Can I just say?

[shanniesue2]

two is nowhere near as enjoyable as 0-18 months.... if I didn't have a degree in childhood development, I would swear that my wonderful son has developed bipolar disorder or something (and when I say that, I mean no offense to people who suffer from or who have children who suffer from bipolar disorder). One minute he is this perfectly happy, cheerful, charming, polite, funny little kid... and the next minute... you'd think armaggedon was here.

Today, he had this HUGE tantrum b/c I wouldn't let him eat just a popsicle (it's really a fruit bar) for lunch. That was all he wanted. I offered him choices an that just ticked him off even more. So I began just fixing several appropriate options... my plan was to set them on the table, figuring that when he actually saw the food, he would be better equipped to make a choice and then I could eat whatever he didn't want (I was reheating leftovers and making a sandwich, so this wasn't particularly inconvenient for me). He screamed at me the whole time he saw me prepping food, "PUT IT BACK MOMMY! PUT IT BACK MOMMY PUT IT BACK MOMMY!" The screaming went on the entire time I was getting food ready. He even tried grabbing my legs and pushing me around to direct me to putting the food back into the fridge. I finally made it through food prep and put the options on the table... you know what he did? He happily settled down and opted for the sandwich and orange slices. I let him have a popsicle when he was finished. He got done, said "thank you mommy" asked me for a wipey (Wash cloth) to wipe his hands and face and climbed out of his seat. He even drank his milk gratefully (getting him to drink anything but juice lately has been a major pill).

And we go through phases like this all. day. long. About anything and everything. It's just been the last several weeks that he has gotten like this (and yes there have been many changes in routine... which I know explains A LOT, but I'm sure that some of it is normal two year old stuff)... anyway, I just needed to vent.

Thanks for listening. I feel a little better now.... maybe tomorrow will be a better day.

[OTMomma]

Yup, totally normal 2 year old stuff. Parenting really is hard. Giving him as much control as you can- like how you let him pick from what was on the table to eat, is good. I used to ask my dd how she wanted her sandwiches cut- squares or triangles EVERY time we made a sandwich- it helped her eat it, but heaven forbid I cut it before asking- she'd go into a meltdown that I cut it wrong, and she wouldn't eat it. EVER. So I'd end up eating the "mistake" and make her a new one, because really, it wasn't worth it.

I've done a lot of things I didn't think I would in the interest in not loosing my mind. I'd have probably let him eat the popsicle first, and then had lunch after that- because I know a popsicle wouldn't fill my kid up, and he'd still be hungry- but that's just how I cope.

[laughymama]

I'm with you.

I have tiny mental breakdowns each day.

Someday though, they will be old enough to fix their own lunches and will become productive members of society and we'll know it was all 100% worth it.....I think.

At least that's what veteran parents keep telling me...

[Abraisme]

Yup, this all sounds totally normal. It got better for me when my DS was about 4.5 or so. He started doing chores, really understanding the rules, stopped throwing major tantrums and was generally a lot more pleasant. I know that's a long way off, but it does get better!

[swd12422]

I'm there, too. The good news, I think, is that I guess I've been consistent in my responses (I'm not particularly tolerant of the toddler indecision combined with Napoleon complext thing) and DS actually starts to have a fit about something and then stops and says, "Next time, Mommy." (He believes it is not only his duty but his God-given right to shut the fridge, freezer, and cabinet doors when I am finished with them. Also putting things in trash/recycling and setting the dishwasher.... But sometimes I forget to ask him to help, and he gets hysterical if he hears something close. Nothing I can do when it's too late, so I just say (apparently), "Oh, I'm sorry. Next time, sweetie.")

Maybe a key phrase he can cling to/recognize would help? Like asking him if he's having a hard time deciding, or if he's frustrated? He may not know the word yet, but he will relatively quickly!

[beckyand3littlemonsters]

Ah the terrible two's i know them well

Luckily caden doesn't have too many melt downs though when he does he has them good and proper i've bitten, smacked, nipped, had my hair pulled and been head butted in the face.

