River's birth story
River, this is the story of your birth. You were due on June 20th but we welcomed you to the world on June 14th after a short labor.
Your daddy and I planned to have you at home in South Africa with a midwife. After having a mostly natural birth with your brother, Rigel, 3 years ago, we knew that we made a great laboring team and trusted the labor process. We met a really nice midwife, Marianne, who had been doing homebirths for almost 20 years and we felt confident that you would be received into to welcoming and safe hands.
At the 37 week midwife appointment at our house Marianne said that I wasn't measuring as if you were growing very much in utero and she suggested that I go have an ultrasound at the OB office. I'd been measuring less than 50% for the entire pregnancy, but now I was about 10% so off we went to the OB office. When we got to see you the OB said that indeed you were measuring small, but given that neither your Daddy nor I are very large, he couldn't tell whether you being small was because you were just designed to be small or because your placenta wasn't working as well as it should be. He scheduled another scan in 2 weeks and we went home to rest and "eat like a horse".
At the 38 week midwife appointment Marianne said my fundal height measurement still hadn't changed and later that week the ultrasound showed that indeed you were still the same size you'd been 2 weeks previously. At this point the OB, in consultation with Marianne, said that you should be induced soon and that homebirth was not a very good option because while you were doing well in utero at the time the stress of labor could change things. I was quite disappointed River. I'd been looking forward to welcoming you to this world in my home with a birth tub surrounded by familiarity and knowing that you'd stay within my arms after birth. We hadn't looked at any hospital labor and delivery wards here in South Africa and I was overwhelmed by the not knowing and the worrying. I wanted to do what was best for you and didn't doubt the Dr and midwife's opinion, but I did mourn the change of plans. The induction was scheduled for Tuesday, June 15th, and your daddy and I went to Kirstenbosch botanical gardens to walk together and process your now very upcoming arrival.
Once I knew that you were going to be coming within the week it did help me focus on you and look forward to your arrival in a new way. You see, I tend to have really easy pregnancies which is wonderful, but with Rigel it meant that I only discovered well into labor that I hadn't really processed that I was having a baby. Once I knew that you were really coming by a certain date, I was able to really think about you and get ready to have you.
On Saturday, June 12th we went as a family to the farmer's market as always hoping that next Saturday we'd be able to bring you. On Sunday we met with Marianne at Vincent Palotti hospital just to check you with the monitor (you were doing very well). She also checked me to see how receptive to an induction I'd be. One of her concerns and mine were that I'd go in for an induction on Tuesday but that my body wouldn't be ready so the process would be long and perhaps involve more interventions than we'd wish. She said I was 1 cm and think. We decided to use a foley catheter to try to get my body more receptive to induction. At 12 PM she put it in and I went home with your daddy. Rigel and I ran around in the rain squirting each other with water and your daddy and I talked over our hopes for you before heading to bed. Right before falling asleep the foley catheter fell out and with it my mucus plug. Maybe things were really happening!
On Monday morning, June 14th, at 2:30 I woke up with light contractions. Not having a clock on my side of the bed I didn't know how close together they were. Figuring it would be a long while if this was indeed the real thing, I tried to fall back asleep. At 3:30AM your daddy even gave me a gentle backrub to see if that would help but while I was comfortable, sleep would not come. I labored through the night, the contractions getting stronger but still bearable. I focused on my breathing and on you. It was actually quite a precious time. In the quiet of the night I told you that I was really looking forward to meeting you; that you weren't growing inside like you needed to and that when you came out I'd take care of you. For the next several hours I labored, with contractions probably 5-7 minutes apart. After a contraction you'd move around inside of me like never before- I joked to myself that you were really a world cup baby and were probably doing the Diski dance in there. With all that movement I didn't worry that you weren't handling the contractions well. I figured that sometime between 7 and 8 AM your brother would wake up, we'd take him to school for the day, I'd take a shower and then we'd head into the hospital at some point.
At 7:30AM at the height of a contraction I felt a gush down my leg and figured that my water had broken. I grabbed a tissue to wipe it up and the tissue was bright red. I ran to the toilet and more blood gushed down. I was scared. Fluid I expected but not blood. I was scared that it meant that your placenta was detaching and called for your daddy. He brought me the cell phone while I sat on the toilet and I called Marianne. She said I should head into the hospital and while I tried to clean myself up your daddy got Rigel ready for school. The minutes felt long and I no longer felt your strong diski dance movements. We dropped Rigel off at school without a final family photo and rushed to the hospital. The trip felt long, even with the reduced rush hour traffic thanks to the world cup game later that day. About 1/2 way to the hospital I felt you move and breathed a bit easier.
