3 part question - leaking and Does this make me a bad mom? and frequency

[jenrett]

1. Is it normal to leak like crazy under these circumstances: while nursing (leaking out of other boob), when baby cries, when HOLDING baby, even though baby is not crying, when taking hot shower and wondering if baby is going to be hungry and should I hurry?!? Oh, and at night (i wake up and the sheets are soaked, so is my t-shirt)...though I'm pretty sure DS plays with my boobs if he wakes and I am still sleeping, hehe. Oh, DS is 3 weeks old.

If this is all normal - does it stop, ever? I hate wearing nursing pads and I am not looking forward to having to wear them for the next 1-2 years if this leaking is going to continue!

2. I don't really have to go back to work right now, per se, but I own a gym and so part of my job requirement is to be in really good shape. I have been working out for the past week, and what I do is nurse DS and if DH is around and I am done nursing and the timing is good, we all head to the gym together and I workout, trying to get my workout in before DS wakes up.

It's really hard to have DS there b/c if he cries, my boobs hurt and start leaking, and it's hard to workout. My workouts are a total of 1 hour or less (time that I am at the gym, total). I'm considering starting to pump and leave DS home with DH when I go workout. I feel kind of selfish for doing so. Does this make me a bad mom? On the one hand, I sort of want to go bottle-free with DS, but on the other hand, I'd like to be able to leave DS with DH or grandparents to go do something fun. That's normal, right? I feel like I have to be able to do that to keep my sanity.

3. As babies age, what does the frequency of their nursing look like down the road. I'm wondering if taking DS with me to workout is just really hard right now because he often wants to nurse every 1.5-2 hours. But, if in 1 or 2 months, he'll be nursing every 3-4 hours or something, then I could deal with it, and maybe not use bottles at all, then.

Thoughts? Anybody have any advice from experience? Should I just pump and use bottles occasionally (like, 1x/day, max)? What's the benefit of going no bottles at all? Does it matter?

Thanks for reading!

[cocoanib]

#1- DD is 13 wks and my boobs leak alot.
They leak when she cries, when full at work before pumping, before I get in the shower sometimes, sometimes when I think about her, at night in between feedings.
It has lessened and my bed isn't as wet, but they still do leak.
I just use washable nursing pads during the day and at night I sleep with a t-shirt on to help soak up leakage. When it was really bad, I wore a loose bra with pads on.

#2- It was pretty impossible for me to get back to working out until 2 months pp. My boobs were way too heavy, sore and full so much of the time. I just had to wait until my supply and her feedings worked themselves out. I felt the same way as you though. I was like, "how am I ever going to get a good workout like this". It will be better with time though.
Now, before I leave for the gym in the am, I feed her and I can get through my workout without any problems. Sometimes even if I don't feed her directly before, I'm still o.k for awhile.

#3- My DD's feeding varies and I feed on demand. She does seem to go more time in between now though. She eats less too. Our longer feedings tend to be in the morning and in the evening when I get home from work. I don't feel like my boobs are on lockdown like in the beginning.
Sometimes I pump in the night if I get too full(she's sleeping longer now).
I also pump 2-3 times while at work.

We have to use bottles, because I'm away from her while I work. She eats 2-3 times with DH or at daycare from bottles, but prefers the booby and really goes to town when I get home at night.
HTH!

[fruitfulmomma]

Yes, the leaking is normal and yes, it should slow down eventually. Looks like he is only a few weeks old. Honestly at that age I try to stay in bed or as close to it as possible. Your body needs time to heal and too much activity can cause bleeding to resume or become heavier which isn't healthy for you.

I usually am okay leaving for a few hours once they hit the four month mark. I would not start pumping right now. He needs time to establish a good feeding pattern before you start using bottles if you choose to do that.

[penguintattoo]

The leaking slowed down around 3 months for me but I still have to use nursing pads. The lansinoh pads seem to be the most absorbent, I wear a soft bra at night so the sheets dont get soaked. I cant help you with the workout thing, my doc told me no exercise til 6 weeks but I'm not sure if thats the case for everyone.

[jenrett]

@cocoanib - I thought that pumping at night if your breasts are full increases your milk supply? Or, basically, pumping anytime that isn't replacing a feeding.

@fruitful mama - I am not planning on starting pumping soon, though I did read on kellymom that you can start at 3-4 weeks. I have heard other advice saying 6-8 weeks. I plan to ask my Midwife for her opinion. I'm just trying to plan ahead. I did also stay in bed/close to it for the first 10 days, and I think that helped my recovery a ton, and I have only upped my activity level this last week. I feel fine, so I think I am really lucky in that department!

@penguintatoo - thanks for the recommendation - I will try the lansinoh pads. Maybe I just need to try new nursing pads. Most docs say no exercise for 6 weeks, but my midwife said I can resume when I feel good and bleeding has stopped. I was in a different place, fitness-wise, than most mamas pre-pregnancy and even throughout the pregnancy, which is why I think I am find working out now. Still no bleeding has resumed.

