Need suggestions for drying up milk (birth loss)

[Mommy2Liz]

My dear friend's sister's baby was born still last night. She is approaching these days of engorgement and milk coming in. Could anyone offer some suggestions of ways to comfortably help her through the physical discomfort? I know of cabbage leaves, but I'm not sure how it works. Any advice is appreciated.

[expatmommy]

It is painfully hard to face a postpartum body without a baby to hold.

I had mixed emotions when my milk came in. It was hard to have that reminder, but also a comfort that at least in one way my body knew how to sustain life. It was bittersweet when I finally stopped producing milk.

In the pregnancy loss forum here there are some old threads on what to do when milk comes in that you might find some helpful info to read. Earth Mama makes some pregnancy loss products, including a no more milk tea. I also found this bosom bandit product that might also help with engorgement and pain.

I'm really very sorry for your friend's sister.

[Llyra]

I wondering if pseudoephedrine could maybe help. It's found in a lot of cold medicines or OTC medicines for nasal congestion. In some places, like here in NJ, you may have to ask for it at the counter. It's designed to dry out your mucus membranes, but it's got a reputation for seriously reducing milk supply in mamas with established lactation, so I would guess it would be of help in this situation. I took it a few times, unknowingly, when DD1 was a few months old, and my pumping output dropped dramatically by about twelve ounces a day.

That's such a terrible sad situation. My DS1 didn't survive birth. This was eight years ago now, and I still carry the pain with me. I think it's wonderful that you are thinking of ways to ease her through the difficult days ahead.

[PatioGardener]

So sorry to hear.

pseudoephedrine (brand name: sudafed but you have to get it from the pharmacist, it is no longer on the store shelves) will work well if taken as described on the box. Best to take around the clock for several days then taper. Pump to comfort only.

How heartbreaking.

[blessedwithboys]

please pass on my condolences

keep the cabbage very cold, even in a bowl of ice water. have the mama wear a snug fitting bra and line the cups with cabbage leaves. change them out as they warm up. the same leaves can be reused over and over as long as they are put back to chill in between bra time.

sudafed and maybe benadryl are good.

remind her that stimulation will keep the milk in production, so if she is painfully engorged the best thing to do is get in a comfortably hot shower and turn her back to the water. let the heat allow the breasts to release some milk. hand expression and pumping will encourage milk production. if she just cant get herself in the shower, hand expressing a small spoonful is ok, but not ideal.

breast-binding was already no longer being recommended when i had ds1 in 1994. i think a well-fitting wirefree bra is great, but i would ask an LC about any kind of tight constriction due to risk of plugged ducts. if she uses a breas bandit, it should be snug for support, but not tight as if to try to stop up the milk from coming out.

[Megan73]

There's truly nothing worse than having breasts full of milk and no baby to feed.
I found bags of frozen peas made good cold packs to relieve the discomfort. Cabbage leaves do help, too.

[Mommy2Liz]

Thank you so much for the advice and kind words. I am also very sorry for you who have lost sweet babies. Thank you for passing on your love.

[marinak1977]

I am so sorry for the mama and her family.

[mae14]

She could try drinking sage tea. When my daughter weaned, it took drinking the tea for just over a day and my engorgement was gone.

[meg_shannon]

Cabergoline

Cabergoline is a drug normally prescribed to HIV positive mothers to prevent their milk from coming in. It has been prescribed off label in the UK (not sure about the US).

My mother's friend, who lost a baby at birth years ago, was just going to deal with the engorgement until someone pointed out that milk banks are always looking for donations. I have heard of other women donating the milk meant for their baby to cope, and to provide another baby with breast milk. Obviously this is a personal decision.

[cristeen]

I looked into donating through milkshare with my loss, but wound up not doing it. If she can stand the thought, it can be good to know that your body is nourishing another child. But many women can't deal with it.

For me, I had a small manual pump and used it just enough to take away the pain. Together with warm showers, that was enough for me.

[Bellabaz]

Sage tea. i am very sorry for your friend's sister. Hugs to her.