I know this will pass, but...

[MeredithK]

I'm having one of those days when I just don't feel like I can do it anymore. I keep on reminding myself that it will pass...that it won't be like this forever, but it just doesn't seem to be helping.

DS, 8 months, is just wearing me out. For 3 months, he's been waking up hourly. He only naps on me and he is struggling even with that. For 24 hours straight, every day, I am comforting a child. He has always been difficult, but I'm just pooped.

DH can only help so much (he's at work during the day and for night wakings, he can't really do anything). I have no family or even close friends near by.

I spend all day trying to figure out when DS is going to nap, how long is it going to be, what can we get done in between the naps, how am I going to eat.

Yes, I know he's teething, I know he's hitting milestones. Yes, he is the love of my life. But, today, I feel like I can't do it anymore. But I will because I love him.

Any sympathy, experiences, or just hugs would be appreciated

[karika]

When I get really frustrated, I would draw a bath for baby. Don't worry about cleaning them, just draw a bath. Let them play in there while you surf online on the laptop or read or do a puzzle. Or get in with them. Sometimes dd1 would have 3 baths a day....

[karika]

and you know, food sensitivity causes poor sleep IME. Are you both already GFCFSF and on a clean diet with no chemicals like HFCS, caffeine, food colorings, msg, etc?

[Mawood]

Meredith, I hear you. I have no family nearby either and my husband works a lot so it is mostly me and Olivia. Today I woke up and felt so sore and achy just from sleeping and side laying nursing...Motherhood can be so exhausting. Hang in there. You are not alone. There are a lot of Moms feeling like you!!!

[taramoon13]

. i completely understand. ds is now almost 3, but has had plenty of sleep issues. i hope you at least try to lay down and rest when your lo does sleep, don't worry about chores, etc. they'll get done when they get done-you don't need the extra pressure. have you tried either homeopathic remedies or motrin for the teething? we don't like to give anything unless absolutely necessary, but when we finally do and ds sleeps for more than an hour you realize how much they were needing sleep too. can your dh maybe watch your lo in the evening for just 1-2 hrs. so you can do something relaxing like taking a bath or reading?

[Bebe's Mom]

I am right there with you! DD is 9 months and doesn't nap, or very short naps. I also have no family nearby, which makes it very difficult. DH is home usually by 5 and he does give me a break. I gave up trying to get her to nap, and just hope that it happens. Don't worry about getting stuff done, if it happens it happens. I usually wait til DH gets home and then do a quick tidy. But as far as trying to get anything major done, forget it!! You will only stress yourself out more.

[AndtheStars]

Meredith, I'm right there with you. Sometimes I have to remind myself that my DS won't remember any of what is happening at this age. We, as mamas, perceive our LO's as unhappy or fussy and our instinct is to try really hard to make things better. In reality though, our LO's won't remember how they felt and they probably really aren't that upset. I also totally feel you on the sleep thing. DS has never been a good sleeper (naps or otherwise) and just now at 10.5 months, has started sleeping for a 4 hour stretch in the beginning of the night. Sleep deprivation makes everything during the day that much harder. I try to take the long view and tell myself that if I can just make it to the next week, things will be better. They usually aren't better, necessarily, but they are different which somehow is more tolerable. Being a mama is HARD! s to you!

[texaspeach]

[MamieCole]

Been there. Done that. Have the t-shirt.

Hang in there. It gets better. I promise.

[crunchy_mommy]

I remember 8-10 months being one of the hardest times -- especially with the lack of sleep that seems to be nearly universal with that age... it got better quickly though, DS is 16mos now & I LOVE this age, he has finally outgrown some of his 'difficultness' (is that a word??) and although he's still pretty high-needs he is just so much easier than he was at the stage you're at now.

Could your DH give you an hour or two to yourself, maybe he could take DS out for a bit so you can rest, take a bath, etc. or you could go shopping or for coffee... I was usually hesitant to be separate from DS because of his frequent nursing so often DH would just take him outside or upstairs (anywhere where I couldn't really hear him) or I would go read a book in the quiet car in the driveway. Just getting away for a short time can make a world of difference in your ability to deal with it!

