how do you deal with all the junk food?!?!? - Page 2

[JessicaS]

Ya know I really disagree.

How many of us grew up with great grandparents or grandparents who lived through the depression?

We were raised to be grateful for anything we were given. Our parents still say "you were fed junk and you are fine" and things like that.

Our kids generation is proof that we are not fine. There were three peanut, wheat, eggs and all sorts of allergies in my daughter's class. What have we done to ourselves?

We aren't fine and people need to wake up. Junkfood all the time is not good for us, we did not turn out fine.

http://abcnews.go.com/Health/Diet/story?id=1355795

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27319364/

http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/databriefs/db10.htm

http://www.childrensmemorial.org/dep...rgy/study.aspx

The rate of food allergies is increasing and fast

It isn't the "grateful for every little thing" times anymore. We are the "do not give my kid anything without asking" generation. I might be more lax with grandparents but I would be mad if another parent was giving my kid tons of junk.

I do see myself as pretty relaxed on the issue but I am sure some parents see me as extremely strict. I know what it is like to have issues with not being able to eat certain foods or reactions from certain foods and I don't want my kids to have those same problems. I was raised on tons of processed foods and now they make me sick. I don't avoid buying Zatarains because it has cooties, I don't buy it because it is full of MSG and makes me sick. I don't like being doubled over in pain.

[taramoon13]

Originally Posted by mamadelbosque

Some capri suns are 100% juice - its just a glorified juice box. And I do buy them for when we go out as a treat, so I personaly don't see them as all bad. As for the cookies/candy, unless its the same kid there w/ that stuff everyday, you don't really know that its not a special treat for them too. DS1 gets juiceboxes/capris suns once or twice a week at playgroup and theres sometimes a cookie there too.

I honestly suspect its just because you live beside the playgruond that you see it all the time. Chances are those kids are getting them as a treat too. Only you see different kids w/ treats every day so it seems constant, yk??

actually, these are kids that live in our court that ds plays with 2-4 times a week, goes to their house on occasion and i'm friendly with the moms so i know for a fact that they eat junk all the time.
secondly, i guess i should've been more clear in the fact that if people were bringing out homemade cookies or 100% juice frozen pops i wouldn't mind nearly as much. we NEVER buy cookies, ice cream, juice, etc. to keep in our house. if we want a treat ds helps me make cookies or we have a nice homemade dessert from a restaurant we trust not to put crap.
everyone is entitled to their own opinion and IMO having capri-sun/juice boxes and processed cookies 2-3 times a week is way too much especially when you add that to maybe going to a b-day party or getting a treat as a family. i would call that getting into a habit at that point which is exactly what i'm trying to avoid.
i completely appreciate that people are just trying to be friendly, generous, etc. when they offer stuff, i just wish they'd ask me first before it gets stuck in ds' face, THAT i feel is common courtesy.

[mamadelbosque]

So, they should do what? Go hide behind a tree while they eat their food so's your kid doesn't see it? Honestly, I was *that kid* who only ate healthy and wasn't allowed to eat "junk food", and I have *zero* interest in making my kids be 'those kids'. Because it sucked. It really did. We weren't allowed pop or chips or juice boxes or anything of the sort growing up, and it sucked, and I know it did and I, as a result, have zero interest in making my kids be 'those kids'. So, when its offered, we accept. When we're at storytime or playgroup or friends' and theres a special snack or a juice box or whatever, they get it. Because its not everyday, and its not going to hurt. But whatever.

[DariusMom]

Originally Posted by ccohenou

I agree, and suggest the same to you. That's why I suggest being gracious and flexible with others and not letting food-correctness get in the way of relationships.

Originally Posted by ccohenou

Well, considering other well-intentioned people as "junk peddlers," rather than people who wanted to give something they considered good to your kid, is pretty ungracious by itself. Whether you graciously accept or graciously decline is up to you. It does seem odd at a liquor store since children are not allowed inside liquor stores in my area.

In any case, if you can think of three examples and one of them is from a year ago, it doesn't sound like this is an everyday, seriously health-threatening issue.

I completely agree.

[calebsmommy25]

OP- I would be very frustrated if this is each and every day. If I sound like a meanie to other parents, so be it. Is there a way you could offer some healthier alternatives that would be fun for the kids? Not that it should be your responsibility, but maybe it would catch on? Homemade freeze pops can be inexpensive and very healthy. We just made some a couple weeks ago. We put a mix of berries, and a splash of juice in a blender and poured them into the molds. How about veggies, cheese, pitas cut into fun shapes with hummus for dippers?