Thanks for all of the help. Sounds like I should just get used to the leaking... :-/

[Asparagus78]

Everyone is different, and in my case, I leaked for about 6 months with DS1, and only for a few weeks with DS2, although if DS2 has gone 3 hours without a feed, I will leak (he`s 7 months and nursing every 2-3 hours - my choice). Try good quality coton pads - IMO they`re much better than disposables, and you don`t feel guilty changing them every couple of hours.

I also resumed working out (running) around the 3 week pp mark, but I also ran throughout most of both pregnancies. No bleeding, and I felt MUCH better if I exercised than if I didn`t.

[jenrett]

Originally Posted by Asparagus78

I also resumed working out (running) around the 3 week pp mark, but I also ran throughout most of both pregnancies. No bleeding, and I felt MUCH better if I exercised than if I didn`t.

Phew, makes me feel better. Exercise is a part of who I am, and has been for most of my life. I also feel better, physically, if i get a workout in. I was starting to wonder if i was setting myself up for a disaster.....

[cocoanib]

Originally Posted by jenrett

@cocoanib - I thought that pumping at night if your breasts are full increases your milk supply? Or, basically, pumping anytime that isn't replacing a feeding.

I only pump at night if she doesn't get up for her usual feedings. That's when I get really full. Also, when I pump at that time, I only do enough for relief.

[rlmueller]

Normal normal normal

Your boobs couldn't be more normal if you tried. Leaking will happen and it will taper off too eventually--just give it a month or two. Even now at five months once in a while I will have a wet bed, but not often anymore.

You said: It's really hard to have DS there b/c if he cries, my boobs hurt and start leaking, and it's hard to workout. My workouts are a total of 1 hour or less (time that I am at the gym, total). I'm considering starting to pump and leave DS home with DH when I go workout. I feel kind of selfish for doing so. Does this make me a bad mom? On the one hand, I sort of want to go bottle-free with DS, but on the other hand, I'd like to be able to leave DS with DH or grandparents to go do something fun. That's normal, right? I feel like I have to be able to do that to keep my sanity.

This is fine--if it's not than I am downright abusive and neglectful. And since I don't think that is true than you certainly are just fine here. Happy momma does = happy family. I posted everywhere that I manual pump one side and she eats the other upon waking in the morning and I get a good bottle that way. Do that in the morning and at night and you should be good. Increase or decrease as needed if you are not working out of the house full time.

Your third statement is right on. At 3 months Laura ate every three hours and does that now too.

[jdg]

#1 - My babe is 4 weeks old and my boobs leak HEAVILY at all the times you mentioned and sometimes for no reason that I can identify. This morning I was in the shower, looked down, and both boobs were absolutely spraying - babe was a room away and making no sound, and I hadn't been thinking of her. I hate wearing a bra, but I'm in one (or a nursing tank) 24/7 now so I have something to put the nursing pads in. I was using washable pads, but I was soaking through 24 pads in less than a day. I'm now using the Medela disposable pads, which are thin and hold a lot and I only go through 6-8 pads in 24 hours. Obviously, no experience as to when it stops since my babe is only a week older than yours, but wanted to say that as far as I know, the leaking is normal.

#2 - Pumping isn't horrible and for many women it is necessary. I'll return to work in a few weeks and bottles will become a part of life. Because of problems nursing for a few days when babe was only 4-7 days old, I had to pump early and babe drank from a cup until we could get her back on the boob. When she sleeps for long periods of time at night, I wake up so full that I pump to relieve the pressure and am using this to build a freezer stash (at this rate, I pump only about 2-3x weekly, but enough for 2-3 feedings in each pumping session). If I go anywhere without her right now, it is reassuring to me that my husband has this stash available if she is hungry sooner than expected.

In general, you are right about not pumping unless it is replacing a feeding. However, many women who are returning to work will do one pumping session per day starting fairly early on so that they can build a freezer stash; this session is usually easiest to add in first thing in the morning. I would far rather tell my body that I need a few extra ounces produced per day and have a good emergency stash than not have that stash if I need it. Once the stash is built, and I return to work, I will use what I pump the previous day and stop adding an "extra" pumping. I may also look into donating to a milk bank, and would then keep the extra session in order to donate.

Do what is right for you. If pumping makes your life easier and lets you retain your sanity, then pump. If you would feel better about all milk going directly from you into your babe, then do that.

#3 - If the frequency didn't slow down, I'm not sure nursing mothers would ever keep their sanity! But I'll have to defer to other mamas with older babes as to how often.

[SaoirseC]

#1: I usually leaked for a few months in the beginning, maybe as long as 8-9 mos, though i don't remember specifically.