[lisavark]

Hey, OP, our kids' birthdays are a couple of days apart!

So with my DD, I finally figured out that every time she has a meltdown like that it's either because she's tired or because she's hungry. Obviously you knew he was hungry since you were fixing him lunch. But for us I've found that if I time it right then I can USUALLY avoid the meltdowns by feeding her before she's really hungry. I watch the clock now and offer food every two hours. Not sure if that would help with prevention or not...

[Everrgreen]

Oh why did you have to go and burst my bubble? Here I was thinking I was handling toddlerhood (with my almost 17 month old) like a pro! I guess I'm in for it in the coming months? Darn!

[Peacemamalove]

I always enjoyed 2 year olds. 3 is always is the worst. Hugs and hope you get some relief soon!!

[Drummer's Wife]

Originally Posted by Peacemamalove

I always enjoyed 2 year olds. 3 is always is the worst. Hugs and hope you get some relief soon!!

same here. 3 was much more challenging than 2, with all of my children (I'm living it currently ).

But I agree with a PP that it gets better around 4.5. So there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

[laughymama]

Originally Posted by Peacemamalove

I always enjoyed 2 year olds. 3 is always is the worst. Hugs and hope you get some relief soon!!

Oh dear....

[swd12422]

Originally Posted by laughymama

Oh dear....

Yeah, just when you think YOUR child isn't going to have that awful phase, someone says this.... DS is 2.5 and my dad keeps saying, "Only 6 more months and you'll be home free." And I keep telling him that I'm hearing 3 is worse, but he's sure we'll be done at the end of the year. I'm hoping he's right, but...

[barefootmama0709]

My 2.5 year old likes to say "NO!" whenever I ask him if he wants anything, and then throw a fit because I complied and didn't give it to him. He also gets mad if any food he is eating (like toast, a cookie, a cracker) breaks into pieces. He'll still eat it, but he'll cry the entire time.

[shanniesue2]

Originally Posted by Abraisme

Yup, this all sounds totally normal. It got better for me when my DS was about 4.5 or so. He started doing chores, really understanding the rules, stopped throwing major tantrums and was generally a lot more pleasant. I know that's a long way off, but it does get better!

2 more years of this!?!?!?!

Originally Posted by Gillian28

Oh why did you have to go and burst my bubble? Here I was thinking I was handling toddlerhood (with my almost 17 month old) like a pro! I guess I'm in for it in the coming months? Darn!

relax and enjoy it now!

Originally Posted by Peacemamalove

I always enjoyed 2 year olds. 3 is always is the worst. Hugs and hope you get some relief soon!!

Originally Posted by Drummer's Wife

same here. 3 was much more challenging than 2, with all of my children (I'm living it currently ).

But I agree with a PP that it gets better around 4.5. So there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

yeah, I'm not looking forward to 3... I'm a kindergarten teacher right now, but I've worked in daycare with all ages 1-4 (and now up to 6). I must say, of all the ages, 3 is my least favorite. I really like 4 though!

[shanniesue2]

I also wanted to add that for the first time today, I referred to my child as spirited. Now that I'm off for the summer, I've had a few opportunities to go to several toddler type events (mommy and me gymnastics, library story time, camping with a mom's group, etc.) And what I've noticed is that while he's not misbehaving or doing anything that isn't age appropriate, he seems to be doing everything 100 times more intensely than other kids his age. He is SOOOOOOO curious and into everything. He goes NONSTOP (and I am saying this in comparison to watching lots of other twos). Someone has to have an eye on him at all times... or else... his tantrums seem more intense. he will not slow down to hardly even sleep. He's just so independent and a free thinker. He wants to do everything in his own time and in his own way... And on the positive side, he is so incredibly inquisitive, charming, funny, talkative, and curious. I mean I really am head over heals in love with my son...

he's just so intense about everything he does and he wears me out!

[Katie T]

I agree with you, I think that 3 is even worse and 10 is really challenging for me between hormones and attitude, I find my patients lacks for her at times. I need to pick up some more books on parenting a "tween" (and recs?)