I don't know. I feel you are in a tough position. It shouldn't be up to you to do anything, offer healthier versions, etc., but if you don't like it maybe you could change it. Are there any other parents that feel the same? Maybe band together and write a letter to all of the parents? Try not to sound accusatory or rude in any way. How about hosting a community health fair, focused on children's eating habits? Maybe some of these other parents really DON'T KNOW what is in the food they are feeding their children (if it is all the time.). It is baffling what some parents don't know out there. If it was my neighborhood, and if I had some extra time, I would seriously consider it.

Thankfully, in my town everyone is very healthy in all aspects. Organics, locally grown food, general wellness ideals are very easy to come by here. We def. do have treats though. An occasional one at home, but most of the time we reserve the treats for family parties (which are NOT health oriented!).

I grew up on freezie pops and huggie 'juice' drinks in the summer. IMO, (now) I think they are disgusting. I cringe even thinking of DS ingesting the artificial food coloring and HFCS. That is one thing I just do not want to budge on. If he is going to have a treat, I would much rather it be a good piece of dark chocolate with his Mama...

[InMediasRes]

I agree that you shouldn't be rude, but you have every right to refuse (graciously). But I don't see how it's any better to be a health food pusher than a junk food pusher.

I'm only 25, and when I was a kid running around the neighborhood, no one ate anyone's food. Maybe my area was an anomoly, but I don't remember kids bringing out tons of snacks ever 20 min when we were outside. But that seems to be the norm.

And yeah, my kids play outside every day. For hours. The neighborhood kids usually make 4-5 trips inside to get candy, Pringles, bright red fruit punch, etc. That is way more than "every once in a while", and it makes me feel like I can't give them the homemade stuff that I enjoy making.

[JessicaS]

Originally Posted by taramoon13

why do parents give their kids SO much junk food? it drives me crazy! we eat very well and like to have ice cream or a nice dessert sometimes that we share with ds (almost 3). he also gets to eat junk when he goes to b-day parties, halloween, etc. i am proud of him because he really does seem to understand what treats are & that they are for special times. he STILL talks about the one time he's ever had a lollipop, when he went to see santa for the first time. i find this touching. dh & i were both made to feel like outsiders by our parents when it came to food and we decided early on that we did not want to have it be like this for ds. there's got to be a happy medium though!! there's a playground in front on our house and it seems like there's constantly some kid out there with capri-sun, cookies, candy that i'm having to say "no, thank-you" to for ds (which ds honestly doesn't seem to care either way). the other day his little pal brought a capri-sun out for him and he already had it in his hand, so i let him have it because i just couldn't be a total meanie. if this happened once in a while i really wouldn't mind, but when you add it all up it's just too much! i realize that as he gets older i won't be able to control everything he eats outside the house which is why we are trying to give him healthy habits now. i just wish i didn't even have to deal with it at all. ds rarely even wants to eat when he's outside, he's too busy playing!!!

Quoting the OP since there seems to be confusion.

She didn't say she denied treats or junk. She said it needs to be in moderation. She also said she didn't want her kids to feel like outsiders in regard to food

[sunnysandiegan]

My DD is 9 now. We dealt with it differently at each age/stage. Our main focus has always been within our house and within our choices, we eat healthy foods most of the time and have treats once in awhile.

Up until preschool, DD was mostly with me and she always had healthy food. About the only "treats" up until then were the first few birthday parties within our various social circles at that time. She didn't care for any of those treats, so we kept on feeding her as usual and introducing more and more healthy foods, building up her taste buds for these types of foods. She did go to daycare part-time and I just made sure she had a healthy breakfast and dinner and didn't worry about the rest on those days (2-3 days a week). The bulk of her food was coming from us.

In preschool, they fed all the kids a hot lunch as part of the curriculum (social skills) and it was pretty healthy considering the state laws of serving food, etc. She went three days a week and again, I made sure she was fed a healthy breakfast and dinner those days and didn't worry about the rest.

In school, she takes her lunch nearly every day by choice. She much prefers our food to school lunch. She buys lunch roughly once a month and it is totally up to her. When packing her lunch/snacks for school, she chooses one item (or more) from each of our categories. When choosing a snack after school, she makes choices based on what she ate already that day. Our dinners almost always consist of a little bit of meat protein and plenty of vegetables (raw and cooked), so we keep that in mind in our daily choices.

I am all about teaching her to handle these things herself. I'm not with her at school and she is offered all kinds of junk. In Kindergarten, the kids used to swap snacks and lunches, etc. She quickly learned she didn't care for too much junk food (made her feel icky) and she learned who else ate healthy like her (supported her tastes and traded new foods she liked). It was a good learning tool for all of us. I learned new foods to get for her lunches and she learned who to hang out with and share food with. She's in third grade now and I don't hear any more swapping food stories, but I do know who she sits with at lunch and I've been on field trips and see who brings what for lunch/snacks. Our area has a large percentage of "healthy eaters", so she isn't "that kid" around here.