#2: I'd start to pump now if you have an oversupply, because I think it would help train your breasts to let down with the pump. I don't have much experience with pumps, so take what I say with a grain of salt, but I could never get more than an ounce from pumping. I think it's because I didn't really start pumping until later, and even then I didn't do it regularly. You can freeze your milk for later, when/if you introduce a bottle to your LO (I did with the first, didn't with my second, and haven't yet with this LO).

As far as #3 goes, this really depends on your LO's personality. Some babies nurse more or less frequently than others. Unfortunately, I don't remember anything about my daughter's frequency (she's the middle child), but my older son nursed constantly until he really started eating solids at around 2 years (we introduced very early around 4 months , but he never ate table food heartily until 2 years). At the same time, I never really left the house and didn't have other children to take care of, so it may have been a convenience thing. I remember my daughter nursed less frequently, but i don't remember the intervals. #3 is nursing more frequently than every 1.5-2 hours, but he's just a little older than your LO (just over a month old). I think frequency also depends a lot on your personality (do you use nursing as a band-aid like I did with my first?) and activity level. When the LO is more interested in watching what's going on around him, and you two are out and about, he's less likely to nurse frequently. And if he's at home with Daddy, he's probably less likely to need to nurse, simply because nursing isn't always about hunger.

[MeepyCat]

Also, I'd start to pump now if you have an oversupply, because I think it would help train your breasts to let down with the pump.

I would actually recommend AGAINST pumping if you have an oversupply - oversupply totally sucks and pumping makes it worse. If you're replacing a feeding, that's one thing, but if you're just trying to empty your breasts out, the problem will get worse.

If you don't have oversupply, you have some more flexibility on use of the pump. It's a different situation.

I think, if you have the ability to do it (DH willing and available and so on) it makes sense to leave the baby with him and go work out on your own. I find that if I nurse or pump right before leaving the house, there's less leaking. However, at the stage you're at, I carried an extra shirt in my bag.

In general, things that make you happy and healthy are good for your baby too.

[jenrett]

Originally Posted by MeepyCat

I would actually recommend AGAINST pumping if you have an oversupply - oversupply totally sucks and pumping makes it worse. If you're replacing a feeding, that's one thing, but if you're just trying to empty your breasts out, the problem will get worse.

If you don't have oversupply, you have some more flexibility on use of the pump. It's a different situation.

I think, if you have the ability to do it (DH willing and available and so on) it makes sense to leave the baby with him and go work out on your own. I find that if I nurse or pump right before leaving the house, there's less leaking. However, at the stage you're at, I carried an extra shirt in my bag.

In general, things that make you happy and healthy are good for your baby too.

I don't think I have an oversupply. I mean, I have plenty of milk, but I don't think I have the kind of supply that often leads to mastitis and other problems due to oversupply (which I don't know much about other than what I have learned by lurking on this forum).

I'm not sure how to start pumping to replace a feeding at this point - my MW recommends not doing any bottle feeding until 2 months if I can wait that long, which I can b/c I don't have to go back to work. Other people say 4-6 weeks is long enough to wait....so, I'm not sure. Once I am supplementing with a bottle, I plan to wake up, pump, and then go to workout, while DH feeds DS, if needed (which, we ALWAYS nurse upon waking, so I'm sure he will need it).

But, like I said, I don't think I have oversupply, so I could maybe add in an extra pumping session. I wouldn't mind starting to build up a small supply.

I did pump yesterday just to see what happened. It was 30 minutes, approx, after a feeding. I got almost nothing from my left breast, which I had just fed on (and also had more trouble keeping the suction on that side), and about 1.5 (or a little more) ounces on my right breast. Maybe a little more. This morning, before my workout, I pumped in the right breast while DS nursed on the left side (awkward!), and got about an ounce out, so I have a total of 3 ounces!

DH is also soooo eager to feed DS a bottle, b/c he wants to feel less helpless to soothe/feed DS.

Thanks for the advice!

[jdg]

Originally Posted by jenrett

I'm not sure how to start pumping to replace a feeding at this point - my MW recommends not doing any bottle feeding until 2 months if I can wait that long, which I can b/c I don't have to go back to work. Other people say 4-6 weeks is long enough to wait....so, I'm not sure. Once I am supplementing with a bottle, I plan to wake up, pump, and then go to workout, while DH feeds DS, if needed (which, we ALWAYS nurse upon waking, so I'm sure he will need it).

Bottle feeding should wait until nursing is "well established", which means different things for different mamas/babies. In general, if your babe is latching well, latching consistently, your supply is easily keeping up with his demand, you are consistently and correctly reading his feeding cues, and you feel as though both you and your son have things "figured out", then you can introduce a bottle. For most new mamas and babes, this seems to take about 4-6 weeks, some less, some more. To answer whether you are ready for a bottle, concentrate more on how things are going rather than on how old your son is.

When I pump in the morning, I have a routine of wake up and nurse my babe, then shower (the hot water gets the milk flowing), then pump as soon as I've dried off.