[marinak1977]

[gurglebaby]

I feel your pain! I'm on ds2 who is 8 months now and it's exhausting...I know it gets better because my ds1 sleeps great now, but in the moment it seems far away. Hang in there and know that all the other mama's are right there with you!

[P.J.]

Big hug for you. I feel ya!
I'm a very new mom, my son is only 4 weeks, but on most days is really fussy and often during the day he misses that window of sleepiness and then cannot fall asleep and just keeps fussing and fussing. My hubby does help quite a bit but also works most days and then when he gets home is not into immediately getting handed a screaming baby (in general he has a really hard time coming to terms with how fussy our baby is). I live outside my native country and all of my good friends and family are thousands of miles away, so I totally understand how that is.

What people have told me when I'm despairing is: it does get better, it's all "stages" and this one will pass. Even the most colicky baby will eventually outgrow it. So, hang in there, and I will too! We can do it!

[leam811]

to you!

My DD is 10 mo and it's intense. I'm finding that walks with her in the sling, and baths, help a lot. Even just stepping outside for a few minutes. And ibuprofen when teething gets really fierce.

We're stronger than we ever thought, I find - hang in there!

PS I also find that coconut ice cream helps...me!

[BlueWolf]

I'm right there with you, mama. Somedays I wonder how we even survive. The past two weeks have been hell for us, to say the least. My husband has been gone for two weeks in a row with no home for the weekends (he travels every week but usually is home for Saturday and Sunday). Two weeks ago she was up 1-2 times hourly every night all night long due to teething, and this past week she was sick with bad diarrhea, vomiting and 101-103 fever. I nearly cracked during the last night of her sickness because I was just so exhausted, emotionally and physically drained from not having a break for two straight weeks, and just ready to quit it all. I still feel guilty at how I yelled at my poor baby in the middle of the night to just shut up. Not one of my finer moments.

M DD is 11 months now and is slowly getting better. We still have our impossible times like the past two weeks, but it generally easier to keep her content with her increasing mobility. Her independence brings her more happiness and she's easier to deal with. She's still the intense child she has always been but she likes being able to do what she wants on her own two feet now. Big big big difference with the mobility.

[MeredithK]

Thank you, thank you, thank you all!

I felt so much better reading all of your responses. I want to respond to each and every one of you, but since my problem is an intense baby, I'm sure you all understand.

Last night was a tiny bit better...every 2 hours instead, which is a step in the right direction. He slept on his tummy for the first time and I'm hoping he enjoys that and it will help him sleep.

I'm going to keep on trying new things and seeing if we can start to make some changes to our routine as it obviously isn't working all that well.

I'll try to ask for more breaks and try to do some stuff for myself. It's so hard.

But, all of your support has helped me over the past day and it is so nice (in a weird way) to not feel so alone.

So, thank you again!

[MeredithK]

Originally Posted by MamieCole

Been there. Done that. Have the t-shirt.

This totally cracked me up and I smile each time I think about it!

[MeredithK]

Originally Posted by karika

and you know, food sensitivity causes poor sleep IME. Are you both already GFCFSF and on a clean diet with no chemicals like HFCS, caffeine, food colorings, msg, etc?

Yep to all of those questions except the caffeine part. I have one cup of coffee in the morning. It's my only vice left...I also try to avoid most foods that can cause him to have gas or reflux, so I'm pretty limited to my foods. I guess I could try to cut out the coffee and see, but I so don't want to go there!!

[star*mora]

everett is like this too. up every 45min-1.5hr and it is exhausting. i have no family nearby too. am grateful for the boards so that you can really know you aren't alone in your struggles.

yes it will get better, but it isn't easy to remember that when you are in the thick of it or other ppl tell you about their miracle-my child sleeps 12hrs straight-babies.

hopefully writing it out helps ease things even if just a little

[BlueWolf]

I don't always get why people ask if you have family around for support. Maybe it's just my family but they only want to take on the baby when she's happy and wanting to play, explore, chat etc. No one wants to come over to rescue me in the middle of the night after 15 million wakes ups. No one ever offers to sleep with her one night so I can get some sleep (with the exception of my husband when he's actually home). I don't really except them to want to help with my night time parenting.... but that's the only time I actually need help.