Hi, I would like to join but, honestly, I feel I am dangerously close to my breaking point with my SO. It is so hard and draining and it makes me so sad and angry and I can't be there for my children that need a functional parent and deserve a peaceful home.
We have been together for almost 8 yrs and have 3 children together. I also have a son 7 yrs older than our oldest. I am immensely grateful for all my children and I do love my SO, but he has had trouble with depression forever, and pretty much throughout our relationship.
I finally got to the point where I was totally miserable and realized that I had put myself in that position. I grew up in a dysfunctional household with a depressed/bipolar(?) mother and I really felt I should have known better. I also wanted better for my children, both now and in future relationships. I also didn't want to break up the family and like I said, I do love him. I feel i tried everything and everything just made it worse. I tried being angry, being passive, ignoring him, indulging him, researching everything I could in terms of treatment, meds diet...'t interested and it only fueled his resentment. I finally decided I needed some therapy to deal with it and I started setting some limits. This has led to SO living with his parents for the past 6 months. It is just ridiculous.
I have so much more I could write but life is busy with 4 children and I have to go deal with more bs concerning SO and a fairly serious incident we had yesterday
I am trying to keep in mind the saying "to accept the things that I can not change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference."