural area) - Also, we don't circumcise our animals - so if circumcision is so important from a hygiene perspective, why don't vets circumcise all the breeding bulls/stallions etc. here? After all, we humans have access to soap, clean water, it's easy for us to clean with our hands, unlike the animals we aren't circumcising..... *This comment usually really makes people stop and think - for whatever reason, the 'cleanliness' argument seems to be the big one I hear around here.*

I've had this discussion with my older sister (who was passionate about circ from a 'cleanliness' perspective). She wasn't defensive at all - she said, "Well, I might have made a different decision if this information had been out there when G was born!" I think that the "My doctor says...." followed by "no medical organization recommends it" approach is a good way to defuse the defensiveness, at least if the kiddos are a bit older. In this way, mom (because it's usually a mom asking this) doesn't feel so defensive, AND has the "up to date" information in case circumcision comes up in a conversation she has with someone else (of course, the AAP hasn't recommended routine circumcision for a long time but they don't have to know that).... I often compare it to breastfeeding/formula-feeding; that doctors gave the wrong advice on that for a long time, too, and even now that they 'know better,' they still don't always give the best advice/support, just as some doctors continue to push circumcision even though their medical organizations don't recommend it.

[angela1435]

Thanks for all the responses! I have had 2 people ask so far. I said no and that was that. There is still one person that I have been avoiding talking with about it to be honest. But I think I am developing thicker skin.

[ancoda]

I have just answered people that after researching it we did not feel that we had the right to make that decision for our sons. Also our insurance with our first son did not cover it. So that added to my feelings that it is purely cosmetic.