At home, we've loosened up over time. I felt it was most important to develop the tastes for healthy food early on and then gradually introduce "treats". We mostly prepare our treats from scratch anyway, which still fits into my health goals. This calendar year (since Christmas), I loosened up a lot and let her learn for herself how much junk food effects her body and mood. I made mental notes first on when she ate a lot of sugary foods what her behavior was. Then, on vacation in April, DH & I purposely talked about how food made us feel and what we could eat to feel better in a place we didn't know well, etc. She got into the concept. When we got home, she wanted more junk food snacks than usual and I went ahead and bought them. Then, I helped her make the connection between her moods/behavior/choices and the food she was eating. I encouraged her to keep a food journal for over a month and to add her feelings to it. She didn't want to and then she did. She figured it out on her own at that point. Her choices have been reflecting this newfound understanding and she has been expressing her new understanding in the grocery store, which is avoiding bringing the junk home in the first place (like it used to be).

I wanted to give her this experience much, much younger than I got it. I was in my twenties before I figured it out and that made it really, really hard to retrain my taste buds. I grew up on junk food and fast food and soda. Changing my tastes has been a long, hard road. I felt she needed some of the lessons, but also felt guidance would benefit her greatly and the earlier the better....ONCE we had established her baseline tastes. For me (based on reading and intuition), I felt the first five years were important to keep her food intake as healthy as possible while teaching when we have more control and when we don't. After that, it was time.

DD accepts some treats offered, but also knows how to politely say, "no thanks". She judges for herself each day what will make her feel good and what will potentially make her feel bad. This goes beyond "healthy foods" and "junk foods". At age 8, she ended up getting food poisoning three times from "healthy foods". That is when I realized she needed more autonomy in her choices. Only part of the lesson had sunk in over time. I point blank told her she didn't have to eat ANYTHING (even healthy food) she felt was not good for her. We've been working on distinguishing "off" smells and looks from "odd" smells and looks of foods.

Everyone is doing the best they can with the knowledge they have at the time.

[taramoon13]

Originally Posted by mamadelbosque

So, they should do what? Go hide behind a tree while they eat their food so's your kid doesn't see it? Honestly, I was *that kid* who only ate healthy and wasn't allowed to eat "junk food", and I have *zero* interest in making my kids be 'those kids'. Because it sucked. It really did. We weren't allowed pop or chips or juice boxes or anything of the sort growing up, and it sucked, and I know it did and I, as a result, have zero interest in making my kids be 'those kids'. So, when its offered, we accept. When we're at storytime or playgroup or friends' and theres a special snack or a juice box or whatever, they get it. Because its not everyday, and its not going to hurt. But whatever.

the whole point of my post was that of course they shouldn't go hide behind a tree with their treats and how to deal with it in another more civilized manner. if you refer back to my OP you'll see that i clearly stated the same thing you wrote - dh and i were both one of "those kids" growing up and trying to find a happy medium now for ds. i guess it kinda sucked being one of "those kids" growing up, but i feel now that i have healthy eating habits that were formed from the very beginning. if you think it's "not going to hurt" that's your opinion that i disagree with. it seems that you feel strongly about your opinion in not wanting your kids to be one of "those kids", so why not offer me the same respect of my opinion.

[Artichokie]

we are an organic/whole foods/no refined sugar family. My DD is two years old and has never had junk food or any kind of juice drink. we are actually harassed and taunted for our beliefs irl and it is hard to stand up for what we believe in, but we do. I will not let my dd have a cookie at gramma's house. She cannot have her share of the easter candy at church. No cake at parties, no juicy juice. It irks me to no end that it the same people who would never criticize a vegetarian for not permitting their kid to eat a hamburger think that our food choices for our family are fair game for their 2 cents.

We make cookies and ice cream and other yummy treats, but feel very strongly about not eating food created by the industrial food complex. that includes food that contains refined sugar (which is overly subsidized by our government).

we have ongoing discussions about our food choices and as she gets older she will be more involved in our family's food choices. For now, however, dh and i are her voice on this subject.

[mrspineau]

I would be embarassed really to give or allow my son treats all the time. I grew up eating pretty much ONLY junk food, and I became extremely addicted to food, gained a lot of weight and became very unhappy. I have had to really learn about food on my own and work very very hard to lose the weight and become healthy again, and it was actually quite traumatic emotionally and physically. I want my kids to be as healthy as they can be. I allow treats once in a while, and try to teach and model healthy habits. I do find that most of the moms I know do that as well, and the ones that don't genuinely don't know any better. I figure that there has to be a balance, but ultimately I know that if I have to say no when other moms are saying yes I have a good reason and I am doing my son a favor. I wish I could tell all the other moms I see about why junk food is bad and why they should avoid sugar and all that, but the reality of it is, its all around us, everywhere, in stores, in convenience food, and on tv. so, if I truly want my son to be healthy, then he's going to have to be able to do it while others are not.