tell me happy stories!

[wholewheatchick]

DH and I are expecting our first baby in December, and I really want to co sleep. DH is more hesitant about it, but agreeable, since he sees that we will all probably get more sleep this way. He absolutely refuses to put our mattress on the floor, though, so at this point, we're planning on sidecarring a crib to my side of the bed.

I know there will be difficulties, but I could really use some happy stories about co sleeping, esp. ones involving daddies who fell in love with it after being hesitant.

[butterfly_mommy]

Well I consider our co-sleeping arrangement to be very successful and DH was hesitant at first (he was mostly worried about safety of baby like him rolling on baby or baby crawling off the bed).

We have a double memory foam bed on an Ikea bed frame with an Ikea crib frame and a natural rubber mattress sidecared to it. DH used some kind of sliding bracket and little pin lock thingy to actually attach the frames together. I use two pool noodles stacked on top of each other in the space between the mattress and frame in the crib so that the two mattress are touching. DS is now almost 2.5 years old and this has been our arrangement from the beginning.

This is waht bedtime and our night looks like now. Usually starts around 8 pm. DH helps DS get ready for bed (brush teeth, potty, diaper and jammies on, story) I come in for nursies and DH leaves. I lay down half in our bed and half in DS' crib and nurse DS and then when he is done nursing if he is not asleep he lies in his crib and I lie in our bed and sort of on the crack and DS will fall asleep in 5-30 mins with usually no help from me or sometimes a song and a back rub (he can get over stimulated by this now) Once he is asleep if I havn't fallen asleep I get up lay a body pill were I was lying to keep DS from rolling out of his crib and have a few hours to myself or with DH.DS now only nurses in the morning around 6:30 and falls back asleep and sleeps till 8:30 (9:30 if I let him) We don't really wake up, he stirs and asks for nursies and I stir I roll him into the middle of the bed and pop him on and we both fall back into slumber. He cuddles with DH for about an hour before DS has to get up. DH LOVES co=sleeping and would not do it any other way. He is a huge advocate for co-sleeping and doesn't get why more don't try it.

I wont lie we had some bumpy times and rough sleep and I am so glad we were co-sleeping as I think it would have been way harder if we were not. The first 3 mons DS would only sleep on me, and nursed for about 30 mins every 2 hours, like actually lying on me. I would prop myself up with pillows and sleep in 1.5 hour stretches day and night. We lived in our bed for those first few months. DS was 4 mons exactly (I remember the day) the first time he allowed me to leave him on the bed alone for a nap. I used to have to go in and settle him and nurse him in the evenings every 1.5-2 hours for about 5-15 mins. DS cont to nurse every 2 hours till he was about 2. Then there are the sleepless nights of illness. I love co-sleeping it is so natural for us and has been great. I really didn't feel sleep deprived and neither did DH. DS hardly had to stir to let me know he needed to nurse. Now DS is talking about apart beds and DH and I are really feeling sad and not ready but we will try it on the weekend.

Good luck and enjoy co-sleeping!

[starling&diesel]

We're happy co-sleepers too!

Our midwives suggested that we side-car instead of bed-share, but that didn't last even one night. The first night I tucked DD into a drawer with a blanket padding it, and put the drawer on the bed with us. That lasted about five minutes, and then DD spent the rest of the night on my chest. It was blissful!

We've spent every night together since. And without any special set-ups, other than when DD started to roll we removed out boxspring and set our IKEA frame to the lowest setting and just have the mattress, so we're all a little closer to the floor ... maybe a foot or so off the floor? Rather European, or so it looks.

In her early infancy, DD slept in my arms, or on my boob, or between DP and I, with her head closer to the headboard than us so as not to get tangled in the blankets. Now she sleeps between us, at almost 17 months old. She had free access to night-nursing, without either of us waking, which was awesome. Over the last couple of months though, her nighttime latch has become lazier and more painful and I was losing sleep, so I decided to nightwean. That's been pretty easy too! I just put a shirt on. She woke a couple of times, asking for her num-nums, but has adjusted well, and now knows to just cuddle during the night. I still nurse her in the morning before I leave for work (which is often very, very early.)