We arrived at the hospital at about 8:40AM and went up to the maternity ward where we were met by Marianne. She put me on a monitor and we immediately heard the strong beat of your heart. Marianne checked me and I was about 3 cm dilated and 60-70 percent effaced. She figured that the bleeding was likely from my cervix and we decided that we'd stay at the hospital until you arrived. After some time on the monitor and a quick conversation with the OB on call (of course the OB we'd met with earlier was on vacation for the week) Marianne said I could get off the monitor for a while and into the bath. It felt so good! Your daddy went down to move the car, get our bags, and figure out the finances of South African health care (he ended up having to charge the expected 24 hour birth on his credit card before they allowed him back up to the maternity ward) and I relaxed in the warm water. When I was laboring with your brother I had hoped for a water birth but even a shower slowed down my contractions so never had the chance to labor surrounded by water. With you I figured that even if it slowed labor down for a while it was worth enjoying while it lasted. I was still expecting a long labor with more time on the monitor confined close to the bed if not in bed itself- a prospect I was not looking forward to. Your daddy was soon back in the room and turned on the labor playlist that I'd put together in the previous weeks. The contractions were still very present, probably 4 minutes apart, but short and quite manageable. I continued to bleed with almost every contraction and the water turned progressively more red but Marianne was confident that it was my cervix and not the placenta and your dopplered heart tones were strong and reactive. At one point the Doctor came into check on me and was quite surprised to see the color of the water but Marianne ushered him out of the room and must have reassured him because we didn't see him again. When she returned she said that I would need to spend some more time on the monitor around 1PM- this was probably around 12 or so.
I was not looking forward to the monitor. The water was lovely. Between contractions I was comfortable to talk with your daddy and during contractions I would lay on my side in the water and breathe deeply. Marianne suggested I hold my breath for a while after a deep inhale so that you'd get more oxygen. I'd repeat the pattern of breath, hold, exhale 2-3 times during a contraction and then it would pass. Like with your brother I felt these contractions down the sides of my legs and in my butt- I guess that's just how I labor. For the most part I didn't want to be touched during labor. I loved holding your daddy's hand but didn't not enjoy massage or pressure during a contraction. I know I told Marianne "don't touch me" at several points when she was trying to ease me through a contraction. She immediately would respect my wishes. I was in quite an internal place, holding your daddy's hand, listening to music, and breathing through the surges. At one point I told your daddy that I needed some encouragement. While I was managing the contractions well, I was worried that it would be a full day of this with little change. I didn't want to get out of the water and I was nervous about the upcoming 1PM check to see how much progress I'd made. While I wanted to hear that things were really progressing I feared finding out that they weren't.
As 1PM drew closer Marianne asked if I was feeling any pressure. I said I wasn't. By the next contraction I was. Perhaps things were happening afterall! 1PM came and went without a check and I began to feel increasingly pushy. I still didn't really believe I could be at that point already when it took days of labor and some pitocin to get to 10cm with your brother. After several pushy contractions I reached inside and could feel your bag of waters. You really were moving and I was going to meet you soon! I spent most of the pushing time laying on my side holding onto your daddy's hand and arm. During a contraction I'd pull on him and bear down- because it felt better to do so than not to. Every couple I'd check where you were and soon I could feel your head inside the bulging bag. As you descended I knelt in the water and soon you were right there ready to come out. I remembered when I first saw your brother's head when I was laboring with him and knew that indeed I'd be meeting you soon! After just another couple pushes your bag of water was bulging outside of me and your head was close behind. I felt very stretched but knew that indeed I'd be meeting you very soon. With the next contraction I pushed and out you came all at once- the waters breaking as you emerged. I lifted you out of the water and held your tiny vernix covered body in my arms!
You were so small but so beautiful! You needed a little help clearing some mucus and Marianne instructed me to cover your nose and mouth with mine and suck out the fluid that was there. Once I did that and we unwrapped the cord from around your neck you began to breath and pink up. I held you in my arms with your daddy behind me and we marveled at you. You had arrived River! Within a couple of minutes I put you to the breast and you began to drink. You would do so almost without stop for the next 2 hours. Daddy cut the cord once it had stopped pulsing. I held you for probably about 10- 15 minutes before we drained the water from the bath and I birthed the placenta with you in my arms. Then I passed you off to your daddy for some skin to skin time while I rinsed myself off in the bath and then got out. Marianne weighed you- you were 2680 kg (5 pounds 14 ounces) and just under 19 inches long. Daddy handed you back to me and once again you began to nurse. We decided that we wanted to leave the hospital that day if possible and Marianne finished all the discharge paperwork before heading off to another birth. You were a little cool at one point so we got to spend some time snuggled under a baby heat blanket together at which point you were just fine. We stayed in the hospital with you until 7:30PM and then drove home. By 8PM we were home. We had only been gone for 12 hours and we were delighted to have you safe in our arms!
While birth hadn't been the homebirth we had planned, in every other way it had been the natural, welcoming water birth that I had hoped for. Given your small size and my bleeding your daddy and I likely would have been more nervous at home than we would have hoped anyway. I treasure the experience of getting to meet you and gain such trust in my body all at the same time. Thank you River Zaziwe Elizabeth! Over the last 4 days we've begun to get to know one another and I look forward to continuing to get to do so in the days, weeks and years to come.
Minutes Old
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Home Sweet Home
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Family of 4!
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s I'm sorry that you won't get the birth you were anticipating. I hope that you can have a peaceful birth in spite of an induction and hospital environment!
Sometimes if your NST is reassuring they'll let you wait a few days before inducing.
