can't put baby down..

[jolesh]

anyone else have this problem? i try to wear him as much as possible and i love holding him, but sometimes i have to get something hot out of the oven or unload the dishwasher, and he just screams. he REALLY doesn't want to be put down ever. and he doesn't seem happy with anyone BUT me. not that there is anyone else around these days (hubby is on a deadline so not around for more than an hour a day...)

what is everyone else's experience? are some babies happier on their own or are all babies wanting to be held 24/7??

btw, we cosleep so it isn't like he is EVER alone

[blessedwithboys]

ddcc from new posts

both of my boys were like this. thank goodness they were 7.5 yrs apart so i had a break from the intensity! i learned to do a back carry with the sling so i could cook, wash dishes, and fold laundry. by about 3-4 mos i could do this.

[jenfl]

That can be really rough. DD was like that, although DH could hold her while he was around.

DS is usually like that, and it's really hard because he won't be in a carrier if he's awake. We've been able to get a couple, 5-minute happy spells looking at the baby gym, but it's not common.

The worst is when I'm doing bath and bedtime for them both on my own. I have to put DS down to wash DD and he'll just scream in the tiny bathroom. Then he won't calm down for her bedtime, and will scream through her massage and story....

So, yeah. I've gotten good at doing many things one-handed.

[Knitting Mama]

Yeah, Cecilia's like this for the most part. The only exception is her morning nap in the swing. Otherwise, it's all about doing things one handed or wearing her in the wrap.

[Laneybug]

Ummm, my girlie HATES being worn. Either that, or I am totally inept at wearing her. I have the moby, maya wrap and baby k'tan and the only position she likes is FFO, but that's good for about 10 minutes before she's overstimulated.

She even seems happier out of my arms (or anybody's arms for that matter) unless she's nursing or really tired. She seems to enjoy the bouncer and swing where she can look around...which is kinda sad because I figured I'd be wearing her all the time. I'm hoping as her neck strengthens she'll like the carriers more. So yeah, I kinda WISH my baby wanted to be in my arms all the time! Oh well. Maybe she's just an independent little thing.

[dogretro]

Oh, yes, a few weeks ago dd2 discovered that being held was WAY more awesome than laying somewhere by herself. I prefer to carry newborns upright against my left shoulder, so it's not too challenging to do things w/ my right (dominant) hand. The hardest part comes in about another month where she will want to turn herself to look forward (the direction I am looking in), but will not be big enough to ride on my hip yet. It's just awkward that way.

I can get dd2 to lay in her crib & look at her fish mobile or ride in the swing for a few minutes in the morning. Long enough for me to get ready for the day anyway. That is pretty much all I ask & she obliges, courteous little thing. While I usually carry her in my arms, I also will wear her on my back in the Kozy Carrier or on my front in the ring sling. Also, I am going to tell you something horrible: Sometimes they just have to cry. If I have to get something out of the oven, I lay dd2 on the carpet, get the thing out, then pick her back up. Yup, she is already crying. Nope, she is not going to die or get brain damage from crying for less than one minute. She is also kid number two, so there are times when I REALLY cannot hold her/pick her up b/c I HAVE to do something v important for dd1, like help her on the potty. Sometimes I have to go to the bathroom, or wash my hands, or wash dd1's hands, or whatever. The important thing is that I always come back and pick her up; that is what she will learn, not that I just abandon her to her own devices. I really don't see holding her a lot as a problem b/c I knew it was coming. I actually usually enjoy it b/c I love newborns so much! It's over before you know it! I think I actually hold dd2 more than I held dd1 b/c 2 screams much more quickly upon being set down.

Laneybug, our second foster baby truly loved her bouncy seat, too! I would feel bad about not holding her, but she LOVED being in there and looking around, even to the point where she did not want to be rocked to sleep, but rather bounced!!! She was one of the happiest most friendly babies I have ever met, too, so it wasn't like she was trying to avoid us.

[GreenTeaGinger61]

Rowena came into the world so mellow, so willing to wait her turn, and then she turned into the baby who couldn't be put down. I have about ten minutes in the morning when she sleeps, and then another 15 once she wakes (she allows herself to be entertained by her brother then) to get breakfast for us all. After that if she's put down she screams, and sometimes that's just the way it has to be.

I am trying to master the backhold in my mai tei but still pretty insecure with it. I'm hoping it will make doing anything a bit easier. And don't get me wrong, I LOVE holding her but I have just move and have three other kids so sometimes it drives me a bit mad.

[rhiOrion]

L usually gives me a good long nap in the swing in the morning. And now that she's discovered her adoration for mobiles I can usually snatch a few minutes here and there.