DD is a great sleeper, and usually sleeps in until about 0930 if the dog doesn't wake her up before then. If I'm the one still in bed with her, she nurses. If DP is the one home with her that day, they cuddle. DD has been able to back off the bed safely on her own since she was about ten months old. She never fell off the bed, thankfully.

Co-sleeping has been a great part of our parenting life so far. Especially when DD has been ill. It's a great comfort to have her with us, and not alone in another room.

As far as DP's reluctance goes, if your DP will be the main breadwinner for a while and will be out of the house for long hours, co-sleeping is a GREAT way to add many, many easy bonding hours for your child and him, and he doesn't have to do a thing! Just lie there and sleep and the added attachment comes naturally. How cool is that?

[starling&diesel]

Oh! And CONGRATULATIONS on your growing bean. You're already co-sleeping!

[starling&diesel]

And one more thing ... if you're planning on going back to work at any point, the added bonus hours of bonding apply to you too. I'm a paramedic and so am out of the house at about 0545 and not back until after 8pm. But I still get to hang out with DD all night!

[Chloe'sMama]

Not really a story, but every night when DH and I go to bed, we both give DD kisses and say how much we love that she is in bed with us. I feel lucky to have her so close.

We are planning on adding baby 2 in the mix in Sept. and are all going to be in the same 'king' bed.

[earth-mama]

We co-slept with our DD 100% of the time until she was about 1 year old. We also have a sidecar for her, but hardly used it. I preferred to have her in bed with us. I made nursing easier and I got a lot more sleep. At first my partner was nervous about having her in the bed with us. He was worried he would roll over on her and also his family was very worried about bed sharing. I grew up in a family where bed-sharing was the norm.

In the beginning I slept in between DD and my partner. DD was in between me and the co-sleeper so she could not fall off the bed. As she got bigger I would switch nursing side and she was sometimes sleep between DP and myself. Now sometimes she cuddles DP.

DP now enjoys bed sharing, especially the play time in the mornings.

We are planning on having a second child sometime in the future, so we got DD a bed of her own and have been putting her down at night in it. Sometimes she sleeps all the way through the night and sometimes I get her in the middle of the night or early morning and bring her into our bed. I'm not forcing her to move out of our bed, just gently encouraging her to sleep some in her own bed. She seems to like it and it give DP and myself some private time

Co-sleeping and bed-sharing is great. There are rough nights (teething, restlessness, reactions to vaccines--if you get them), but this would be the same if the baby slept in a crib in the another room.

Partner to (7 years) Mother to Lily (17 months) 2 and 1

[sundaya]

DH was nervous, more than reluctant. We can't have the mattress on the floor, because DH is allergic to our dog, who would be constantly in the bed if he could be. So, DH built sort of a wall on one side, the entire length of the bed, with a changing table on the other side. DD is a heat-seeking baby, though, and is always touching one of us.
We have had rough nights. Teething stinks. But, teething is easier when no one has to go get the baby from the other room. DD is 18 months now, and when she wakes up, and DH is there (he often leaves early for work), she rolls to him and snuggles him, sometimes pats him to wake him up and smile in his face. When he has to be away from her, because of long work hours, he can still snuggle with her when he gets home. She'll usually wake up enough to smile at him, and go back to sleep.

[NEastMomma]

Congratulations!!!

We have been co-sleeping most of the time for months now and we love it! Acutally, we just chatted today about how special it is to awaken next to our sweet 10month old, how others miss out on this, how we'll surely cherish these memories, etc.

DH was reluctant about co-sleeping (for a myriad of reasons), but on board with not CIO. For the first 5mos DS slept in a basinette pushed right up against our bed. Eventually he outgrew it and we attempted to move him into his own crib, but he woke up constantly. I broached co-sleeping again and showed DH just one little article by Peggy O'Mara. What hit home w/ him was when she said that humans are the only mammals who (sometimes) don't cosleep.

