Thinking of changing my name, maybe kids' names too - Page 2

[treqi]

I don't get how people feel this is a bad thing. My XH has no involvement with my daughter (maybe a phone call every 3-6 months) and I feel my father is more her dad than anyone else. My ex dictated the terms of our divorce and so I got the one little thing I wanted and that was to share my family name with my daughter. I really dont see any bad unless the children are in school.

[Labbemama]

I'm an adult child of divorce and I felt very strongly when my mother had my stepfather adopt us and our names were changed. I felt I didn't belong to EITHER family and was so excited when I took my husbands name.

I just got my name legally changed to a random name not my maiden name so ex could not find me. I am going thru all the difficulties of setting up a new identity.

But I can understand, I felt like I would barf if anyone called me MRS. Married Name.

I feel like a phoney right now with the alias but well what can you do.

I did choose a last name of a favorite man in my life, ex would never guess it.

But no I didn't change the kids' names. I have two girls and one son, so the girls will get married and change their names, and my son, sigh, I guess can get his name changed when he's 18 if it means that much to him. He's 15 now. All of my kids want different names to feel safe.

But I object to changing kids names for any reason other than personal safety.

[Goodmom2008]

Did you check with your attorney to see if having sole legal custody actually gives you the right to change the kids' last name without the consent of the father? Because chances are it may not.

Besides, why would you do that? Unless they are very young and don't know their last names, it will confuse them unnecessarily.

[Bad Mama Jama]

i changed my dd's last name legally and haven't looked back since. my thought was my ex was not handling medical appointment, daycare pick-ups and drop-offs, etc at the time (and none at all since we haven't seen him in years). she would share my last name since i have to do the heavy lifting and handle all of the responsiblity.