But, even though she's a first kid, there are still just times when she has to cry. But I agree that the important thing is that I always come back. There have also been times where I just absolutely cannot deal with her flailing anymore, so I put her in the swing and sit with her and talk to her, but I just can't deal with being kicked anymore. Last night she had been screaming most of the day and I'd been wearing a screaming baby all day, so DH put her in the swing and sat with her and played guitar. It's not my ideal way to deal with it, but you gotta do what you gotta do, and it has to be done without injuring her.

I had these ideas before she was born that she would NEVER have to cry anywhere but in our arms. Ha. The universe decided I needed to be humbled, I guess.

[Elecampane]

I have one of those babies too. I find it's worse in the evenings. Usually during the day she is amenable to hanging out in the swing or bouncy seat for five to ten minutes while I make coffee, shower, etc. But after her afternoon nap forget about it. She requires being held at all times until bed and it's exhausting, especially as the evenings are so busy.

My baby doesn't care to be worn while awake, either, so that hasn't helped me at all. I hope that gets better as she gets older and better able to hold her head up and look around at things. I am way too scared of trying back carries at this age. And actually the mei tai is the carrier she seems to hate the most.

With a 3.75 year old, though, there are times I simply have to let the baby cry for two or three minutes--pottying, getting food or drinks, comforting, etc. It makes me a nervous wreck--I can't stand to hear my baby cry!--but what can I do.

[jolesh]

today my LO is going against expectations and chilling out in the window seat. and i owe it all to a new swaddling blanket that i sewed. he is so big that normal blankets don't reach around him, but i made an extra large one and voila - he is happy as a clam. maybe i am jinxing it by writing this (please no!) but i never had faith in the power of the swaddle until now!

[ann_of_loxley]

Have you managed to put him on your back yet? I really really suggest you try and get the hang of that! - Seriousy...its SO freeing!!! Now that we have mastered (well roughtly - I still wouldn't attempt it in public yet! hehe) back carries in the wrap (though at the moment he is in the pod on my back) - I can do SO much more! (like put something in the oven/take it out - do the washing, hang up the laundry, etc etc). For showers I still have to wait until he is well rested and well up so I can put him down in the bouncer seat and he can smile and coo at me whilst I sing to him and quickly wash up! Then he is back on my back whilst I iron and do what I can until I can pop him off - pop my clothes back on and then quickly pop him back on in the sling! hehe (I am getting good at putting him on my back in a matter of seconds with all this practice! hehe)

And yes - if he is swaddles (even when awake) - he tends to be much happier. And I guess thats why he loves the slings so much too...his body is all tightly held still. Cause I think part of the problem at this age is that they don't have control over their limbs but those limbs are always moving!!! Must be a crazy experience! (probably why we can't remember that far back! hehe)

[jolesh]

ann what kind of carrier are you using to put him on your back?? i am worried about my LOs neck not being strong enough quite yet, though he is getting pretty good with lifting his head and stuff... but still.. how do you know when it is ok?

[ann_of_loxley]

You can do it from birth if you know what you are doing and are brave enough! lol

I put him on my back with a woven wrap (never use stretchy ones). Though I have also managed it with my podegi.

It looks complicated and you may think you can't do it...but desperate times call for desperate measures lol - and it is amazing how quick and good you can become at it!

There are some FAB videos on youtube!!! (very helpful!)

[Knitting Mama]

Can you recommend any particular videos for back wearing noobs, Ann?

[GreenTeaGinger61]

My friend did a back carry using her (my LOL) Mai Tei for her new babies. I am going to try it once dh gets home so I can have some help. With the mei tai, it's similiar to doing a front carry, you have to make sure the material is high enough to support the baby's neck.

I'm not sure R will like it though. She likes the sling only when I'm moving and she's sleepy. What she really likes when she's awake is for me to hold her upright so she can see everyone. Ai. That said yesterday we went shopping and she was awake. I carried her high up so she could see and she LOVED it.

[ann_of_loxley]

Originally Posted by Cecilia's Mama

Can you recommend any particular videos for back wearing noobs, Ann?

This one is fab - my fav! She is very helpful and has a few videos!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2amR7Z6UwA

[ann_of_loxley]

Oooo...she has a selendang video up... I have done that carry with a wrap - but it looks more comfy with a selendang...

Gonna get one and let you all know! (by the way - they look about $20 so cheap!)

[jolesh]

darn. i haven't got a carrier that will accomodate a LO at 8 weeks. and i can't spend any more $$ on another one. he doesn't seem to want to be in a carrier today anyway lol...

[lurve]

my first baby was like this. until she was three! i am totally serious.... back carries. i have put my new baby in a back carry starting at two weeks old with a mei tei

[triony]

Wow! That is a great video. I just convinced DH to let me get a Mei Tei and a RS. No way I can sweet talk a woven wrap. Wish I'd done a little more research before registering for the Moby!!