Aversion to nursing?

[lillymonster]

I nursed DD until she was past 3, she started to wean on her own when I got pregnant, she stopped nursing completely last week and I am almost 11 weeks. During the 3 years that I nursed her, she was allergic to diary, egg and legumes (she had issues with soy, and things like guar gum, locust bean gum, fenugreek, almost all beans), so I cut those out of my diet. She also had delayed eating, so she didn't really eat solids until she was 2 1/2, and lived entirely off breastmilk for that time.

I am actually happy she weaned because unfortunately I have bad morning sickness and every time she nursed, I would vomit.

Well, now that I pregnant with #2, I keep thinking I don't want to nurse. I don't even want to try. First, the thought of it makes me want to vomit (I still have morning sickness so I think that might go away), but the thought of having the same problems again, being on a restricted diet and having a child not interested in eating again scares me.

I battled for so long with doctors who told me I was harming her by not putting her on formula, or telling me that she was being "spoiled" because I was giving in to her demands that I just don't want to fight that fight anymore. I had to battle with a doctor who told me my child would be brain damaged because I nursed her! I was very stressed and depressed about the whole thing and still feel that I have a chip on my shoulder about how I was treated by doctors.

I had a lot of difficulty with pumping and DD didn't really accept bottles and she nursed constantly. I don't know if I want to go through this whole thing all over again. Is this just a phase because I am pregnant?

[ps4624]

I don't have any experience to share with you, but wanted to send you hugs! You deserve accolades for being so dedicated to your DD, not treated poorly by those who were supposed to be helping you! You rock, mama!

[karika]

I read your post yesterday and have thought about your situation some. After the lengths you went to to provide your daughter with the best nutrition possible, it is obvious you truly believe that breastmilk is something every baby needs. You fought for her right to receive your milk. You changed how you eat to make your milk something that was healthy for your daughter. ! I too am dairy free, soy free and gluten free. I love it. I do not feel as though my diet is limited. I feel free since changing. I feel everyone else are the ones limiting their diets since most of the foods in the store are gluten, dairy, or soy or any combination thereof. I find I eat a lot more fruits and vegetables. I have a smoothie every day with a banana, frozen or fresh fruit (cherries, blueberries, peaches, strawberries, cranberries), spinach, homemade almond milk or So Delicious coconut milk and or orange juice and sometimes honey. I make GFCFSF muffins, cakes, cookies (with organic unrefined sugar). I tried different pastas until I found ones we like. I also stopped eating mammals recently, so I eat organic chicken and eggs.

I would highly recommend not seeing a health professional that does not mesh with your core beliefs. If the same peds are all you have available in your insurance, just skip it. Use a ND if at all possible, if anyone. WBV are just an excuse to give vaccines. Or other treatments that create illness. Also, delay or deny all vaccines. It is a provable point that the peanut (which most likely extends to legumes) allergy epidemic is because of an ingredient in vaccines. http://peanutallergyepidemic.com/about.html I would recommend foregoing all western medicine unless you have a broken bone or need an organ removed. Their methods cannot 'fix' anything IMO. Their methods create the issues so they have things to 'fix', which creates more issues. Keep the clean diet through pregnancy and for life.

I will also say this, though you already know it, no two babies are alike. I have very different children. I also did not get any vaccines for dd2 and she did not have the same severe food sensitivities that dd1 did (she got newborn vax and 2 mo visit only). she had a reaction to dairy though but much milder than the one dd1 had. I believe that the food sensitivity problem is vaccine related, GMO related and also humans are just not meant to ingest certain things, just as cows are not meant to ingest corn or grains, yet humans have been feeding them that for years. It is affecting us all now.

You know that breastfeeding your baby is the only thing you can do. I say this based on the lengths you say you went to to nurture your other child. If it is too much, if you hate it, then you can cross that bridge when you get there. This is not something to consume your thoughts now. That is worrying and projecting into the future. I think if you avoid vaccines and anything injected or given to you in pill form (I mean antibiotics or IV solutions or epidurals or vaccines for you....) and stay gluten, soy and dairy free you will have a great nursing relationship. yes I think you are focusing on this because you are pregnant and projecting. Try harder to enjoy what you can in this moment, this is my advice.

you are a wonderful mama!

[lillymonster]

Thanks for responding

Originally Posted by karika

I would highly recommend not seeing a health professional that does not mesh with your core beliefs. Also, delay or deny all vaccines. It is a provable point that the peanut (which most likely extends to legumes) allergy epidemic is because of an ingredient in vaccines. http://peanutallergyepidemic.com/about.html

We did delay vaccines after she was 6 months, when I noticed it seemed her body couldn't handle it, she seemed to get worse for about a week or so after, her tolerance of foods become greater, so I stopped completely. I have recently started again, slowly, finishing some series that she started. She is over 3, so she was vaccine free for 2 1/2 years and it not getting any new ones until the series of ones she already has had have been finished, with time in between. Baby #2 will not be vaccinated right away

Originally Posted by karika

I think if you avoid vaccines and anything injected or given to you in pill form (I mean antibiotics or IV solutions or epidurals or vaccines for you....) yes I think you are focusing on this because you are pregnant and projecting. Try harder to enjoy what you can in this moment, this is my advice.

you are a wonderful mama!

I am planning on avoiding any vaccines this time around...sometimes I wonder I got the flu shot while pregnant...that one makes me wonder the most. I was 4 months at the time when I got and I don't know...it was something I had a gut feeling I didn't want to do, but did it anyway. Now I think that might have been the start of her issues.

I guess I just have a lot of fear, probably not of limiting my diet, but more of not being able to "fix" her and seeing she was pain and not being able to help, at least, until I figured it all out, which took a long time.

[karika]

I know the feeling about not being able to 'fix' dd. I was prescribed muscle relaxers and pain meds which I took during the month I conceived dd1(and the month after) after being told by a health official that I wasn't pregnant.... I had all my silver fillings removed and replaced while pregnant with dd1, had a course of IV antibiotics over 3 or 5 days due to a soft tissue infection I got while having a root canal (which I got laughing gas for all the dental work), had multiple U/S (3d ones even) then delivered in a hospital after receiving an IV, pitocin and an epidural. She had the eye goo, Vit K shot. I got her the first round of shots, and then at her 2 mo appt was bullied into getting them too. I had just started my research and felt it wasn't right, but didn't know enough yet. Now dd1 is, well I don't know how to put it... but I am sure it damaged her somehow. I have not had her dx, but she is ADHD or hyper for sure and quite a handful. Now that I have dd2, I see so many differences. I did not do any of the above with this one. She is much calmer, slept better, hardly cried until she was old enough to have an opinion. Dd2 has empathy, plays with her dolls whereas dd1 did not as a baby. I am trying to heal dd1 through diet and we have made some headway. She is pooping nearly every day (gluten free no did it I am sure) after a long history of it being 3-4 days between and the apparent mood swings have disappeared after removing soy and dairy. But she is still a handful I could only do what I knew to do though, and the 'health' professionals told me all those things were ok and good. But the difference between them is obvious, even at dd2's age. gg baby wants to go to bed