So we "tried" it and yup, DH loves it now! But we think we're seeing the end of our co-sleeping days b/c of DS. We recently went on vacation w/ friends and put DS in a pack-n-play in our bedroom so we could stay up and visit. Well, DS actually slept for a few hours at a time (was waking hourly or sooner). Now at home we put a pack-n-play in our bedroom and he goes in there to sleep and sleeps for hours. Eventually he'll awaken though at 4am or so and we bring him right into bed with us to nurse and finish sleeping.

Good luck!

[hildare]

we totally <3 cosleeping.
i woh, so i get to bond at night.. i don't have to wake all the way up and get up to feed dd during the night. on the weekends, dd will sleep till around 8, and her favorite thing to do in the morning upon waking is "get dada.." she'll crawl towards him and pat his face awake. it's the cutest thing.
during the week, i get up at 6 to get ready for work. during the night, she sleeps cuddled up next to me (and the boobies) but at 6, i kind of slide out of bed and dh slides over to cuddle her. he's really enjoying it more than either of us imagined. me, too! of all the ap things we do, cosleeping is absolutely the best, imo.

[Qbear'smama]

Hi, Wholewheatchick! we love co-sleeping and DD is 4. We agree that the years when she will be our little person all snug in our bed are short and fleeting and we know in years to come, we'll look back at having her there very fondly. At first DD slept between us on a very firm orthopedic pillow (you know they're kind of U shaped?) and she didn't stir from it (they really don't move at all at first ). I think we were worried about having her "right there" with us on the bed. Then, when her legs started to hang off of it, we had her right on the mattress (thin cotton receiving blanket under her, better to catch spit-up than the sheets), high up so she wasn't covered with blankets (we'd scootch down a little). So easy for nursing, so reassuring for everyone when she was sick, DH hardly woke up at all in the night because DD would make the slightest squeak and I would nurse her back to sleep, she'd barely wake up herself. As she got older, it became more of a self-serve milk bar , with her climbing up onto me (laying on my back) to nurse and ending up passing out on top of me, me hardly conscious. (I don't have very big boobs, so it would be a little different if they were bigger, probably more of a side-lying nursing position). I did night-wean her while still co-sleeping, which was a little rough, just refused to nurse her but offered other comfort, she was angry about it for a few nights, then undisturbed sleep, it was sweet!!! As an infant and young toddler, there was nothing cuter or funnier than waking up with this tiny little face an inch from yours, already awake, all wide eyes and a morning greeting in whatever form of language she had at the time.

There are so many nights when DD has her arms spread, one hand touching each of us. So sweet. Definitely needed to teach her a little etiquette here and there, like no "jazz hands" in mommy or daddy's face (weird little habit), we don't like sleeping in an H formation so we have had to turn her to face the same way as us. And as she got bigger, doggie lost his spot at the bottom of the bed (too hazardous if he gets a kick in the middle of the night, dachshunds are not that understanding about that kind of thing). We have been punched or kicked very rarely, but generally DD is a pretty calm sleeper.

When she turned 3 she started asking about her own bed in her room. Funnily enough, we had moved and not even bothered to set it up, but we did then and she was into it. And then not. So for the sake of having a little alone time, we instituted the rule that most nights, she starts off in her own bed and if she wakes, she is more than welcome to climb in. Generally, she is ok with this, DH reads her a story in her room and she goes to sleep. 95% of the time, she ends up in our bed, between us in "her" spot. But DH and I get some nice alone time from bedtime til about 3am. The thing is, the nights when we are awake late and she doesn't wake up, DH tends to go get her. Waking up to that little loving person is so so sweet. I can't say DH was really reluctant, but he wasn't sure he would like it and now, we both agree that we love having her there and for me as a WOHM, it is extra time with my lil honey. When she wakes up and rolls over to cuddle DH, he looks at me over her head with the happiest smile, I really think we are all very close because we share sleep. And lots of cuddles in the morning.

Long post to say, we love co-sleeping and are looking forward to adding our new one and hopefully it will be as great with him/her as it has been with DD. Good luck!